Review of The Unfakeable Code®
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Valentine Nyachoti
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Review of The Unfakeable Code®
[Following is a volunteer review of "The Unfakeable Code®" by Tony Jeton Selimi.]
It’s kind of wild how uncomfortable people get when you start being real with them. I’ve noticed it in everyday conversations—when you answer “How are you?” with anything other than “good,” there’s a visible twitch, a retreat behind the eyes. The Unfakeable Code® doesn’t shy away from this cultural allergy to vulnerability. Tony Jeton Selimi lays it all out: we live in a world where being too honest, too emotional, or too self-aware often gets you labeled as weak, dramatic, or even unstable. But instead of accepting that as a permanent truth, he argues—fiercely, even—that embracing our real selves is the only way to build communities worth living in. And I think he’s right.
The book is essentially a manual for building a life you don’t have to fake your way through. Tony shows how wearing emotional masks might help us blend in but slowly chips away at our identity. What I loved was how he didn’t just talk about personal authenticity in a vacuum—he made it social. The idea that realness isn’t just self-care but community care hit me hard. I hadn’t really considered how being more honest about who I am might give others permission to do the same. That ripple effect, he explains, is how stronger, more emotionally resilient communities are born. Not through sameness. Through shared truth.
I liked the honesty that being unfakeable will likely lose you some relationships—and that’s a good thing for long-term happiness. It was refreshing to hear someone say that without sugarcoating it. There’s no delusion in this book that authenticity will make everyone love you more. In fact, Tony kind of warns you the opposite might happen, especially at first. And honestly? That level of honesty earns my respect. But I did feel something was missing. I disliked that this necessary grieving process (losing relationships) wasn't explored in more depth to help readers prepare emotionally. It’s a big deal, cutting ties with people who’ve known your mask better than they’ve known your soul. I think a few more pages on that pain—what it feels like, how to process it—would have added another layer of emotional safety to the experience.
Even with that, this book felt like a breath of fresh, if slightly sharp, air. It doesn't try to make vulnerability trendy or polished. It shows how messy and brave it actually is. There’s a passage where Tony talks about the cost of pretending, and how pretending slowly builds a wall between us and everyone else. I remember sitting with that line for a while. Because I’ve felt that wall. And reading this book gave me both a hammer and permission to start breaking it down.
So no, it’s not always comfortable to read. And I don’t think it’s meant to be. But it is honest, and it’s necessary. I gave The Unfakeable Code® 5 out of 5 stars, because while it doesn't solve the pain of being real, it does something maybe even more valuable—it makes you believe that being real is worth the pain.
******
The Unfakeable Code®
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon | on iTunes
It’s kind of wild how uncomfortable people get when you start being real with them. I’ve noticed it in everyday conversations—when you answer “How are you?” with anything other than “good,” there’s a visible twitch, a retreat behind the eyes. The Unfakeable Code® doesn’t shy away from this cultural allergy to vulnerability. Tony Jeton Selimi lays it all out: we live in a world where being too honest, too emotional, or too self-aware often gets you labeled as weak, dramatic, or even unstable. But instead of accepting that as a permanent truth, he argues—fiercely, even—that embracing our real selves is the only way to build communities worth living in. And I think he’s right.
The book is essentially a manual for building a life you don’t have to fake your way through. Tony shows how wearing emotional masks might help us blend in but slowly chips away at our identity. What I loved was how he didn’t just talk about personal authenticity in a vacuum—he made it social. The idea that realness isn’t just self-care but community care hit me hard. I hadn’t really considered how being more honest about who I am might give others permission to do the same. That ripple effect, he explains, is how stronger, more emotionally resilient communities are born. Not through sameness. Through shared truth.
I liked the honesty that being unfakeable will likely lose you some relationships—and that’s a good thing for long-term happiness. It was refreshing to hear someone say that without sugarcoating it. There’s no delusion in this book that authenticity will make everyone love you more. In fact, Tony kind of warns you the opposite might happen, especially at first. And honestly? That level of honesty earns my respect. But I did feel something was missing. I disliked that this necessary grieving process (losing relationships) wasn't explored in more depth to help readers prepare emotionally. It’s a big deal, cutting ties with people who’ve known your mask better than they’ve known your soul. I think a few more pages on that pain—what it feels like, how to process it—would have added another layer of emotional safety to the experience.
Even with that, this book felt like a breath of fresh, if slightly sharp, air. It doesn't try to make vulnerability trendy or polished. It shows how messy and brave it actually is. There’s a passage where Tony talks about the cost of pretending, and how pretending slowly builds a wall between us and everyone else. I remember sitting with that line for a while. Because I’ve felt that wall. And reading this book gave me both a hammer and permission to start breaking it down.
So no, it’s not always comfortable to read. And I don’t think it’s meant to be. But it is honest, and it’s necessary. I gave The Unfakeable Code® 5 out of 5 stars, because while it doesn't solve the pain of being real, it does something maybe even more valuable—it makes you believe that being real is worth the pain.
******
The Unfakeable Code®
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon | on iTunes
