The First Ten Focus Group Feedback for Bird in a Snare: The Lord Hani Mysteries, vol. 1

Because Bird in a Snare was Book of the Day, some of our most trusted members have carefully looked over the cover, the description, and other aspects of this book as a part of purchase-intent focus group. We then asked each participant in the focus group if they planned to buy and read the book, and why they planned to buy and read the book or not. Their answer to that question and reasons are displayed below. We call this awesome feature The First Ten Focus Group.

Keep in mind, the responses from the members are not reviews. This is purchase-intent focus group which means the participants are people who have NOT yet bought or read your book. A purchase-intent focus group is an important and extremely useful marketing tool for any product, not just books. For other products, you might walk on the street and show people an item in a package and poll them about whether they would buy if or $X or not. These kind of focus groups are one of the ways big marketing companies find the ideal price points for products and test the effectiveness of different packaging. The focus group can help you identify your market so you how to target ads of your book, and it can (but may not) provide you new useful info about your "packaging" (e.g. your book cover, your book synopsis on Amazon, etc.). The point of the focus group comments is to give you information from people who have not bought or read your book about why they plan to buy your book which will help you in marketing the book. These are not reviews or critiques of your book because they are not from people have read the book. This is a marketing tool, not reviews. The trick of book marketing and book advertising is that you have to convince people who have not read your book yet that your book is worth buying and reading. For marketing, it doesn't matter much if people love your book after reading it if you cannot convince potential buyers before they read it that they will love it.

IMPORTANT: Any score over 10% is considered very good. And any score above 0% is acceptable. This is because we only poll about 20 or so readers, and all readers have to say "no" to almost all books. Over a million books are published each year. Even a very active reader cannot come close to even reading 1% of books out there.

This is also why publishing books is such a tough industry.

Alice Heritage

The cover art looks sophisticated and the title is intriguing, but that and the description both on OBC and Amazon point to historical fiction. I wouldn't have sampled this without the programme on the basis of those because this isn't normally my preferred genre. I didn't see any editorial reviews and the customer reviews were mixed, which at least means they're genuine. They showed that this is well researched but possibly confusing. Indeed, I won't buy this today also because I found some aspects distracting - there's something of an information overload with the glossary at the beginning and also there's a little too much telling or repetition. For example, the fact that Abdi-ashirta is not as benign or feeble as he seems is somewhat over-emphasized. I did enjoy the information about Hani's affection for the ducks and birds in general, like his pet heron. This seems professionally edited as I spotted no errors. My main suggestion for improvement is to place the glossary at the end instead of the beginning and to make the historical notes shorter, otherwise readers might be daunted before getting to the story proper. The official OBC review I saw makes some interesting points about the language, which was somewhat helpful, though my decision was mainly based on the sample and my reading preferences.

First Ten review added on June 9, 2022, at 4:57 am by Alice Heritage.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Dzejn_Crvena

Outside this program, I wouldn't have sampled this book because I didn't find the cover appealing. The OBC review and other customer reviews didn't convince me to read it when I learned that it has political and sexual contents. Moreover, I didn't change my mind when I sampled it because I'm overwhelmed with too much information in the historical notes. The book is a historical fiction about Egyptian culture and history. Most characters are against each other, even those who once were friends. Overall, it contains a lot of political drama. I like inclusion of the map that helped me visualize the setting of the story. However, I have trouble remembering the information about Egypt, so I wouldn't read further. The book seems professionally edited, and I don't have suggestions for improvements.

First Ten review added on June 9, 2022, at 4:56 am by Dzejn_Crvena.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Stellah Chege

Based on the cover, I would not have read this book. It did not appeal to me. However, after reading the genre, blurb, editorial reviews, and customer reviews, it made me interested in reading the entire book. Sampling the first ten pages did not change my mind. I would love to read the entire book. The OBC review made me want to read this book as it gave me a summary of what to expect. I loved most how the author has included a map of the area setting. I did not know that Amen was an ancient god! This is why I love historical fiction. I can always learn something from this. I did not find any errors and I believe it is professionally edited. I have no suggestions so far. I will buy and read this book.

First Ten review added on June 9, 2022, at 4:55 am by Stellah Chege.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Gabriella H

The cover looks attractive, and I like the title. Knowing what the book is about now, I also feel the title is fitting. I was drawn to this book after reading the OBC official review. I like history, and I'm interested in ancient Egypt. I'd like to see how Hani will get himself out of the sticky situation he is in. I also like how the book started. I've already learned quite a bit. So, I'll be completing this book. I didn't see any errors in the first ten pages, and I believe they were professionally edited. I have no suggestions for improvements. My decision to read this book wasn't influenced by the blurb, editorial review, or customer reviews. If I weren't a part of this program, I would've sampled this book because of the cover.

First Ten review added on June 9, 2022, at 4:14 am by Gabriella H.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Eunice Geres

I wouldn't have read this book if it weren't on BOTD because it doesn't seem like one I would enjoy. Even though the book cover reminds me of Kane Chronicles by Rick Riordan, I feel like I'll be bored reading a historical fiction that is not for young adults. There was nothing in the official review that interested me. When I opened the sample of the book on Amazon, I was impressed that the illustration was very beautiful. The map really looks good. I didn't quite enjoy the sample of the book. It made me remember how hard I found it to read Egyptian names when I read Kane Chronicles before. I liked that there was a long glossary in the beginning. That was really helpful. I find the first chapter to be very slow. However, the imagery was well-done. The author is great at narrating as the readers can easily imagine the surroundings of the ancient times with great details. I will not continue to read this book because I find it too slow, and I feel like I would just get bored trying to remember all the names. I also don't have anything to recommend, as I believe it was already okay. I also didn't encounter any grammatical mistakes in the sample of the book.

First Ten review added on June 9, 2022, at 3:57 am by Eunice Geres.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Jennifer Garcia 555

Historical fiction is not the type of book I usually read. I do like the cover and title so I was interested to read what this book was about. After reading the description and an official OnlineBookClub review, this story does not sound like something I would enjoy, so I would not pick this book to read. I read the sample and did not see any editing errors, so this book seems professionally edited. I like Hani and his love for birds. I felt bad he had to watch others hunt them. I have no suggestions for improvement, but the long similar names made the story a bit hard to follow for me. I was not interested enough in the story to continue reading past the sample pages. The sample did not change my mind about this book, so I will not buy or finish reading it.

First Ten review added on June 9, 2022, at 3:39 am by Jennifer Garcia 555.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

KafeliKe

N.L. Holmes' Bird in a Snare seems to be an intriguing and thrilling historical fiction tale that will not disappoint aficionados of the genre. It is a story set in ancient Egypt approximately 1350 BCE, during which time the kingdom underwent many changes brought about by Akhenaten, the late Amenhotep III's son. He had ascended to the throne after his father. The religious reforms were among the changes he made. The inclusion of a map that gives a vivid picture of the places discussed in the book is the aspect of the novel that I liked the most in the sample that I read. In the first ten pages, I didn't find anything that I didn't like. The book has a great cover and is well-structured. On OnlineBookClub, it had a well-written review that included a detailed summary of the book's content. It was amazing. I'm not a big lover of historical fiction, so I'll pass on this one. Although this book had great customer reviews, a well-designed cover, and well-written reviews, none of these factors influenced my decision to not finish it. It appears to have been professionally edited, as there were no errors in the sample I read. The novel is satisfactory, and nothing more can be done to improve it.

