Official Review: Smallbrook by Gary Cann

[npandit]

[Following is the official OnlineBookClub.org review of "Smallbrook" by Gary Cann.]

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Set in the rural English countryside in 1916, Smallbrook is a story revolving around a British sergeant, Nathan Holt, when he is on convalescent leave from fighting in the war, due to significant leg injuries. It takes place in Dalton Combe, a small village in which Nathan lived as a child, until he ran away to join the army (for reasons which are not explained, and are outside even his own understanding). Once arriving in the village, Nathan quickly befriends a barman and his wife, and later finds work helping out on a farm called “Smallbrook” which is owned by the story’s central female protagonist, a young widow named Jenny Tiley. The two fall in love, and the book then details how they deal with certain surprising events.

Smallbrook is relatively easy to read, and the novel follows a coherent trajectory. It’s written professionally, and appears to be moderately researched and well edited. The basic thread of the story held my attention, but not enough to be completely invested in the outcome. There were also a few surprising scenes and developments introduced, but they were not explored to their fullest potential. While the writing itself was fine, as a reader, I felt that there were certain story elements which were lacking. Here are the areas where I think the story could be improved.

• •Theme, Conflict, and Resolution: After reading the whole book, I was left wondering what the point was of the overall story. There was one section where I thought that perhaps the author wished to provide some commentary on the nature of ‘village gossip’ and the evils of ‘judgment’; but this theme was never explored in detail. There were also elements of church-teachings peppered throughout the story, but they were all a bit disconnected, and I didn’t get a sense for what ideas actually drove the novel, or why the plot unraveled in the way that it did. On the whole, this left me feeling disappointed.
  
  There were poignant points in the story where conflicts were introduced, but they seem forced, and sometimes unnecessary. Because the central plot did not seem to lead towards the conflicts, the conflicts seemed random--like say, the sudden introduction of a 'thunderstorm', but without all the characters established enough to given an idea on how they would deal with the 'thunderstorm' or its aftermath. The resolution of the story was also unsatisfying and confusing. I am unsure of the point that the author was trying to make, or why things happened the way they happened. For me as a reader, when the resolution is confusing, the conflict is forced, and the theme is unclear, it makes for unsatisfied reading.
  
  • Depth and Dimensionality: Aside from the minimal physical descriptions provided for each character, and a little bit about their backstories, they don’t behave like multi-dimensional people. When Jenny Tiley is introduced as a character, for example, the narrative goes on to explain in detail all of the actions that she is doing around the farm; focusing very little on what is going on inside her head, aside from briefly giving the background on how she feels ‘lonely’ after her husband was killed in action. Nothing is mentioned of their actual relationship; and we are given no insight into what isolation feels like; only told that it exists. Later in the book, Jenny is described as being “strong minded and independent”, and yet when we meet her for the first time, she is milking a cow, the mantra “pull and squeeze” going through her mind. In a moment which could be used to describe actual thoughts which give insight into her character, we are shown that nothing, apparently, runs through the girl’s head apart from a mindless narration of her repetitive tasks. Throughout the remainder of the story, nothing that Jenny does seems to me to show a “strong minded and independent” character, except for one thing which earns her some village gossip—but why she chooses not to save her reputation—is also never explained.
  
  Sometimes, during scenes that are supposed to be filled with emotion and tension, a flat, emotionless dialogue and thought-pattern is conveyed in the narration. When two characters meet each other after a long time, for example, instead of expressing the multitude of confusing emotions they ought to be feeling, they only focus on each other’s appearances.
  
  Another problem that adds to the characters’ flatness is that they don’t appear to make decisions or have thoughts that should be consistent with their characters. In the beginning pages, when Nathan Holt has just been released from the military hospital, he starts to think about his fellow soldiers who have suffered worse than him but-- “The thought threatened to cast a grey cloud over the day and he dismissed it…”—he dismisses it, just like that! It seems highly unlikely that, having so recently experienced war, he would have been able to so easily ‘dismiss’ memories of his dying or injured friends and colleagues. (We find out, a little too late, that he suffers from nightmares, which makes more sense for his character; but early in the story, he seems too unrealistic in his ability to dismiss thoughts of the war, and simply focus on the day.)
  
  Moreover, as I was reading, I felt that this entire town appears a little too unaffected by the fact that World War I happens to be going on around its borders. While characters do mention the horrors of the war, and the losses they have felt; Nathan himself wonders, near the end of the book, why anyone would need a gun on this “peaceful farm”. If the book had tied in to actual historic things that affected the day-to-day lives of people who lived through the war, it would have felt a little more grounded in reality; but this "peaceful" village seems a little too utopian of a stretch.
  
  While the author does show the inner thoughts of most of the people in the village (sometimes to an unnecessary extent), including antagonists, and everyone seems to have a slightly unique personality (I loved the use of accents); too much effort is placed on trying to ‘create’ an antagonist, and make him less of a sympathetic character.This, again, gives the story less dimension.
  
  • Structure and Pacing: The story follows a chronological order of events, but I think that it could have been much improved if some of the scenes were switched around, creating more sense of urgency and impending conflict--to maintain a faster pacing. Throughout reading the novel, I felt that the narrative focused too much on irrelevant details, and slowed down the pace considerably. (We didn’t need to know, for example, all the details of farm-work that were being done by the characters.)The dream that Nathan has in the middle of the story, (when his character has already been established), if placed in the beginning would have immediately added depth to his character, and excitement to carry the narrative forward.
  
  While reading the story, I had many questions about certain mysteries that are presented about each character's back story. However, those ‘mysteries’ were usually solved within the next paragraph, rather than dragged out to sustain the reader’s interest. With a simple reorganization of scene presentation, this story could have been made gripping and page-turning; but unfortunately in the way that it was presented, it seemed slow. The writing itself also sometimes felt repetitive and too descriptive.

The book is not written badly—it flows properly and has got all the right puzzle pieces in place; but the puzzle pieces are just not put together in the right way to create a multidimensional story. The author demonstrates a knack for throwing surprises at the reader, creating a basic storyline, and writing beautiful descriptions, but unfortunately this talent falls short in the novel’s presentation. The book has potential, because if there were just a few structural tweaks, it would make a fascinating, intriguing read—but in its current state, I have to rate this book a two out of four stars.

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[Scott]

I have not read the book. But I want to say I am impressed with this review. It seems to be an in-depth, well-structured and balanced critique.

[npandit]

Thank you, Scott! I'll try to write more like this in the future. My goal was to try to make it constructive and fair; I hope the author felt as you did, too!

[Harvey2014]

Thank you for the review of my book. I found it both constructive and fair, as you hoped. It also shows you spent the time and effort to read the story properly. I'll make sure I take on board your comments for future work.

[npandit]

Hi Gary,

Thanks for responding. I'm glad I got the chance to read it; and I really look forward to reading more of your work in the future!