Could you date someone who doesn't read?

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laci_baby
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Post by laci_baby »

StephenKingman wrote:
laci_baby wrote:
Stinkin' Fascist wrote:Man Coldf1re, you want to really get to him?

Just stick him in a dang room with Laci and I for a day with nothing but a remote control, an ipod with whatever on it, a bag of chips, ice, a permanent marker, and finger paint...

Mission accomplished.
YES!!! haha.... we have to do it now...
I would run Mike. I really would...
Nah, im a man who will step up to the challenge of being in the same room as you two for hours on end whilst you are armed with markers and pens and i am armed with....well that would be telling now eh :wink:

This 'crazy night' wil work both ways, Laci and Dee. 8)
Ooohhh....Sounds pervy to me... haha...
Fairytales are more than true: not because they tell us dragons exist, but because they tell us dragons can be beaten. -Neil Gaiman
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Jennyfields
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Post by Jennyfields »

My boyfriend reads very little, if ever... and when he does his tastes very greatly from mine, so it doesn't impact our lives too much. I have him reading Harry Potter right now but he isn't too far yet. I don't think it really has an impact on our relationship. The only outcome of his reading I've noticed is when we read the same book and have a difference of opinion. hahaha
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Tralala
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Post by Tralala »

I married someone who didn't read. That's why I divorced him.
Nah...he's not dumb, just not into the reading thing.
Our kids both read a lot, so apparently that's a dominant gene...or maybe I'm just a dominant person. :)
They always talk about how strange it is...going from his bookless place, to mine, where there are books (and cds/shells/rocks/notes/sketches/lyrics/toy rats) on every available surface.
Kilgore-trout
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Post by Kilgore-trout »

I'd prefer someone who read but the thing is I don't tend to be too picky about stuff like that. There's always bound to be some flaw with it. The thing can be though a lot of the time people are idiots when they haven't read since the sixth grade.
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Fran
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Post by Fran »

Kilgore-trout wrote:I'd prefer someone who read but the thing is I don't tend to be too picky about stuff like that. There's always bound to be some flaw with it. The thing can be though a lot of the time people are idiots when they haven't read since the sixth grade.
I don't think it got anything to do with reading :wink:
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Tip the Bottle
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Post by Tip the Bottle »

The last thing I'm thinking about is whether or not the lady I'm pitching woo to is a reader. If someone I'm interested in enjoys reading that's great if not that okay too. Reading is mostly a solitary investment of time and as long as it's understood that this is something I enjoy doing and always try to make time for than everything else is cool. There have been instances in my social life where the woman I was seeing had hobbies I had no interest in other than they were a part of her. When she was doing her hobby I would read or do something else.
"When the give you things, ask yourself why.
When you're grateful to them for giving you the things you should already have anyway, ask yourself why."
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Post by Sophius »

Though I would find a love of reading to be a favorable trait in a girlfriend, it really wouldn't be imperative for a lasting relationship. Generally my conditions are:

Has a good personality, like to have serious discussions
Is very intelligent(the smarter the better)
Isn't hideous(I feel kind of guilty about this one, but I honestly would have a hard time dating a girl hideous girl.) To be honest though, I don't think that the "Hot" females are all that attractive either. I think that majority of that which determines if someone is pretty is in their eyes.
Kilgore-trout
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Post by Kilgore-trout »

Fran wrote:
Kilgore-trout wrote:I'd prefer someone who read but the thing is I don't tend to be too picky about stuff like that. There's always bound to be some flaw with it. The thing can be though a lot of the time people are idiots when they haven't read since the sixth grade.
I don't think it got anything to do with reading :wink:
i don't know I'd like to think the reason I'm the least bit intelligent is because I'm always reading. You don't see a link between reading and knowledge?
:P
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Mairin
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Post by Mairin »

Kilgore-trout wrote:
Fran wrote:
Kilgore-trout wrote:I'd prefer someone who read but the thing is I don't tend to be too picky about stuff like that. There's always bound to be some flaw with it. The thing can be though a lot of the time people are idiots when they haven't read since the sixth grade.
I don't think it got anything to do with reading :wink:
i don't know I'd like to think the reason I'm the least bit intelligent is because I'm always reading. You don't see a link between reading and knowledge?
:P

I think reading can make someone more knowledgeable, but actual intelligence it is hard to say. My husband and I have had many debates on what actually constitutes intelligence. I would love to hear what everyone here thinks it is though.
~I'm so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I'm saying.~ Oscar Wilde
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Fran
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Post by Fran »