First Ten review added on June 9, 2022, at 2:15 am by KafeliKe.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Jorge Leon Salazar

The cover and title are catchy and creative but at first glance, they don't suggest what the story is about. I'm unsure if interested users will be attracted. In general, I like historical fiction. The blurb comments that the story revolves around Hani, who during the investigation of a murder discovers corruption and other irregularities. Also, the blurb indicates his investigation is complicated by the new king's religious reforms. However, he sets out to gather enough evidence for his superiors to prosecute wrongdoers, despite the king's protection. Most of the customer reviews are favorable. Based on these elements I could give this book a try. I found the historical notes educational as it gives a general idea of the history around the religious reforms that King Amen-hotep IV imposed. He replaced with the Aten, the Theban gods Amen-Ra and his family. Plus, I consider the inclusion of a list of characters very opportune since many names are difficult to remember. Even some characters are known by two names, as in the case of kings. The first pages felt slow to me as not much action happens. Although they serve to portray some characters like Hani and his family and the hapiru leader, Abdi-ashirta. However, a lot of these pages were devoted to situations like duck hunting or dinner at Hani's house. I was impressed by the character of Baket-Iset who is bedridden and unable to move from the neck down. Abdi-ashirta is an intriguing character since he seems to have a hidden agenda not only from Hani but also from the king. For example, it is strange he mentioned the phrase "I don't lack for successors." What I sampled did not completely capture me as it was a bit slow and I found it difficult to follow. Therefore, I decided not to read the rest of the book. The official OnlineBookClub review indicates the book explores the theme of religious reform and its impact on common people. In addition, it mentions the story is presented in the vernacular. The editing looks outstanding since I did not see any detail to comment on. Overall, I didn't see anything that I believe could be improved. In summary, I will not read the rest of the book.

First Ten review added on June 8, 2022, at 10:45 pm by Jorge Leon Salazar.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Owuamanam Eberechukwu

Hani was taking Ahdi-Ashwitha to witness and feel the sacred and mighty river. In the first few pages, the author describes the events and how Hani has come to see the ducks in the river as friends. I don’t really have anything I like in the pages I read. The cover design and title are not good enough to make me choose the book. The beginning pages seemed bland. The cover page and title seemed influenced by cultural and religious beliefs. The pages I read are exceptionally well edited. However, the names in the book are really difficult to read. I suggest the author should revamp the book. I will not buy and read the book because the first ten pages were so dry and boring that I nearly fell asleep while struggling to read them. This is my personal thoughts and was not influenced by reviews, comments, or blurbs on OBC or not.

First Ten review added on June 8, 2022, at 6:01 pm by Owuamanam Eberechukwu.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Michelle Menezes

Based on the title and cover, I thought that the book would be a modern mystery novel. But it turned out I was wrong, and the book was a historical mystery. The blurb was interesting, and since I find the setting of ancient Egypt fascinating, I had a positive feeling about the book. I avoid reading editorial and customer reviews, as I like to form my own opinions, but I did read the Official OnlineBookClub review, and it had good things to say about the book. Based on all the above things, I decided to give it a try. After reading the first ten pages, I have decided not to continue with it. I liked the writing style; it is descriptive and has a lyrical quality to it. The beginning didn't have much going on except Hani entertaining Lord Abdi-ashirta. The only reason I won't be reading the book is because of the complicated names of people and places. Despite a glossary being provided at the start of the book, I have a feeling I'd be confused. I don't think the book needs any improvement, and I didn't notice any errors, so the book seems professionally edited.

First Ten review added on June 8, 2022, at 1:45 pm by Michelle Menezes.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Ayomikun Babalola

I would definitely have picked this book. I don't usually read political fiction. Therefore, the genre would have discouraged me from purchasing this book. However, the blurb was what sold this book to me. This is because I love stories that are inspired by ancient civilizations. The cover and title are also aesthetically pleasing. The book seems highly praised in its editorial and customer reviews, but they did not influence my opinion. I am going to buy this book. I've always loved getting my hands on anything that talks about ancient civilizations, and novels are not the exception. Upon reading the first ten pages, it is easy to see how amazingly skilled the author is. I soon found myself absorbed in the story, desperate to read more. The first ten pages reaffirmed my original opinion of this book.

I found no errors while I read this book. This is a testament to the professional editing this book must have received. It was a nice surprise to find out that the author is an archaeologist herself. It spoke of how accurate this book would be in depicting the era. I loved the author's skill in setting a scene. Furthermore, I was never bored. I feel it would be a bonus if this book could be added to a genre that represents the elements of ancient history as well. This would draw in people who love reading books based on ancient history. Though this book had an official Onlinebookclub review, it did not influence my opinion at all.

First Ten review added on June 8, 2022, at 7:05 am by Ayomikun Babalola.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Andrada Madalina

"Bird in a Snare" by N.L. Holmes is a historical fiction that illustrates the 14th-century Egyptian kingdom. I would not have sampled the book based only on its title, cover, and blurb. However, I was intrigued by the two Official OnlineBookClub reviews. The book seems professionally edited. I liked the brief dialogues and descriptive passages, but I will not read the whole book because I disliked the plot focusing on Lord Hani and Akhenaten's reign.

First Ten review added on June 8, 2022, at 5:34 am by Andrada Madalina.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Rita Nuncia

Bird in a Snare by N.L. Holmes is a crime thriller blended with historical fiction. The book is about Lord Hani, an Egyptian diplomat under the rule of Akhenaten, who was sent to investigate the murder of a bandit leader in Syria. During the investigation, he encounters corruption, tangled relationships, and yet more murder. His investigation is complicated by the new king’s religious reforms, which have struck Hani’s own family to the core. Lord Hani’s mission is to amass enough evidence for his superiors to prosecute the wrongdoers despite the king’s protection. Historical crime thriller books especially on Egyptian histories are one of the most intriguing genres I have ever read. I was very excited after reading a review on this book as I found out the genre of this book. I would have read it without the First Ten program being the reason. After reading the first ten pages of this book, I am happy to know that I was not mistaken. The few pages that I have read are so interesting, thrilling, intriguing, informative, and suspenseful. Therefore, I would love to buy and read the whole book. This book seems professionally edited as I did not notice any grammatical or typographical errors while reading the first ten pages of the book. I like the cover of the book, the author used an Egyptian drawing which I believe is important to the plot of the book. I do not see anything that needs to be improved as I did not notice any fault in the few pages I read. I read an OnlineBookClub official review and it convinced me of how interesting the book is.

First Ten review added on June 8, 2022, at 3:53 am by Rita Nuncia.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Vidhi Adhikari

Although this book has received numerous positive customer and OBC reviews, I was expecting a little more twist in the story mentioned in the description, apart from the book being a historical fiction set in Egypt. Plus the title and cover could also use a little sprucing up. Although I loved the images of the maps in the book, I found some punctuation errors and unnecessarily long sentences in the text ('It is worth noting that, for most of its history, Egypt was divided into two parts, the Upper and Lower, originally two separate kingdoms and always very different in geography and temperament.'). Also, since the writing style of the book is not simple enough, I will not be finishing it anytime soon. I would also suggest fixing the alignment of the text in the first few pages.

First Ten review added on June 8, 2022, at 2:44 am by Vidhi Adhikari.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Harsh Soni 3

After looking at the cover and title, the book seems like a historical fiction that I, generally, don't read. Then, I read the Official OBC review of the book (after that I don't need any other blurb or review) where I came to know that the book contains crude language and instances of sexual acts which further increases my first impression towards the book. So, I am going to pass this book because of the reasons mentioned above. After reading the sample, I found that the author includes the map and short descriptions of characters in the book. But my favourite thing about the book is that the author tells the readers which character is fiction and which is not. And I believe every historical fiction should also tell the readers which character is fiction and which is not to better distinguish between fiction and reality. I found no errors in the book. I have no suggestions.

