I'd be the corpse.
I'm about as coordinated as a sloth in a swampy mud puddle, and my public speaking skills rival the cringe of a prepubescent boy talking about feminine hygiene products in front of the female members of congress. Okay, I might be exaggerating. Who could possibly be as cringey as THAT? (Don't answer that)
In all seriousness, if I make myself seem cooler than I really am, I could see myself being the Morality Pet. Not because my morality is better than anyone elese's, but because I like to encourage and support people. Either that, or I'd be the crazy short girl with the big guns- but probably not a berserker, because I'd have about 10 cats to return home to and feed after a long day of fightin' the power. (No, I'm not a crazy cat lady. Why?)