If you could change one thing about the book?

[Snowflake]

If I could change one thing I would include more women as main characters (and more than merely potential love-interests).

This is my thought exactly. I have only read (many) reviews of this novel but that is what comes through the most for me and makes me lose interest in ever actually reading this series.

[Nikolas Farmakis]

I think I would change the plot by making it more original and more exciting. Also, I would remove some of the profane words in the text, which distract the reader from the main story.

[a_r_egerton]

Also, I would remove some of the profane words in the text, which distract the reader from the main story.

I don't mind the profanity as much as I do some of the slang. It sounds too modern for a medieval setting.

[[jade]]

I would have liked for Galen to have either played a larger role in the book, or have been more of a developed character. Since the story is set up for him to be the main protagonist, it seems slightly undeserving for him to play such a large role, yet do almost nothing and mostly exist to be easily manipulated by others. While he is a naïve immigrant, which is understandable, it is highly unlikely that he is completely complacent to do whatever his companions wish to do.

[fancyjg]

I would expound more on the use of magic and give the readers a better background of event. However, it's a good book though was taken aback by the death of Lord Eldus he could have survived to the next sequel, though Voulhire always amazes me. Congrats Tysz for the good work.

[AvidBibliophile]

By far, my least favorite aspect of the book was the discontinuity with time period references. An unnatural blend of details led to inconsistencies with the implied era. For instance, archaic names, medieval lands, lords, ships, castles, candlelight, blacksmiths, silver and gold coins, knights, princes, armor, and kingdoms would suggest a medieval sort of setting (at least to me). Then modern-day slang terms and mentions of things like gymnastics, “daddy issues,” football, hockey rinks, and “tight workout clothes” appear, and I was left beyond perplexed. I would have preferred that all of the MODERN terminology be removed.

[Prudence Emillian]

Even though I really loved how Tysz structured the book as he slowly introduces the readers to the fantasy world he has created, I didn't like how rushed events were at the end. I feel like Lord Eldus still had a lot to uncover and accomplish. His death was rushed and even though it sets the story into motion, I feel as if Tysz abruptly cut Alderman's journey short.

[Krista Ash]

I would have liked for Galen to have either played a larger role in the book, or have been more of a developed character. Since the story is set up for him to be the main protagonist, it seems slightly undeserving for him to play such a large role, yet do almost nothing and mostly exist to be easily manipulated by others. While he is a naïve immigrant, which is understandable, it is highly unlikely that he is completely complacent to do whatever his companions wish to do.

I agree. While Galen being naïve to the customs of Voulhire is understandable, he has survived life in a war-torn country, which makes his complacency and some of his naivety unrealistic.

[Asunshine]

I would have at least put one woman to be either protagonists or antagonist. Because I feel the gender part needed some balance.

[_Bokeh]

What I would cahnge is I'd advance the character of Lord Eldus more,he sounds like a great leader who would have propelled his people forward. I'd also brew some romance between Galen and a sweet but brave girl, although I know that would make it cliche. The author probably had his own reasons for advancing the storyline how he did.

[MariaLivaniou]

Galen appears to be the main character of the series, so if I were allowed to change something, I would give a bit more attention on Galen and his character development. He's too perfect as is. He's generous and grateful to everyone. I wish he was a more interesting character. Other characters are a bit better: Rowan has some spunk, Meldorath is a good guy gone bad... I just find pretty much every other character more interesting than Galen.

Couldn't agree more about that, but I still think that there are a lot of things we don't know about Galen. I don't why, but I find it very hard to believe that someone who has lived all their life in the land of the princes, aka hell on earth, is as innocent and ignorant about the world as he is. War changes things inside you, now either Galan is hiding that kind of pain or the author had something else in mind for him.

[azidy]

I would just want the book to be longer. 150 pages really isn't enough when you have so many characters and perspectives. The rest of the series also features shorter books, which makes me wish that the writer merged them together somehow. 80% of the first book is an introduction to the series which might make potential readers give up on the series without reading the sequel.

[Jabril Miller]

While there are many concepts and characters introduced in this book, not a lot of them get the focus they need to properly stand out (at least, in this singular addition to the series itself alone). Instead, the narrative bounces between settings and descriptions and characters with an energy that makes it hard to settle on any one element in particular, which is more than likely due to the fact that this book is less than 200 pages, and likely attempting to set the scene for the rest of the series... If I could change one thing, it would likely be for the narrative to slow itself down and take the time to properly examine and bring out the full potential of these concepts, even if it meant increasing the page number by double-- there are a lot of concepts here I would love to get to know on a personal level, though it seems I'll have to move on to book two before it all begins to make sense.

[Leyla Ann]

If I could change one thing about the book, I would make Demetrius and Rowan fall in love with each other. Considering both of their characters, I really think they'd make a great couple.

[Nqobile Mashinini Tshabalala]

I would have kept Lord Eldus alive. I feel that his passing was unfair. He had great plans and good intentions. His people would have benefitted greatly.