First Ten review added on June 8, 2022, at 2:33 am by Harsh Soni 3.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Damian Keyes

I was able to read a sample of Bird in a Snare through Amazon. From the first moment I started reading the story, I could tell this takes place during ancient times. Honestly, I was not interested in reading anymore because I saw the long list of characters in this book—it's extensive. I think the author should move the glossary of names near the end of the book. I was overwhelmed to see that many names I would have to memorize. Before I read the official review of this book on the OnlineBookClub website, the book title and cover stood out to me. In my reading of the story, I admired Lord Hani's dedication and love for his family. I'm family-oriented, so that stood out to me. I did not find any grammar or spelling errors in what I read, so I can tell that this book is professionally edited. Unfortunately, I won't be buying this book; it just doesn't suit me.

First Ten review added on June 7, 2022, at 10:32 pm by Damian Keyes.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Sushan Ekanayake

Bird in a Snare: The Lord Hani Mysteries, vol. 1, the cover page features a bird and a sword. And the title itself reveals that there is a mystery inside. The Genre is historical fiction, about which I have mixed feelings. Blurb summarises that the book is a historical fiction with a mystery to be solved by a character who has to save his own life first, like a bird in a snare. The editorial review and the customer reviews have highly appreciated the book. But none of them were convincing enough for me to choose this to read, since none of them highlighted any unique feature about the book comparing to historical fiction that are related to ancient Egypt.

The initial pages describe a meal offered by the protagonist to an outlaw-leader. The start was quite slow, and the way that the author starts to build up the story hints that this is quite a complex mystery case, which I usually do not prefer as I love to get to the end quickly. So my initial thought on not going to read this was unchanged after reading the first ten pages.

Anyway, the book was professionally edited, and the initial pages were free of errors. I liked how the author gave the reader little by little details building the picture of ancient Egypt starting from the very beginning. Nothing specific noted that could be improved within what I read.

There were official OBC reviews, and many volunteer reviews as well. They highly praised the book, but none of them changed my mind as the thought of "this book is not for me" had already sunk to my mind.

First Ten review added on June 7, 2022, at 10:05 pm by Sushan Ekanayake.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Hazel Arnaiz

I will skip this book outside the program. Looking at the cover and title, I am clueless about the contents. Based on the blurb, the plot about politics and murder sounds usual to the genre. Customer reviews are mostly positive. After sampling, I appreciate the historical notes and glossary. The context manages the expectations of the audience before starting the story. Likewise, it says the names are the original spellings. But I find them challenging to read. I suggest adding the pronunciation of these terms. Having an idea of what they sound like will help me remember. The sample did not change my mind, and I will still pass on this one. The initial chapters did not build enough intrigue to continue reading the book. It focused more on the vivid description of the surroundings and lifestyle of the characters. Also, the pace is slow to my liking. As for editing issues, here are some examples.

Location 57. Grammar. It seems a preposition is missing. Consider adding "for."

Since Akhenaten is known to have reigned [] seventeen years, this would move his death date earlier than the commonly accepted one.

Location 66. Grammar. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

This collection of diplomatic correspondences from the reigns of Amenhotep III and IV [were] found at Akhet-aten (today Tell el-Amarna), the new capital established by Akhenaten.

The official OnlineBookClub review has helpful insights.

First Ten review added on June 7, 2022, at 9:15 pm by Hazel Arnaiz.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Soraya Bayah

I did not feel interested in the plot of this book, as it dives deeply into history. I am not up to a book that heavily requires me to learn more about civilization. If I were more familiar with the history and enjoyed it, I would have certainly cherished this one, along with many others. I would not have picked up this book from the title, genre, cover, or review like OBC, as I do not enjoy historical fiction much. I did not find typographical errors. I enjoyed the descriptive writing and the smooth narration. The introduction was commendable and did not feel tedious. I wonder why the lord is so confident. It is as if he knows he needs successors. I am sure those who prefer historical fiction will find this an enlightening and enjoyable book. Well written, but I will have to skip it.

First Ten review added on June 7, 2022, at 4:10 pm by Soraya Bayah.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Amy Luman

I appreciated the glossaries of names, places, and gods at the beginning of the book. However, historical fiction is one of my least favorite genres, so I will not be reading the rest of this book. All of the names are very confusing to me and would make keeping track very difficult. The reviews, including the OBC one, and the blurb made mention of the fact that ancient Egyptians considered their kings to be gods. The title and cover probably reflect how Hani felt as his religious beliefs were undermined. I can’t suggest any improvements, and I do think that this was professionally edited.

First Ten review added on June 7, 2022, at 2:38 pm by Amy Luman.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

markodim721

I would choose to read a sample of this book because of the title and cover. I read customer reviews, the blurb, and the Official OnlineBookClub review but they did not influence my decision. One of the editor reviews pointed out the similarity of Lord Hani with Hercule Poirot and in that sense, it influenced my decision. The title of the book contains refined symbolism of hunting. The cover of the book fits well with the title and the design is reminiscent of ancient Egypt. I will read the book because I am interested in learning more about life in ancient Egypt. While reading the sample I did not notice any errors or typos and the book seems like it is professionally edited. Reading the sample did not change my mind from my original guess. I like how the duck hunt is described and especially the detail when the servants were sent to pick up the prey before the crocodiles got wind of them because it looks very authentic. I don't think anything needs to be improved in the book.

First Ten review added on June 7, 2022, at 1:52 pm by markodim721.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Rosemary Owolabi

The title of the book, "Bird in a Snare" by N.L. Holmes, is large enough for any reader to see. The name of the author is also unmistakable. The art cover of a bird with a sword hints at what the book might be about in a subtle way. I will say this is cleverly done. I like everything about the front cover of this book.

I was able to get a free sample of this book on the Kindle Unlimited app. If not for the first ten pages, I might never have come across this book. I appreciate the OnlineBookClub for this program. The instructions given on how to sample this book didn't lead me to the book's first ten-page sample.

I like how a map (the Egyptian Empire) is included, the names of the characters, a glossary of the gods, and a glossary of terms and places are also included. This is to make the book more accessible and easy to navigate. I will buy and read the remaining chapters of the book because I already like the character of Hani. He seems like a smart, thoughtful, and friendly man. Hani is not a vegetarian, but he seems to respect these unusual friends (fowls). When his guest, Abdi-ashirta, hunts the fowls with Hani's servants, Ashi-ashirta prefers to hunt rather than just watch like Hani. Abdi-ashirta finds not hunting the fowl absurd, but Hani doesn't care. I like Hani's attitude and consideration. I like the way the story begins on a light note. I want to buy the book to see where the remaining story leads Hani. I like his character already and I think he will continue to make the right decisions in this story. The story is still developing, and I like the direction it is going. The reason I want to get it is that it fits into the kind of genre of books I like to read. I would like to have it on my bookshelf.

I noticed some formatting issues, but the story seemed to be professionally edited. I didn't notice any errors or typos. The formatting issues should be improved upon.

The book had no OnlineBookClub review that I saw, but this didn't affect my decision.

First Ten review added on June 7, 2022, at 12:50 pm by Rosemary Owolabi.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Kira Bonita Reece

This is a book that explores ancient Egypt during a time when there was religious turmoil. The official OnlineBookClub review had high praises for this book and states that it is written in simple language.

I would not choose to read this book based on the cover, blurb, title, or genre. I was not able to sample the book so I'm not sure if it was professionally edited or not and if any improvements are needed. I won't be reading this one because I'm not interested in ancient Egypt and I wasn't able to view a sample.