Mairin wrote:
Kilgore-trout wrote:
Fran wrote: I don't think it got anything to do with reading :wink:
i don't know I'd like to think the reason I'm the least bit intelligent is because I'm always reading. You don't see a link between reading and knowledge?
:P

I think reading can make someone more knowledgeable, but actual intelligence it is hard to say. My husband and I have had many debates on what actually constitutes intelligence. I would love to hear what everyone here thinks it is though.
I'd be inclined to agree with you Mairin ... many people do tend to confuse knowledge with intelligence in the same way we sometimes confuse data with information.
IMO knowledge is a complilation of facts, skills etc, intelligence on the other hand is the ability to use knowledge or skill in a logical, meaningful and useful way.

My point though was that 'a lot of people are idiots' is IMO a statement of fact & has absolutely nothing to do with whether or not they are readers. Reading in itself will not stop you being an idiot or behaving in an idiotic fashion & that I can say with absolute certaintity. :oops:
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Mairin
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Post by Mairin »

Fran wrote:
Mairin wrote:
Kilgore-trout wrote: i don't know I'd like to think the reason I'm the least bit intelligent is because I'm always reading. You don't see a link between reading and knowledge?
:P

I think reading can make someone more knowledgeable, but actual intelligence it is hard to say. My husband and I have had many debates on what actually constitutes intelligence. I would love to hear what everyone here thinks it is though.
I'd be inclined to agree with you Mairin ... many people do tend to confuse knowledge with intelligence in the same way we sometimes confuse data with information.
IMO knowledge is a complilation of facts, skills etc, intelligence on the other hand is the ability to use knowledge or skill in a logical, meaningful and useful way.

My point though was that 'a lot of people are idiots' is IMO a statement of fact & has absolutely nothing to do with whether or not they are readers. Reading in itself will not stop you being an idiot or behaving in an idiotic fashion & that I can say with absolute certaintity. :oops:
Absolutely Fran. I agree totally that reading does not make one less of an idiot. I know plenty of readers who still behave in idiotic fashions.
~I'm so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I'm saying.~ Oscar Wilde
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GotThatSwing
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Post by GotThatSwing »

^ I agree, reading doesn't determine if someone is an idiot or not. So, I could date someone who is not reading, but not an idiot 8)
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StephenKingman
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Post by StephenKingman »

Pretty much agree with the above posts, you can get a lot of people who are book-smart and have a lot of knowledge from reading books, then you get people who read a lot of books but for some reason dont absorb the knowledge, it gets lost in their brain. But actual intelligence is hard to define, i would personally see intelligence as advanced ability eg engineering, surgeons, physicists etc but others may see intelligence as street smarts or cunning,

Certainly i know many people who have never read a book in their lives but could tie you in knots with their instincts, ability to read people, social skills and their uncanny knowledge of dangerous areas. Then i know a few who have a whole room full of books but not an ounce of common sense or manners or any sense of danger, they take all people at their word and see only good in others.

Personally the worst category of book-intelligence individual for me is the snob- the lecturer who looks down on the common person from his/her ivory tower and proclaims that only one writer, one vision is the way to go and sniffs at those who do not engage in debate or those who do not hungrily agree with everything they say. If i started dating someone who then said that unless i read more books or whatever they read then it was over, i would walk out the door and never see them again. Love is based on personal attributes and not only shared interests. I read because i love it, but i know and respect that there are others who dont read or who dont like horror etc. Live and let live.
You only live once.....so live!
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Tralala
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Post by Tralala »

StephenKingman wrote:
Personally the worst category of book-intelligence individual for me is the snob- the lecturer who looks down on the common person from his/her ivory tower and proclaims that only one writer, one vision is the way to go and sniffs at those who do not engage in debate or those who do not hungrily agree with everything they say.
You just described most of my coworkers. They're the same way with movies, music, and TV. It just seems to be about making other people feel inferior. I don't get it. I'd rather be around folks who have their own opinions. They follow "the" crowd by not following the crowd...if you can follow all that.
Just methinks. YMMV.
BookWorm617
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Post by BookWorm617 »

I am an avid reader, reading at least 3-4 books a week. My husband does not read books however he does lots of internet research. I don't think someone who doesn't read is inherently less intelligent than those that do read. We have amazing deep conversations about lots of things and when I am reading something that I think would interest him I tell him about it and we discuss it. So someone who reads not dating someone because they don't is kind of stupid if you ask me. But hey thats just my opinion.
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