Indeed, even for parents, the company they interact with matters. Remember Lotta, had lost her marriage, and Lena didn't have hers intact too. Their relationship was fruitful because Lotta was disciplined and caring. I am sure if Lena was associating herself with a loser, she would not have found the solutions to some of her stressful situations like Joey's demise.Barbie_sidhu wrote: ↑30 Sep 2020, 01:59 Parenting has a direct effect on a child's upbringing. The first lesson always starts at home. So it won't be wrong to say that parenting often affects the future of a child. On the other hand,parenting is often defeated by the effect one's company has.
Are The Parent To Blame?
- Joseph_ngaruiya
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Re: Are The Parent To Blame?
- María Andrea Fernández Sepúlveda
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I couldn't agree more. Honestly, all of our parents made mistakes, to a greater or lesser extent. But adulthood means being accountable for your actions and correcting the possible consequences of these mistakes.Lilyflower-x2 wrote: ↑07 Sep 2020, 01:31Very true Joseph. As adults, we have to take responsibilities of our actions. Parents play a role in developing a child's character but once the child is an adult, they have a choice to be better or worse.Joseph_ngaruiya wrote: ↑05 Sep 2020, 00:05Clarence is the name you forgot. I see you narrowed it down to an individual level. To some point, I'd say everyone is responsible for their own decisions. Okay, parents may also have something to do with it, but you ought to choose how you respond to it. But then, how does a child grow without doing the awful things he/she sees or those that have been taught by their parents?AntonelaMaria wrote: ↑04 Sep 2020, 12:22 Is that what every parent ask themselves all the time. Am I doing okay? Am I making the same mistakes as my parents? Everybody does them. The mistakes I mean. It is hard for me to judge the choices they made. I think Kalaya turned out just fine. You also have Jamal and what is his brother name I forgot, two sons raised by the same parents and in the same environment that turned out differently. Then you have four kids that Lena had that are raised in domestic abused household. Soemtimes you just roll with what you get. I wouldn't put blame on anyone but they certainly had an impact, together with other sources.
- engarl
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I agree with that. Parenting is hard and I think that you can't get through it without making some mistakes. But it seems to be that those parents who are making an active attempt to try every day give that impression to their kids. You don't have to be a perfect parent to make a good impression on your kids. It is unfortunate, however, that the serious mistakes that parents make can be really negative influences as well. Thank goodness for good teachers, neighbors, friends, and leaders that can be there for support when a parent doesn't live up to their responsibilities!Vine001 wrote: ↑24 Sep 2020, 18:51 While everyone is responsible for their own decisions in life I think the life choices of the parents have a direct effect on their children. Parents are role models to their children and thus what they do, their lifestyle, extremely matters. On the other hand a child could be raised by bad parents and still turn out well. Why? This happens when a better person than their parents become their role models. If they don't have that I do think they would unknowingly end up like their parents even when they don't want to.
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Well, my answer is YES. Although Parents are not entirely responsible for their children's behavior; in the first quarter of life, a child will display what you impose in them because they are born without any dirt thoughts.
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Lena is even worse. While Joey comes up as a jerk, Lena also contributed to their sons' doings. Like when she wanted to punish the twins but changed her mind when Joey used her car as a condition. She gave in right away. And she didn't seem to care enough about her kids. As long as she didn't receive calls from the school, she would ignore facts, even when she knew her sons were being bullied or stealing. If she did try to talk and understand her sons' pains, maybe they would respect or trust her more.
In conclusion, none of the parents here truly did their job properly. Families and teachers are usually the only adults who can directly affect the kids' mindsets and behaviors, so most of the responsibility would fall on them.
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You're right. Though it's hard to be a parent, Lena has a point in doing her job, too. Kalayla seems to be a good kid, while her mother is very busy. Own choices have a great impact, I think.AntonelaMaria wrote: ↑04 Sep 2020, 12:22 Is that what every parent ask themselves all the time. Am I doing okay? Am I making the same mistakes as my parents? Everybody does them. The mistakes I mean. It is hard for me to judge the choices they made. I think Kalaya turned out just fine. You also have Jamal and what is his brother name I forgot, two sons raised by the same parents and in the same environment that turned out differently. Then you have four kids that Lena had that are raised in domestic abused household. Soemtimes you just roll with what you get. I wouldn't put blame on anyone but they certainly had an impact, together with other sources.
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One thing in the book I had trouble with was Lena leaving Joey's body for one of her children to find. Yes they were older (in high school, I think?) but that is still so traumatizing. I get that she was abused and that she didn't protect her children enough but I still think that was a terrible thing to do. Wouldn't she want to keep them from seeing his body?