First Ten review added on June 7, 2022, at 11:23 am by Kira Bonita Reece.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

va2016

The cover shows a bird, and the title says "Bird in a snare". The subtitle says it's a mystery. There are 149 Amazon customer ratings, with an average rating of 4 out of 5 stars, which is great. The Amazon summary tells what the story is about. As it is a mystery theme, and as I liked the overall story, I would have sampled the book even if not for the First Ten program. As I sampled through the book, I found the narration containing elaborate list of names of the characters and the Gods, and the first chapter introducing Hani. Even though I felt that the overall narration was not very interesting, since I liked the vocabulary and the overall story, I am going to read this book in full. I didn't find the sample professionally edited. I found a mechanical error in the first paragraph itself in which a comma is missing after the words "little reed boats". What I liked most about the book is the overall story. As an improvement I would recommend thorough proofreading. Although I found one OBC review of the book, my decision to read the book in full is based on my own sampling.

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 4:59 am by va2016.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Ekta Kumari

This book revolves around Hani who is an Egyptian diplomat sent on a mission to find the culprit behind the murder of a bandit leader. The book documents the struggles, corruption, and complications Hani faces during this mission. I liked the premise but wouldn't have read the book as I wasn't into the genre. The thing I liked the most while sampling, though, is that the author has outlined the background details. I also like that there is a map and elaborate details of the time the book is set in along with details about the main character. The text looks fairly well edited as I didn't find any significant errors in the portion sampled. I will rate the book as professionally edited. I did see an official review before sampling. However, I'll not be reading the whole book as I don't think the plotline and the genre suit my taste. I don't have any recommendations for improvements.

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 4:59 am by Ekta Kumari.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Manang Muyang

The cover and title convey the ancient setting of Egypt in 1350 BCE. The author is a professional archeologist, after all. The blurb talks about Lord Hani solving a murder mystery amidst the corruption in the leadership, even up to the level of the king! Hmmm, why am I not surprised? I would have wanted to sample the book even outside of the program because of the intriguing blurb. The book opened with "Historical Notes and Glossary" that gave a background of the time and enumerated the characters and places. I knew then that I would not read the book in full. While they are realistic to the setting, all those long names would be hard to remember! To the author's credit, I found no errors in the bit I read. I could find no issues to complain about. The official OBC reviewer was suitably impressed and gave a perfect rating to the book. Maybe I will wait for the movie.

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 4:59 am by Manang Muyang.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

evraealtana

I have previously read another book later in this series and enjoyed it; I would anticipate enjoying this one as well, particularly since it is the first of the series and therefore allows a more thorough introduction to the characters. I loved the inclusion of the glossary at the beginning of the book rather than the end; it was nice to be reminded that the glossary exists, so that I will remember it when the names and places inevitably become confusing later. The hunting trip felt authentic, particularly with respect to Lord Hani's affection for the ducks he watches every day, his sorrow at their having been sacrificed, and his helplessness to protect them in the face of his diplomatic duty. The official OBC reviewer complained that there are modern idioms included, but I found none in the sample. I don't think I will mind them, though, when I come across them, since the book is written in English which also didn't exist in 1350 BC, so some artistic license is to be expected. Overall, I can't think of anything I didn't like in the sample. I will continue reading the book, as always, because I am a fan of the author's work. I found no errors in the first ten pages.

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 4:43 am by evraealtana.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Sanju Lali

I could not guess anything about this book from its cover and its title because "Bird in a Snare" meant many things to me. So, I considered reading the official review of this book to know its contents. The official review gave me the idea that this book explores one of the most turbulent times in Egyptian history when the worship of multiple gods was criminalized. This idea piqued my interest to sample the book. After reading the first ten pages, I realized that this book is not professionally edited because I found some grammatical errors in the sample. For example, the sentence, "Abdi-ashirta nodded thoughtfully, casting his eyes around for a last look...". The sentence could have been, "Abdi-ashirta nodded thoughtfully, casting his eyes around for the last look... ". The thing l liked the most is the glimpse of royal treatment that Abdi-ashirta received while dining with Hani's family. I liked the world-building around the historical facts. My suggestion to the author would be to go for a round of professional editing and make it easier to read. Anyway, I am happy with this book for its captivating story-line. After looking at all these aspects, I decided to purchase and read this book today.

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 4:04 am by Sanju Lali.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Ann Ogochukwu

Because I'm a historical fiction enthusiast and the title and cover page of this book intrigued me, I would have easily sampled this book outside this program.

But having read the sample, I'm not so eager to read the book. The sample started with some long backstory on the characters, which I didn't understand easily, and by the time the main story kicked off, I had lost my interest in the book. From the OBC review, I guess the book turns out interesting, but the bit I read didn't interest me. I also found the names confusing, but this is most likely because I've had no previous contact with Egyptian culture.

I believe this book was professionally edited, although I noticed one error, a missing comma, in the first sentence of the first chapter: "Beneath the prow of the little reed boats(,) slipped the water..."

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 3:55 am by Ann Ogochukwu.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Vickie Noel

This book's title is captivating, but I can't make much out of the cover. Nonetheless, I may have attempted to read it outside the program. After reading the sample, my opinion didn't change. I enjoyed the author's descriptive writing style; it's one of those types that encourages my reading story narrations without getting bored. Sample sentences like, "a hubbub of avian voices resounded from ahead," "the rest of the ducks ascended...betrayed by their cage-bound comrade," and "the caged decoy honked desolately after his flown fellows" all caused me to perfectly picture the scene in my mind while enjoying the rich vocabulary. I also love that Hani is a diplomat, and I look forward to reading how he skillfully maneuvers his way around the people he's assigned to interact with. I'm a bit wary about the similarities between the countless names of characters and places listed in the glossary; I hope they don't end up confusing me and interrupting the story's flow in my head. The book is professionally edited. However, I feel that the sentences, "The sun's coming up, my lord. It's going to be getting hotter" would have been better structured as, "The sun's coming up, my lord; it's going to get hotter." An editor should look into it. I have no recommendations for improvement. I saw an OBC review, but it didn't influence my decision.

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 3:40 am by Vickie Noel.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Rodel Barnachea

Following my going over the title's Amazon page and official OBC review, I decided not to acquire the novel. I do not know much about the culture and history of Ancient Egyptians. I also didn't find myself interested in reading about them. The premise of the historical fiction novel did not fascinate me. Perusing the book's Amazon sample failed to change my mind. I wouldn't purchase it because nothing in its sample convinced me I'd enjoy reading the rest of the story. My initial opinions of the title also play a significant role in my decision not to acquire it. The first ten pages cover a map of the Egyptian Empire, a list of characters, a glossary of Gods, a glossary of terms and places, and some pages of Chapter 1. What I liked most is learning about the different Gods that Ancient Egyptians worshipped. I couldn't identify any errors in the sample and believe the book is professionally edited. I have nothing to suggest to the author.

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 3:09 am by Rodel Barnachea.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Nikolas Farmakis

This is a historical fiction novel set in ancient Egypt. I would not have read this book based on the cover, the title, or the genre, as I do not stories about Egyptian Pharaohs. I will not read this book because it seemed unrealistic and dull, as it had too many mythological elements for my liking. I found no errors in the sample I read, so this book was well-edited. What I liked most about the text was that it was original and unique, as the author's tone was authentic. To improve, the author should make the plot of the text more realistic and closer to a real-life scenario. This book had an Official OnlineBookClub review, which did not influence my decision.

