ARA Review by davidmwpowers of Herai

[davidmwpowers]

[Following is an OnlineBookClub.org ARA Review of the book, Herai.]

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5 out of 5 stars

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A Tale of two Worlds — but slow-paced and boring with not much plot or character

Herai is the eponymous youngest daughter of Glant, aged self-appointed ruler of the City. It is thought that she will be his successor. Outside is forbidden, but rules are made to be broken, and the breakers conspire with one of her brothers to take control, by taking control of Herai. Or at least that is Koa’s excuse for taking her to be his bedmate.

Onlookers discuss a vision pivoting on Herai that one is showing the other, a story unfolding in two different worlds, alternate realities, due to the intervention of an "Old One" in one — the question is, who is the Old One using as avatar?

The world Without appears better, at least for Herai and Koa at the start. While the other world is the Better Place, at least in the present view of the Onlooking, Herai is attacked, while coconspirator Monta is tasked by Glant to discover the perpetrator.

There is an excellent concept around the premise of an Old One intervening and seeing the paths with and without the intervention (and this is the main fantasy element), but in neither arc is there a real plot, in neither world are there characters we can invest in: there is not much in the way of description; we are not shown who they are; there is none with a redeeming feature.

The tale was perhaps intended as a literary experiment, but never managed to be a readable exposition, failing in the fantasy, medieval, dystopian, detective, LGBTQ+ and other genre tropes it employed.

The world building is okay, and the writing is generally pretty good, but dialogue is patchy and the structure — jumping around between two worlds and the observers’ grassy noll — is highly confusing.

Each plot seems to meander downhill, with muted sex scenes of different kinds and insinuating overtones in many places. Even the Onlooker shown the visit doesn’t like the story for most of the book, and think’s it’s going too slow and has too much sex: Who am I to argue with an Onlooker? Eventually the Onlooker starts to gain an interest in the story, but as I struggled to the unsatisfactory conclusion, it still failed to draw me in – and the dialogue often irritated.


In so many ways, this is just not my kind of story, and I was finding it too much work trying to keep track of the two relaities, with no real hook to hold me in to either the whodunnit of the Better Place or the whoisit of the Onlookers.

On a more technical front, a speaker on several occasions continues dialogue in a new paragraph without appropriate speech tags or other conventions used (or with misplaced indicators), which makes it confusing to follow. Point of view also changes frequently with only subtle indicators (although the eponymous Herai is 1st person).

In so many ways, this is just not my kind of story, and I was finding it too much work trying to keep track of the two relaities, with no real hook to hold me in to either the whodunnit of the Better Place or the whoisit of the Onlookers.

Others may enjoy the puzzles, and be more tolerant of the meandering plot and the paper thin characters, but I will award it 2 out of 5 stars for the intriguing idea despite its lack of delivery on the promise of the premise, as well as the poor story structure and editing – not to mention the (for me) distasteful characters and themes. For me there was little in the way of redeeming features.

Personally, I would not recommend this book to anyone, and would suggest the author gets some editorial assistance with developmental, sensitivity and technical matters. The second star is a concession that some readers may find it of interest.

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