Could you date someone who doesn't read?

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Liza Chulukhadze
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Re: Could you date someone who doesn't read?

Post by Liza Chulukhadze »

My now boyfriend didn't use to read when i met him. He would scrunch his nose when he'd see a book and didn't want to go near it at all. Well with time I tried to get him used to them, trying some comic books at first. I think we are making a progress and it would be a huge deal if he still refused to pick a book up, as talking to him about books he knows nothing about would be a killer. I am also a writer myself, so it means a lot to me.
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Post by MKJWMcB »

Usually not, but as the years have gone by my husbands vision has depleted so much he has a very difficult time reading. So, we got him an iPad and he can adjust the font. It did not help. He is very frustrated about not being able to read and it makes us very sad.
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Tameka P
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Post by Tameka P »

I married someone who doesn't read. We have numerous shared interests (reading is not one). And we have riveting conversations about many other things. When I want to discuss a book, I talk to my friends who like reading as much as I do.
Also, he buys me a lot of books :romance-heartsfade:.
He is trying to read more now. And I've been dabbling in some of his hobbies (gaming etc.) :wink2:
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Anna_Hernandez
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Post by Anna_Hernandez »

Love this question! At one point, I would have agreed with you, I could not get involved with someone who doesn't read (I mean what would we talk about!?).

Lone behold, I am with someone who didn't enjoy reading and could not see the point. He considered it a waste of time. Fortunately for him, he met me :) After three years, we have learned so from each other! He helps me understand the 'real' world point-of-view (something I consider the 'small-minded' world), and I help him understand the 'unimaginable' world (aka the unlimited-potential-to-everything world). We drive each others bonkers but are both open-minded. Thus my new opinion: I would never date a close-minded person.

p.s. His new year resolution is to read 12 books this year!
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Mary Bircher
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Post by Mary Bircher »

Oh gosh. My partner of 17 years has read maybe 2 books ever. I even did his book reports in high school :mrgreen: Honestly, it doesn't bother me. Sometimes I feel like it would be nice to just sit quietly next to each other reading books, but *shrug* I like having my own thing and being the literature expert on our trivia team! Plus, I still tell him about my books! He might not care, but I always tell him about what I'm reading.
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Meghan Sica
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Post by Meghan Sica »

Yes. My husband doesn't read at all. It's not something he has ever been interested in. We are opposites in many aspects. But that works for us. When I was younger I used to believe I needed to find someone who was just like me, but my husband and I have been together for 14 years now. Sometimes you just have to erase everything you think should be and just accept what is.
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Post by Andrea Calderon 1 »

I don't think I could but I've learned that the heart can't choose who to love. Probably if I'm with someone who doesn't read books, I'll turn that person into a library rat. :techie-studyingbrown: :techie-studyingbrown: :techie-studyingbrown:
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Jack King
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Post by Jack King »

Yes absolutely, to a degree I think it is healthy to have depressed hobbies when you’re in a relationship. There should also be shared hobbies and activities as well. My wife very rarely reads a book but we often are doing steerage hobbies together when I’m reading. She is an artist and loves to paint and it is not uncommon for her to paint and me to read sat next to each other. I also sleep much less than her and reading on my phone is very easy to in the evenings or mornings without disturbing her.
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Ben Madeley
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Post by Ben Madeley »

I go through spells of reading a lot of books and then not reading any, so for me it wouldn't be a problem if my partner didn't read much.
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Post by Kemzy5 »

No I can't date someone who doesn't read. You must not be obessed with reading like me but at least be interested in reading. I am attracted to people who love to read and explore their imaginations, it's a huge green flag for me.
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Post by nerudathething »

Yes, but it would depend on the person. It is important to have shared interests and compatible values. If someone doesn't read, but we have other interests and values in common, then it could work.
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Post by anneashford »

I have before... not an experience I want to repeat. Then again, reading isn't everything! I think I could date someone who doesn't read as long as they were passionate about something interesting. The one thing I can't stand is when people have no hobbies at all. For instance, I've been struggling to find my people in university because unfortunately, it seems like no one else cares about anything other than getting wasted every weekend. I know my people are out there somewhere, it's just taking awhile to find them.
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Post by Hannah Hampton »

I certainly could! My boyfriend isn't a huge reader, but I love to tell him all about whatever I'm reading and we have really great discussions about it. He's studying engineering and I'm studying English, so we have two very different mindsets and interests, so we never run out of things to talk about!
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Laura Ismajli
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Post by Laura Ismajli »

Having dated people in the past who hated reading, I have to say that there is certainly a missing element to the relationship. My current partner and I have completely different reading interests; he enjoys self-development and "educational" books, whereas I read purely for pleasure. Despite this, we are still able to discuss our thoughts and feelings about our respective reads with each other, even if we can't necessarily relate. I believe there is just an intrinsic understanding with people who enjoy reading, a sort of life that only comes from between the pages. I just don't think I could have a successful relationship with someone who doesn't understand that. :lol:
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Post by Melissa Katherine »

I have been with my fiancé for almost 8 years. He has never been much of a reader. Sometimes it's hard because I wish I could discuss books with him. However, it doesn't hurt our relationship at all. I've gotten him to read a couple of books, but he has trouble staying focused. We have other things in common, like we enjoy watching tv shows and movies together, so we can still do other things together. We also have things that we do separately. I will read while he plays video games or watches sports. The main thing is to make sure that whoever you're in a relationship with supports you reading. I'm in a bunch of books groups on Facebook, and I've seen people post about their significant other putting them down for reading or even throwing their books away. I could never be with someone like that. Even though my fiancé doesn't enjoy reading like I do, he supports me spending money on books and spending my free time reading.
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