Review of Women, Work and Triumph
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David O Okoth
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Review of Women, Work and Triumph
[Following is a volunteer review of "Women, Work and Triumph" by Beverly Gandara.]
Have you ever read a book that says out loud what so many of us have only ever whispered in the privacy of group chats or wine-fueled catch-ups with Women, Work and Triumph is that book. Beverly Gandara. lays bare the tightrope act women walk every day at work—the performance of confidence without arrogance, strength without seeming “too much,” and ambition without stepping on toes. It’s equal parts personal story and cultural diagnosis, and it reads like someone who has lived in the boardroom but hasn’t completely forgotten what it’s like to hesitate before raising your hand.
I remember pausing on a passage where Sandberg explains how a woman giving firm feedback is called “abrasive,” while a man doing the same is “decisive.” It made me think of past evaluations I’d seen (and maybe written myself, embarrassingly), where women were told to work on “tone” while their male peers were praised for being direct. That’s the double bind she talks about: be assertive but not too assertive, speak up but not too much, lead but don’t forget to smile while doing it. Her exploration of this contradiction feels honest and frustrating in equal measure. It doesn’t try to pretend this bind is easy to escape—it just puts it under a microscope and says, Here. This is real. You’re not imagining it.
What I found most compelling, though, was her idea of the “leadership ambition gap.” Not because it’s entirely new, but because of how plainly she lays it out. She doesn’t accuse women of lacking ambition—she shows how that ambition is slowly chipped away by years of subtle messaging, lowered expectations, and quiet discouragement. The story she tells about a young woman who hesitated to take on a challenging role because she was thinking ahead to one day having kids—despite being years away from that possibility—was striking. I’ve seen that exact conversation happen. Hell, I’ve had that conversation in my own head. It hits different when it’s printed on the page.
Still, I think the book sometimes falls into a bit of a trap. In trying to encourage personal agency—lean in, speak up, take your seat at the table—it occasionally downplays just how immovable some of the structural barriers are. I mean, sure, women can advocate for themselves, but what happens when they do and the system simply doesn’t care? Or worse, punishes them for it? Sandberg nods at this, but I felt like it didn’t always get the weight it deserved. It’s not that I disagreed with her—it’s just that, in my opinion, some things aren’t just fixable by being braver or louder. Sometimes the walls are just really thick.
Even with that caveat, I still gave it 5 out of 5 stars. Because this book starts conversations. The kind you’ll carry into meetings, into performance reviews, maybe even into those awkward moments where you find yourself questioning whether you came across too strong—or not strong enough. It’s not perfect. But then again, neither is the world it’s trying to change.
******
Women, Work and Triumph
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon
Have you ever read a book that says out loud what so many of us have only ever whispered in the privacy of group chats or wine-fueled catch-ups with Women, Work and Triumph is that book. Beverly Gandara. lays bare the tightrope act women walk every day at work—the performance of confidence without arrogance, strength without seeming “too much,” and ambition without stepping on toes. It’s equal parts personal story and cultural diagnosis, and it reads like someone who has lived in the boardroom but hasn’t completely forgotten what it’s like to hesitate before raising your hand.
I remember pausing on a passage where Sandberg explains how a woman giving firm feedback is called “abrasive,” while a man doing the same is “decisive.” It made me think of past evaluations I’d seen (and maybe written myself, embarrassingly), where women were told to work on “tone” while their male peers were praised for being direct. That’s the double bind she talks about: be assertive but not too assertive, speak up but not too much, lead but don’t forget to smile while doing it. Her exploration of this contradiction feels honest and frustrating in equal measure. It doesn’t try to pretend this bind is easy to escape—it just puts it under a microscope and says, Here. This is real. You’re not imagining it.
What I found most compelling, though, was her idea of the “leadership ambition gap.” Not because it’s entirely new, but because of how plainly she lays it out. She doesn’t accuse women of lacking ambition—she shows how that ambition is slowly chipped away by years of subtle messaging, lowered expectations, and quiet discouragement. The story she tells about a young woman who hesitated to take on a challenging role because she was thinking ahead to one day having kids—despite being years away from that possibility—was striking. I’ve seen that exact conversation happen. Hell, I’ve had that conversation in my own head. It hits different when it’s printed on the page.
Still, I think the book sometimes falls into a bit of a trap. In trying to encourage personal agency—lean in, speak up, take your seat at the table—it occasionally downplays just how immovable some of the structural barriers are. I mean, sure, women can advocate for themselves, but what happens when they do and the system simply doesn’t care? Or worse, punishes them for it? Sandberg nods at this, but I felt like it didn’t always get the weight it deserved. It’s not that I disagreed with her—it’s just that, in my opinion, some things aren’t just fixable by being braver or louder. Sometimes the walls are just really thick.
Even with that caveat, I still gave it 5 out of 5 stars. Because this book starts conversations. The kind you’ll carry into meetings, into performance reviews, maybe even into those awkward moments where you find yourself questioning whether you came across too strong—or not strong enough. It’s not perfect. But then again, neither is the world it’s trying to change.
******
Women, Work and Triumph
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon
