"Motherhood"

Use this forum to discuss the September 2020 Book of the month, " "Kalayla" by Jeannie Nicholas.
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Lucille27
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Re: "Motherhood"

Post by Lucille27 »

As estated on some on the comments below, there is no one correct form of living one's motherhood. However, I think books are a place where we can discuss with a bit more of freedom about this topics that sometimes might be taboo. I say this because, in real life, maybe it is shocking to listen to a mother saying that she feels bad taking care of her children, or that it is a burden. However, in a text we can get this through the thoughts of the characters, like slips nobody else listens to. This is something I find fascinating about this particular text. Another thing, also as mentioned before in this forum, is that the figure of the mother is very analyzed, but the absent fathers are the ones who contribute to the burden of this duty. It changes to have support than not to have it. A lot of social factors can weight on how we live and portray certain roles. Besides, human beings and our nature is that of try and error. Again, maybe more than finding a right way to do this without mistakes, what we should be searching is how to fix it, through telling our stories and voicing out our thoughts. Sometimes that might be by speaking or others through art, such as this book.
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ciecheesemeister
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Post by ciecheesemeister »

I felt that Maureen was trying her very best, but like many single mothers she had little in the way of support. Lena was a caring mother and did the best she could given her horrific circumstances. She does a wonderful thing by helping Kalayla and Maureen, who become a second family for her.
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Fliesie01
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Post by Fliesie01 »

Motherhood is a big responsibility, with a lot of critique and ridicule. There is a lot of pressure on mothers, and they always feel that what they are doing is not good enough and that they need to be perfect. But we all are doing the best we can, and should give ourselves a break.
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Tsholo2030
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Post by Tsholo2030 »

Raising a child is not an easy job to do, more especially if you are doing it on your own. One would raise a child with the mentality of making that child to become a better person in life but yet the child still become something unexpected. Why? It is because sometimes children grow but they still don't realise the great things you do for them. They feel suppressed by the way they are raised and wish to be like other children who are raised by both parents. I always advice single parents that they shouldn't always blame themselves for raising a child who happens to be troublesome. They should just look back to when they were young and compare themselves with their children. At times children inherit most of the characteristics from their parents. They would be doing most of the things that their parents did when they were young. They tend to be very worse. It's best to sit down with your children and tell them more about yourself. Make them realise the mistakes you did and how they affected you. In that way they will definitely try to change as they don't want to end up where you ended.
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Post by Sakura19 »

In my opinion, there is always a great challenge in motherhood.
Raising a child is not a joke and mostly faces some problems especially for single mothers. I think every mother wants the best for her child. The character of Lena who has regret in raising her kids and now wanted to help Maureen raise Kalayla in a right way.
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María Andrea Fernández Sepúlveda
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Post by María Andrea Fernández Sepúlveda »

Allen Cheque wrote: 11 Sep 2020, 13:25 In my opinion, motherhood is always challenging. Generaly, parenting a child is not an easy task and comes with various hurdles and challenges. Almost all parents wish they could have done better in rasing their kids and that's how Lena felt. She regretted how she raised her four and so wanted to help Maureen raise Kalayla the righ way. That was commendable.
I agree. All the moms I know wish they would've done something better in one area or another. My mom, who was totally devoted to me and my sister and was a great mother (if I may say so myself) says she has regrets. I guess it is part of being a mom.
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Post by Cynthia Olyy »

I've heard my Mom ask the same kind of question severally, which makes me understand that mistakes are bound in raising up children. The most important thing is to learn from your mistake and the mistakes of others.
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Misael Carlos
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Post by Misael Carlos »

Maureen may have sacrificed quality time with Kalayla by spending more time at work than at home but one can not fault a mother ‘s deep rooted need to secure her daughter’s future. Sometimes children use this as an excuse for their behavior but the truth is it has something to do with selfishness and narrow-mindedness.
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Post by sk8rgirl28 »

The concept of motherhood in this book is so penetrating throughout the whole story. Maureen has the feeling of constantly not being a good enough mother for Kalayla, while also questioning the choices her own parents made in disowning her. Lena spends so much of the story worrying about what she has done wrong, that she nearly misses what could easily be done to fix it. The most important thing, however, is that she realizes that the only thing to do in her relationship with her two sons is to put forth a larger effort.
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Post by Taiwo_Olawoye »

Maureen experience while raising her children put the urge in her to help other struggling parents expecially single parents. This is commendable but many a times, the environment a child grows up may also influence how they turn out to be.
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Post by Eriny Youssef »

I think a mother's job to raise a child is the most important and yet hardest job there is. At the end of the day, everything (under our control) that happens in our world is a result of decisions made by humans. Producing humans into the society who are good/bad, strong/weak and etcetera is the most critical of all. It's an endeavor that is taken less seriously than it deserves in our modern world.
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Post by Wangai Onyango »

Single motherhood is a very trying experience on both the parent and the child. A father is like the stable rock in the family; he is a foundation. One often finds that children from single parent families are like drifting ships on the stormy seas of life. This happens because they have no father figure to look up to; they have no person in their life to give them direction. As a result, conflicts and tensions are so many in the family and the children often become irresponsible citizens or vagrants at one point or the other in their lives. This is my take on the topic.
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Post by Heidadel »

Motherhood is a gift many women yearn for. It brings the greatest joy when it is implemented succesfully. It can have its challenges as well. For example, in the case of Maureen, who has to work hard to provide for herself and Kalayla, consequently, missing out on spending quality mother-daughter time with her. In Lena's case, it was not easy too. She felt she had failed in mothering her sons. There are many lessons to learn from this book on how to be a good or bad mother. However, the greatest lesson to learn about motherhood is that is it never too late. Kalayla ended up well under Lena's mothering despite the challenging mothering Maureen had earlier exposed her to. Motherhood is not a one-size-fit-all thing, it is a matter of trial and error to find which style best works for you.
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Post by MajestyBooky »

The impact of motherhood on children cannot be understated. Many times a mother fies blind, there is no written rule on how to handle your kids. Yet the repurcussions are inforgiving and in the extreme.
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Post by imet123 »

Raising a child is not easy, you can only do as much as you can and hope for the best. Thinking back over an action is inevitable and it is possible to feel guilt over it.
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