Review by Yssimnar -- The Cult Next Door
Posted: 18 Jul 2018, 18:35
[Following is a volunteer review of "The Cult Next Door" by Elizabeth R. Burchard, Judith L. Carlone.]
4 out of 4 stars
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The Cult Next Door by Elizabeth R. Burchard, Judith L. Carlone
Telling the true story of her involvement in the George Sharkman cult, the author, Elisabeth, gives a case study depicting how the cult used one’s need for acceptance and significance to keep intelligent, yet gullible, followers engaged. Elisabeth joined the psychological-therapy group led by George Sharkman with her mom. Other women and a couple men joined and were expected to cater to the whims of George without even realizing it. After 20 years, Elizabeth finally recognizes the harm of the Sharkmans and leaves with the help of a friend. Elisabeth now recognizes the cult’s manipulative tactics and warns the reader. Learning the author’s experience, we can consider boundaries that may protect us from controlling manipulation where it may lurk, even within interpersonal relationships.
The story was of interest because I discovered my religion has cult-like tendencies couched in its history. The memoir gives examples of ways the group discouraged members from listening to their instincts. They were expected to defer to group authority, but the cult gave participants the impression they were freely choosing the cult’s agenda. Because all the members were “choosing” the same beliefs and behaviors, it was easy to develop an insider-outsider mentality. This created a sense of belonging within and demonized all people outside the group. I recognize these themes at some churches.
Elizabeth also yearned for purpose and confidence. Although she was obviously manipulated by the cult, George succeeded in providing that purpose and confidence. Because the group is terrible and unhealthy, I had to consider whether we can confidently judge a group by the purpose and confidence it provides. Is it possible that religion also uses a provided sense of purpose as proof of validity? Is this a helpful measure or value?
George was the exclusive authority interpreting his client’s experiences because he was most knowledgeable. If he scared or bullied his followers, he could interpret their adrenaline as evidence of personal growth. He could interpret discomfort as insufficient commitment and the participant’s fault. George’s subjective interpretations led members to express support for the group in ways that he could interpret as a vision or spiritual experience. Because Elizabeth had complete confidence in George, she could relax and defer to his interpretation in every area. She believed she could access every answer because George made it simple. George’s mission was so important and participation so meaningful, lying to protect the image of the group became a necessity. Outsiders may not be ready to understand.
Trigger Warning: sexual abuse -- George would groom his therapy clients or cult followers by glorifying the idea that making uncomfortable choices feel comfortable is vital. He encouraged the members to disrobe, touch him, themselves, and each other to overcome discomfort. This behavior was rewarded and publicly praised while refusal or discomfort was met with public ridicule. While this is an extreme example of abuse, one might reconsider engaging in uncomfortable activities under pressure. George once says, “The worse you feel, the faster you are progressing.”
I fully enjoyed the book giving it 4 out of 4 stars. The specific examples of Elizabeth’s experiences were thought-provoking, and the engaging chronological format of this non-fiction was easy to follow. I didn’t like that I was repeatedly excited about Elizabeth leaving the group before she finally leaves it. For example, she once exclaims she is “free” from the group's control after having a realization about George, but she continues to stay for years longer, still afraid to leave. I didn’t interpret her fear as freedom. Also, I wasn’t always sure if the narration was expressing her thoughts at the time of the events, or if they were her present-day thoughts reflecting on the past. My displeasure in no way warrants the loss of an entire star.
******
The Cult Next Door
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4 out of 4 stars
Share This Review
The Cult Next Door by Elizabeth R. Burchard, Judith L. Carlone
Telling the true story of her involvement in the George Sharkman cult, the author, Elisabeth, gives a case study depicting how the cult used one’s need for acceptance and significance to keep intelligent, yet gullible, followers engaged. Elisabeth joined the psychological-therapy group led by George Sharkman with her mom. Other women and a couple men joined and were expected to cater to the whims of George without even realizing it. After 20 years, Elizabeth finally recognizes the harm of the Sharkmans and leaves with the help of a friend. Elisabeth now recognizes the cult’s manipulative tactics and warns the reader. Learning the author’s experience, we can consider boundaries that may protect us from controlling manipulation where it may lurk, even within interpersonal relationships.
The story was of interest because I discovered my religion has cult-like tendencies couched in its history. The memoir gives examples of ways the group discouraged members from listening to their instincts. They were expected to defer to group authority, but the cult gave participants the impression they were freely choosing the cult’s agenda. Because all the members were “choosing” the same beliefs and behaviors, it was easy to develop an insider-outsider mentality. This created a sense of belonging within and demonized all people outside the group. I recognize these themes at some churches.
Elizabeth also yearned for purpose and confidence. Although she was obviously manipulated by the cult, George succeeded in providing that purpose and confidence. Because the group is terrible and unhealthy, I had to consider whether we can confidently judge a group by the purpose and confidence it provides. Is it possible that religion also uses a provided sense of purpose as proof of validity? Is this a helpful measure or value?
George was the exclusive authority interpreting his client’s experiences because he was most knowledgeable. If he scared or bullied his followers, he could interpret their adrenaline as evidence of personal growth. He could interpret discomfort as insufficient commitment and the participant’s fault. George’s subjective interpretations led members to express support for the group in ways that he could interpret as a vision or spiritual experience. Because Elizabeth had complete confidence in George, she could relax and defer to his interpretation in every area. She believed she could access every answer because George made it simple. George’s mission was so important and participation so meaningful, lying to protect the image of the group became a necessity. Outsiders may not be ready to understand.
Trigger Warning: sexual abuse -- George would groom his therapy clients or cult followers by glorifying the idea that making uncomfortable choices feel comfortable is vital. He encouraged the members to disrobe, touch him, themselves, and each other to overcome discomfort. This behavior was rewarded and publicly praised while refusal or discomfort was met with public ridicule. While this is an extreme example of abuse, one might reconsider engaging in uncomfortable activities under pressure. George once says, “The worse you feel, the faster you are progressing.”
I fully enjoyed the book giving it 4 out of 4 stars. The specific examples of Elizabeth’s experiences were thought-provoking, and the engaging chronological format of this non-fiction was easy to follow. I didn’t like that I was repeatedly excited about Elizabeth leaving the group before she finally leaves it. For example, she once exclaims she is “free” from the group's control after having a realization about George, but she continues to stay for years longer, still afraid to leave. I didn’t interpret her fear as freedom. Also, I wasn’t always sure if the narration was expressing her thoughts at the time of the events, or if they were her present-day thoughts reflecting on the past. My displeasure in no way warrants the loss of an entire star.
******
The Cult Next Door
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon
Like Yssimnar's review? Post a comment saying so!