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 3:02 am by Nikolas Farmakis.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Mutai Marshal

The story revolves around Lord Hani. It is based in ancient Egypt, where early civilization existed. Kings were uniquely named and every Egyptian name possessed a meaning. I loved most the simple language deployed, which makes the message fathomable. Since I couldn’t connect with the title and cover page, I couldn’t have read this book without sampling. Having read the OBC review and sampled the first ten pages, I will not buy this book since historical fiction books are not my cup of tea. It seems exceptionally edited. I recommend incorporating a table of content that will guide readers on what to expect in the subsequent chapters.

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 2:50 am by Mutai Marshal.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Sou Hi

The cover is quite beautiful. The official review seems interesting, and Amazon's ratings are generally good. Since the concept is distinctive, I decided to give the book a try. The story begins with a duck hunting between Hani and the hapiru leader, Adi-ashirta. After some achievements, Adi-ashirta dined with Hani and his family, and they discussed many things.

I like the Egyptian concept and the author's historical notes. She also adds some glossaries to introduce the characters and terms used in the book. Unfortunately, the editing is not good, such as the unneeded spaces or the inconsistent capitalization format. I would suggest another round of proofreading. I prefer an error-free version, so I won't buy this.

Error example: Likewise, all the kings and commissioners of Kharu with whom Hani deals in our story and Lords Ptah-hotep, Yanakh-amu, and Yapakh-addi are real, although the relationships and personalities given them in the book are fictitious. -> I think it should be [given to them in the book]

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 2:34 am by Sou Hi.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Annelore Trujillo

I would not have sampled this book based on the genre, blurb, OBC review, cover, and title. I don’t usually read historical fiction or books that are a part of a series. After reading the first ten pages, I won’t be finishing this book. I did like that the book was introduced with a map, a glossary and a list of characters. This was a helpful introduction. However, I didn’t like the descriptions of the women in the book. I understand that the naked serving women are part of the time period and add to the story, but the description of them and other women in detail wasn’t necessary. This could use improvement. The book did seem to be professionally edited.

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 1:28 am by Annelore Trujillo.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Mary WhiteFace

Without the first ten program I would not have wanted to read an historical fiction, murder mystery set in ancient Egypt. Reading the first ten pages did not change my mind. The OnlineBookClub review did not influence my decision.

The book seemed to be professionally edited. I have no suggestions for improvements. The part I liked best was when Hani apologized to the ducks after taking Abdi-ashirta hunting. "I’m sorry, friend ducks, he said silently. Your sacrifice will serve the king (location 535)."

The narrative was well-written and easy to envision, but I didn't feel motivated to continue reading after the first ten pages. I will not be reading the whole book.

First Ten review added on March 23, 2021, at 12:07 am by Mary WhiteFace.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Jeremie Mondejar

The title and the cover photo make me curious. When I sample the book, it's a historical fiction account of ancient Egypt. I like the character reference before the story begins, however, I will not finish reading this book because the names and places mentioned are quite a tongue twister for me. I don't like too many characters because it makes me confuse. Though the sample has OBC review, it doesn't affect my decision. The sample looks well-written, and I don't notice any errors. The book has nothing to improve while I'm sampling it.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 11:03 pm by Jeremie Mondejar.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Kaitlyn Canedy

I likely wouldn't have read the sample of Bird in a Snare if it wasn't the OnlineBookClub's book of the day. I am not into historical fiction books, especially ones that include murder. Because of this, I had already decided that I was not going to finish this book even before reading the official OnlineBookClub review. I found the glossary of terms at the beginning helpful and informative; this will be an easy reference point for readers if they forget who or what something is. There were no obvious grammatical errors, and I can think of no improvements. Readers that like historical fiction books with murder involved may like what this book is about.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 10:02 pm by Kaitlyn Canedy.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Gabrielle Sigaki

Bird in a Snare by N.L. Holmes is a historical fiction novel that brings Egyptian history and culture. If I didn't sample this book, I wouldn't read it based on its Official OnlineBookClub review because political novels don't interest me. After sampling it, I didn't change my mind, and I won't read the entire book because of the reason I stated before. However, the book seems professionally edited, there's nothing to be improved in it, and I liked the fact that the author brought a glossary and a map to help the readers to situate in the story with ease.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 8:25 pm by Gabrielle Sigaki.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

MsH2k

Based on the blurb, I would not have sampled this book if I were not part of this program. I’m not that interested in Egyptian history, and it seemed like the book was very detailed. The sample pages reinforced my assumption about this book. I did not connect with the writing style. I had to reread sentences to parse them correctly, and sometimes I wasn’t sure if I interpreted them right. All the names in the glossary at the beginning were overwhelming. There seemed to be too many characters for me to keep track of reading this book. I will not buy it.

I did not notice any grammatical errors in the sample pages, but most of the pages were glossary entries.
Neither the OnlineBookClub review nor any other source had any bearing on my decision not to buy this book. A suggestion for improvement would be to move the glossary to the end of the book so that it’s not so overwhelming at the beginning.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 7:26 pm by MsH2k.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

xsquare

I’m not really a fan of historical fiction, so I wouldn’t have sampled the book based on the cover, title and blurb. The official OBC review did not convince me. I like the inclusion of the map at the start of the book as well as the glossary of characters. The author also has a incredibly vivid writing style which is evident from the very first chapter – I could picture the scene on the Great River very clearly. I did not see any typos, and I don’t think that there was anything the author could have done better. However, historical fiction doesn’t interest me, and I didn’t really find the first ten pages compelling enough to sway me from my initial decision: I won’t be reading the rest of the book.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 5:44 pm by xsquare.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Rayah Raouf

I would have chosen to sample the book because of the cover. It struck out to me immediately. The reviews are also mostly positive which I appreciate. I will not buy and read the whole book. I am interested in ancient Egypt, but I do not want to go into a new series. Reading the first ten pages made the book sound interesting, but I had to reread a few parts to understand. Also, I don’t usually read historical fiction. I noticed no grammatical errors in the sample. There were grammatical errors in the speech, but that was intentional. Therefore, the book seems to be professionally edited. I liked the map included at the start. I also really appreciated the glossary was located at the beginning. You can look through the words before reading the book. I cannot think of any improvements to be made. There was an official review, and it did affect my decision. I was on the fence for a while but decided not to buy the book.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 11:36 am by Rayah Raouf.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Scerakor

After reviewing the title, genre, cover, blurb, and review of this book, I might have read this book. I love books that take place in Ancient Egypt and the premise behind this one sounds exciting. After reading the first ten pages I didn't change my mind and therefore will be buying and reading the rest of this book eventually. I liked how the sample that I read was able to both introduce the reader to the characters and instruct the reader. For example, when Hani wondered which language Abdi-ashirta and Aper-el would speak, the author both introduces us to details of the character's past as well as teach us some Egyptian geography/history. Although the book looked well written and edited, there was one thing I would have changed from the sample I read. Although probably accurate, I got annoyed at the copious amounts of hyphenated names throughout the book. I think that, in order to help the readability, these could have been reduced slightly. There was an official OBC review, but it did not affect my decision at all.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 11:08 am by Scerakor.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Howlan

I like reading historical fiction so I was very interested in reading this book after reading the Official OBC review. The first ten pages introduce Hani an Egyptian diplomat serving Abdir-ashirta, the haripu leader. Hani entertained him with a fowling party and invited him to dinner. In the first ten pages, we got to know Hani both as a family man and as a diplomat. We got to see the haripu leader and got a clue about his ambitions through the eyes of Hani. The plot is fast-paced and easy to understand. I like the story and the character of Hani is likable. The first ten pages are interesting and I am going to buy and read this book eventually as I am interested in this story. No typos were found in the first ten pages. I found nothing to improve in the first ten pages. The Official OBC Review is present, and the reviewer rates it highly.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 10:45 am by Howlan.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Diana Lowery

I would not have been interested in this book based on the title, and since the bird on the cover looked hieroglyphic, I was even less interested. The blurb did not capture my attention either. The review mentioned religious reform and ancient Egyptian history, which lessened my interest even further. I liked the writing style of the first chapter, but the tedious glossary was a complete turn-off. I did not see any errors. My suggestion to the author is to put the glossary in its proper place at the end of the book, so the reader is introduced to the descriptive narrative sooner. I will not finish reading this book because I dislike characters who have long hyphenated names.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 9:52 am by Diana Lowery.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Mvictoria

After reading the online book club review and the summary, I thought I would be very interested in this book. After reading the first ten pages, I don’t think it’s for me. I found no errors, but I would recommend adding links to the words like “hapier” that people may not know. There is a glossary at the beginning of the book, but I found myself switching back and forth and found it difficult. This is the main reason I will not read this book: the Egyptian names and words that I do not understand. The plot was starting to get good and I can see why this book was reviewed with a perfect score. I liked the story, but struggled with the words.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 9:30 am by Mvictoria.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Catherine Hsu

The cover for this is so mysterious and beautiful, I'd definitely have read it before I read the sample! This was such an intriguing story that combined political fiction, family life, and history, and I even really liked looking at the map at the start. I also really enjoyed the addition of thoughts in italics, which really let me get inside the mind of the character, whether it was to read about their suspicions for someone else or to give us some context about a backstory. Ultimately, the world-building is so good so far and I'm really interested in where this story will go. It was professionally edited. The official review didn't affect my decision.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 5:19 am by Catherine Hsu.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Justine Ocsebio

I wouldn’t have sampled the book based on the genre, as I’m not typically into historical fiction. In the sample, I like the bits of information the author shares about ancient Egypt. I learned that Egyptian names were associated with the names of the gods. I also discovered that Egyptian marriage had no intricate and cumbersome ceremonies. While I disliked nothing, I will not be reading the whole book. The premise didn’t appeal to my taste. I also learned from the official review that the story was heavy on politics. It also discouraged me from reading the whole book. The text is well edited, and I didn’t see anything that needed improvement.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 5:06 am by Justine Ocsebio.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

gen_g

Based on the title and cover, it seems like a mystery, which I am not in the market for; hence, I would not have sampled it. I have also come across a positive OBC review of the book, but this would not have changed my decision not to sample, since this book does not belong to a genre that I am looking for. After sampling, there are a couple of errors present. For example, at 1% in the sample, there is a missing preposition "for" in "...known to have reigned (for) seventeen...". I suggest more editing. However, I appreciate that the author chose to give a short introduction/overview of the book; this will help the reader to better understand the author's reasons for writing the book. To illustrate, we learn that Lord Hani, the protagonist, is a historical figure, and his travels as a royal emissary were actually recorded in what historians know today as the Amarna Letters. The letters were mainly written in Akkadian, which is the diplomatic language of the time. This resulted in a bastardisation of the Egyptian names found there, which is presumably due to the Semitic pronunciation. However, I will not be buying the book today, as I am not in the market for mystery fiction.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 3:48 am by gen_g.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

J_odoyo

Bird in a Snare by N.L. Holmes is an engrossing historical fiction that seems to have been well written. I could have bought this book because I love well-written historical fiction, and this is one of such. I loved the book’s cover page (the design was so creative and attractive), and the title was also relevant and attractive. I liked the author’s description on the Amazon website; it was precise and informative enough to allow for an accurate guess of what to expect in the book. Its storyline is gripping and well written. The OnlineBookClub review gave insight into what the book entails. I didn’t find any error (in the pages I've read), and I would say the book seemed to have been professionally edited. I was engaged from the first page as the author gives this ancient story, taking place during the New Kingdom period—around 1350 BCE. Chapter one narrates the story of Hani, a unique man in Kent, well trained in theology but doesn't like hunting. However, he loves birds. He somehow enjoys fowling along with his friends with their caged bird. I liked that the author provided a list of characters in this book along with some information about them. However, I didn't like the difficult-to-remember names of some characters. The story is promising, and I can’t stop guessing what is next. Sincerely, I wouldn't recommend anything for the improvement of this book. Having read the sample and the OnlineBookClub review, I’m not going to finish reading this book because I think the story will be too complex (due to its ancient nature) for me to enjoy.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 3:43 am by J_odoyo.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Shrabastee Chakraborty

The title and the cover together made an intriguing front. The official OBC review rated it a full 4 stars. Based on the review and the genre, I felt compelled to read this book. I failed to find any error in the first ten pages. They consisted of a note by the author, where they carefully discussed which points are based on actual facts and where they had taken liberties. A list of the characters followed. I loved the clear declaration of the premise and the actual background. I didn't find anything that might need improvement. Based on my experience, I would read the book.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 1:23 am by Shrabastee Chakraborty.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Lucille27

Based on the cover, I think I would have chosen to see more about this book. It looks mysterious and professional. I was intrigued. The Online Book Club review was very detailed and gave a very positive image of the book. It is a historical fiction, but it also gives a very interesting literary proposal. I am a fan of these stories, so I was eager to read the sample. I think it is professionally edited. Something I really liked is that it includes a glossary of names and an introduction that explains the historical background of the fiction. This was nice. I appreciate it. I think the writing style is very easy to follow, yet it is not boring. I want to keep reading more about this, so I do not think I would change anything. Definitely, this was a yes for me.

First Ten review added on March 22, 2021, at 12:11 am by Lucille27.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

CrescentMoon

After reading the blurb, I wouldn't pick this book up because I don't tend to read historical fiction that much and the premise didn't give much away so I'm not too sure what the book is about. After reading the first ten pages, I did spot a few spelling and grammar errors. In chapter one, "Beneath the prow of the little reed boats slipped the water, as bright as colored glass..." I'm really not sure what this sentence means. I'm guessing the "bright as colored glass" refers to the water under the boat but the verb "slipped" does not fit well here. I think the sentence should be written more clearly. What I liked best about the book so far was the descriptions. I could easily picture the scenery and imagine Hani traveling with his companion in the boat. I could even smell the air he was breathing so I thought the author did a great job describing the scenes. I also appreciated the list of characters and glossary in the beginning. The only suggestion I have for improvement is to fix the errors. There was an onlinebookclub review, but the sample did not catch my attention enough so I won't be reading the rest.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 11:58 pm by CrescentMoon.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Verna Coy

The cover of this book is striking and interested me at first. However, I am not drawn to mysteries written during the time of ancient Egypt so I don’t plan to buy the book. That said, I did find this book to be well-researched, and I appreciated that as I read the sample. The character list and glossary of terms will also be invaluable assets to readers as they enjoy this book. What I liked the most was how the book featured a map at the beginning. It seemed to set the mood for the era of the story. I saw no need for improvement on what I read today. It seemed professionally edited and presents itself well to readers. I enjoyed the Online Book Club review and the insights it offered regarding this 4-star book.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 11:50 pm by Verna Coy.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Jsovermyer

The artwork is interesting, but the title is confusing. The cover art and title do not tell me what kind of book this is. I would not buy it from the cover alone. The official reviewer liked this book and gave it a high rating. I found no spelling or grammatical errors and believe it has been professionally edited. The author is very descriptive, setting the scene of the duck hunt. You can vividly picture it in your mind from the writing. I had a hard time with the long character names. Many were so similar, I got them confused. I appreciated the glossary added to the front, but it breaks up the flow of the story when you have to constantly refer to it. I don't like to work that hard when I am reading. I will not be finishing this book.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 10:44 pm by Jsovermyer.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Theresa Moffitt

I was attracted to the cover of this book. The title is interesting and the cover art is simplistic and eye-catching. The cover also tells me that this is a mystery story and I enjoy mysteries, so I would have picked this book up based on the cover alone. The Online Book Club review was very positive for this book and gave it a rating of 4 out of 4 stars. I didn’t read an additional customer review. The ONC review increased my interest in reading this book. The first ten pages were interesting. I especially liked the organization of the first ten pages. The book includes a map, a list of characters and a glossary before the story. This will be beneficial to readers. The story begins with the character of Hani. He has a foreign visitor with him and is taking him on a duck hunt. Hani does not enjoy hunting but his guest does, so he is taking him on a hunting trip. Hani admits it is hypocritical of him to enjoy eating duck but be against hunting duck. He seems like an interesting character. I didn’t see any errors in the first ten pages, so I believe the book was professionally edited. I also didn’t see any area that the author could improve upon. Since the story seems interesting and I enjoy the author’s writing style, I will finish reading this book.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 9:14 pm by Theresa Moffitt.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Kelyn

Even if I had not been a member of this program, it is almost certain that this book's genre(s) would have ensured that I did not pick it up. I am not a fan of either historical fiction or mysteries. Given that this book is both, the title, cover, and author would not have enticed me to give it a look. The blurb gave an excellent rundown of the book's plot and succeeded in making me slightly curious. There were many customer reviews on the Amazon site. This included a snippet from this program's review which was quite complimentary. Other customer reviews were varied, but tended toward the positive. This gave a good impression going into the sample. There is one thing about the sample that I particularly disliked. Fully the first quarter was not even part of the story, it was basically a history lesson on Egypt and Akhenatin's rule followed by a glossary. I do not read history lesson's for pleasure. I feel that somehow working that information into a story format would have been much more conducive to having reader's continue with the book. Honestly, if I had not been reading for this program, I would have given up around the third page and never even gotten to the story itself. Once I finally arrived at the story, I found the writing smooth and the characters engaging. I smiled when we were told that Hani's son's name meant "monkey" and had to wonder how the boy himself felt about that! Despite my engagement with the characters, the fact remained that the book was both a mystery and historical fiction (with heavy focus on the 'history' part). Given that these are not genre's I enjoy. I decided not to continue reading the book. The book seemed well-edited. I found no 'countable' errors that could not be directly attributed to the author's writing style/choice.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 8:11 pm by Kelyn.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Stephanie Runyon

The cover and title are tastefully done. I would not have sampled this book based on the historical fiction genre. The history and glossary were beneficial in understanding what was being discussed. I see two possible conspiracies. The King not wanting to make Abdi-Ashirta a vassal so that Kheta acting aggressively could be met without a major loss; this could cause Abdi-Ashirta to directly attack Kheta to gain favor. The second, Abdi-Ashirta could turn on the King and then Rib-addi could act on the behalf of the kingdom and make an example of him as an outlaw. I can see where Hani had to be careful and observe the actions of each leader. If he said anything that seemed offensive, he was risking his own life. The book appears to be professionally edited and no improvements come to mind. The OBC review does not influence my decision to pass on this story. I am not a fan of historical fiction and this book doesn't hold my attention. Readers that are interested in Egyptian history would appreciate this novel for its accuracy coupled with a fictional tale.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 8:03 pm by Stephanie Runyon.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Kajori Sheryl Paul

'Bird in a Snare' is a historical fiction. It is written by N.L. Holmes. The story begins around 1350 BC. It is set in Ancient Egypt during the era known as New Kingdom. The book revolves around Lord Hani, a diplomat. Hani was accompanying Abdi-ahshirta, a foreign visitor. They were on a hunting trip. Hani's task was to observe Abdi-ashirta who hoped to be recognized as a vassal king. I liked the relationship between Hani and his family. His banter with his father was sweet. There was nothing that could be improved. It could have been "..replacing with Aten the Theban gods Amen-ra.." instead of "..replacing with the Aten the Theban gods Amen-ra.." This may be considered as a stylistic error. Hence, I think that the editing is good. The title and cover goes with the theme of the book. The OBC review and the Amazon reviews were all appreciative. I will read this book as I like reading historical books. Also I would like to know Hani's story.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 7:07 pm by Kajori Sheryl Paul.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Timothy Rucinski

Although the Official Review was nicely done and representative of the section that I read, and the cover quite appealing, I won't be reading this book. Fiction representing historical Egypt is not a genre that I enjoy, going all the way back to when I tried and failed, to read Mailer's "Ancient Evenings." However, what I liked the most was the author's skill of beautifully describing the environment in which the story takes place. There isn't anything about his book that I disliked other than the subject matter. I have no suggestions for improvement and I believe the book was professionally edited as I found no errors.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 6:47 pm by Timothy Rucinski.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Mariana Figueira

Before reading the first pages, I was mildly interested in the book based on the genre, because I like historical fiction, though I haven't read many books set in Ancient Egypt. After reading the sample, I know I won't be reading the book because I didn't find anything that got my attention. Based on the author's notes, it seems there was a lot of research behind this book, and I like the presence of a glossary; those were the things I liked the most. I didn't see anything that needed improvement, though I felt the novel was too slow-paced for my taste. It seems this book is professionally edited and has an official Online BookCLub review.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 4:40 pm by Mariana Figueira.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Laura Ungureanu

I was amazed by this beautiful cover and the intriguing title. The cover looks very Egyptian. I'm attracted to historical fiction books, so I was looking forward to checking this one out. I didn't feel the need to consult the OBC review because I wanted to see for myself first. The first pages left me with a good impression. I always like to stop by and admire a well-crafted map. I got bored reading the historical details, but I'm surprised that the author managed to simplify them. I know that Egyptian history can be confusing, but the author made everything clearer. I also enjoyed the lyrical way the author described nature. I think the glossaries should've been at the end of the book. Because they occupied such a large space, I didn't get to make a proper impression on the actual book. Upon further reading the Amazon description, I changed my mind about this book. I didn't think that the mystery will play such a big part in the book, but this makes me want to back down. Since I'm not a fan of mystery crimes, I won't continue reading this book.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 4:25 pm by Laura Ungureanu.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Kirsi Cultrera

This book seemed like one of great interest to me. I love historical fiction, and ancient Egypt is fascinating. I am sure I would’ve checked this book out under any given circumstances. I immediately fell in love with the most charming personality of Hani. I liked the author’s lively way of describing him, as well as the other characters introduced to the reader. I also loved the idea of placing a mystery novel in such unique surroundings. As far as I can say, the editing seemed to be on a professional level. I did not find anything to dislike from this book. However, the Egyptian words for names, places, and different gods were somewhat challenging to follow. At the given moment, I lack the patience to read a book that requires some concentration and studying. However, I would not call this a fault for this book. Reading the Official OnlineBookClub review confirmed that this would most likely be a great read. Maybe I’ll come back to this book another time, but for the moment, I leave it for other readers to explore.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 4:03 pm by Kirsi Cultrera.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Ari Martinez

If it wasn't for the First Ten program, I wouldn't sample this book based on its title, cover, or Official OnlineBookClub review because I am not interested in Egyptian history. After reading the sample, I will not be reading the rest of the book because the story did not catch my attention, and the list of characters and Gods in the beginning was a bit overwhelming. My favorite part of the book was the way Hani interacts with Abdi-ashirta because it shows how diplomatic he is. The book seems professionally edited, and I do not think it needs improvement.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 3:58 pm by Ari Martinez.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Emy Katherine

The story is set in ancient Egypt and follows a well-respected diplomat named Lord Hani, who is sent to Syria to solve a murder of a bandit leader. Unfortunately, things get complicated when he realizes he cannot trust anyone, including King Akhenaten. Honestly, I would not have read the book based on the genre. I am not interested in reading historical fiction novels, so neither the sample nor the OBC review changed my mind. I did not feel invested in the story, but I enjoyed the author's descriptive writing style and found the characters relatable. I particularly liked Hani's character; he was an honest, loyal man who deeply loved his wife and was proud of his children. I only found three minor errors that did not disrupt the flow of the story. For example, the interrupter "in fact" should be surrounded by commas in the following sentence: "The vizier of the Lower Kingdom was in fact a prince from somewhere in Djahy." (location 706 of 1053 • 67%) There was nothing that needed to be improved. Undoubtedly, those interested in learning about the history of ancient Egypt will enjoy this story.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 3:55 pm by Emy Katherine.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Chelsy Scherba

I like how the author explains the time period and how Amenhotep changed the religious laws so that he could be the only god Egypt worshiped from now on. She also includes a list of all the characters, which is helpful. The review mentioned the book is easy to get immersed in because the language is more informal. I like that addition too. The cover is also really nicely designed. I like that it resembles a hieroglyphic. The only reason I wouldn’t buy or read this book today is because it’s part of a series and I prefer to read books in order. The editing looks pristine and well-rendered as a book. I have no suggestions to improve this book, since I think it combines history and entertainment very well. I mainly read nonfiction, so I would not have discovered this book without the program.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 3:30 pm by Chelsy Scherba.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

María Andrea Fernández Sepúlveda

The cover evokes effectively the ancient Egyptian culture. The artist who designed it did a great job. The blurb lacks information. I don't know, for example, in what historical period the story takes place. Adding to that the mixed ratings, I wouldn't have chosen to read the book based on my first impressions.
I think it's a bad idea to start with the "Historical Notes and Glossary". I found it interesting, but I'm one of those few people who enjoy history. I found it fascinating to learn about the role of women in ancient Egypt or that the name of the kings meant prayers. But I can see how many readers would drop a book that starts as a history textbook. Once the story in itself started, I think it was a good technique to talk about Hani's love of birds. It must say something about his character and perhaps have even an esoteric meaning. I won't be able to tell because I found the pacing too slow for my taste.
I only found one minor mistake. On the Glossary on position 198, it says "Amen, the Hidden One..." and the "t" is in bold letters. Of course, I don't know if it's intentional, but it doesn't appear so. I would suggest adding a time frame to the blurb and moving the "Historical Notes and Glossary" to the end of the book. The official review didn't change my mind.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 1:54 pm by María Andrea Fernández Sepúlveda.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

AntonelaMaria

If I haven't read this sample through the First Ten program, I wouldn't have read it otherwise. I read historical fiction but not that far in history, plus the blurb is not catching my interest. I like that the author included a glossary of characters, terms, and places at the beginning of the book. The writing and storyline are very dense and detailed oriented. I didn't connect with the writing and the overuse of thesaurus words. Especially the long and complicated names take away my concentration of the storyline. I didn't notice any grammatical errors in the sample. There is an informative Offical Onlinebookclub review. Afterward, I saw that this is a book one in five-book series. However, I wish it had the information of this being a series and if the ending was satisfying. I wouldn't change anything about the book as my critique is subjective. I'm sure the intended audience will appreciate this book.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 12:44 pm by AntonelaMaria.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Sarah_Khan

The cover of this book looks really cool and I also like the title. I would have sampled this even without the First Ten program because I have always been interested in Ancient Egypt. The first few pages seem well edited. I liked the little history lesson given at the beginning of the book, but I do have to admit that the lists of characters, terms, and places were a bit daunting. I can't say I was happy to read about Hani's wife described as an ornament. The OBC review was positive. The reviewer mentioned a few editing mistakes, but not enough to take away a star from the rating. I am excited to learn more about this country at this time period. Therefore, I look forward to reading the rest. I do not have any suggestions for the author.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 12:35 pm by Sarah_Khan.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Bertha Jackson

I have read several books in the “Lord Hani Mystery” series and have never been disappointed. For this reason, I would have checked out this book based on the title and author alone, regardless of the beautiful book cover, genre, blurb, or the customer, editorial, and OnlineBookClub reviews. The first ten pages of the book promise that this book will be just as interesting as the other books in the series. I like the map and glossaries the author provides at the beginning of the book to help the reader understand what they are reading. I did not see any errors or anything I would change in the first ten pages. The book appears to have been edited by a professional editor. I have placed this book on my WTR shelf and will read it in the future.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 12:06 pm by Bertha Jackson.

Do you plan to read the whole book? Yes!

Odette Chace

I like the title and cover of the book. The synopsis on Amazon didn't interest me. Even though I am generally interested in Egyptian history, the description read like a typical political thriller. The official Online Book Club review gave the work a perfect rating of 4 out of 4 stars. However, the reviewer noted that some modern phrases were incorporated in the book that were jarring. I have higher hopes for the book after reading the review, but would probably not sample it if it weren't for this program. The "Historical Notes and Glossary" section was very interesting. I am glad that the author took care to explain to the reader what liberties were taken in the text. The long list of characters with difficult names followed by another glossary was intimidating. I believe the work was professionally edited as I did not notice any errors in the first ten pages. While reading, I had trouble with a few of the names, but not enough that I couldn't follow what was happening in the story. This was my least favorite aspect of the work. I liked Hani's character and his love of birds. Unfortunately, I just wasn't hooked while reading the sample. I don't plan to finish reading the book.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 11:50 am by Odette Chace.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Yvonne Monique

The book cover is beautiful. However, it does not clearly show that Ancient Egypt is the setting for this book. Just because of the book cover, I would have a closer look if I would see this book in a book store. The blurb and OBC review describe perfectly what the book is about and that the events take place in a specific period of Ancient Egypt's history. The historical notes and glossary at the beginning of the book are very helpful and show the thorough research that the author must have done in order to write this book. The sample is well edited as I could not detect any errors. Unfortunately, historical fiction is not one of my favourite genres, and that is the reason why I will not buy this book. As an improvement, I would suggest to mention Ancient Egypt on the book cover. That way, people interested in that subject would know straight away that this is a suitable book for them.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 11:48 am by Yvonne Monique.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

TheMazeRunner

Based on the cover, I would sample this book. I love Egypt and its culture, and that is why I would pick it for sampling. The sample both impressed and didn't impress me. I like that the author provided a list of the characters in the book, but I don't like the amount of characters with very similar names. I got lost while redaing the sample, and that is why this book is not for me. I won't read the rest of it. I came across zero errors, and I am sure this book is edited professionally. I also like the maps of Egypt in the book. This book has the official review. What I would like to improve is the amount of characters.

First Ten review added on March 21, 2021, at 11:43 am by TheMazeRunner.

Do you plan to read the whole book? No

Total ~ 25%

Bird in a Snare earned a score of 25%.

In other words, out of the top-level reviewers who read at least the first 10 pages of this book, 25% plan to read the whole book.

IMPORTANT: Any score over 10% is considered very good. And any score above 0% is acceptable.

Over a million books are published each year. Any given person could not even read .0001% of the books out there. This means readers have to be very selective. Even taking the time to look over reviews and blurbs, let alone read samples, is more time than most readers can afford for most books. The First Ten is a powerful focus group that addresses those issues. It creates a helpful tool for authors, publishers, and other readers.

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The First Ten Focus Group Feedback for Bird in a Snare: The Lord Hani Mysteries, vol. 1

Total ~ 25%

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