Everything else could wait...or could it?

Use this forum to discuss the May 2021 Book of the month, "Surviving the Business of Healthcare: Knowledge is Power" by Barbara Galutia Regis PA-C
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Kutoyi Clare
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Re: Everything else could wait...or could it?

Post by Kutoyi Clare »

The writer seems to have a seamless outlook on life where all that matters is her career. She doesn't anticipate any changes or interruptions in her personal life until she herself is diagnosed with cancer. What if it was her husband or one of her children? Did she ever imagine that she or her family may be the patients too? Thus I believe things would have turned out differently if she had taken the time to appreciate other aspects of her life. Though they may not outright say it, your loved ones need you more than you may realize.
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Post by DTamara »

I also think that she is not questioning her work balance per se, simply not taking enough time to look out for herself. Maybe this means she should have taken some of the time spent with her family and friends or at work for self-care, however, you could argue if that is what fills her life, why question it? In any case, I think there is a line that shouldn't be crossed. At some point you have to put yourself first so that you can stick around longer. Many of us keep ignoring that line until something really bad happens, so I think this is a very cautionary tale.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

Kirsi_78 wrote: 07 Jun 2021, 07:43
Ahbed Nadir wrote: 07 Jun 2021, 04:41 A doctor is one of the most important professions in the world and as such people who pursue this career have a great deal resting on their shoulders. It's only fair to assume that they will have a great deal of stress and problems, juggling their career life with their family life and so I feel she did the right thing focusing on her work as she was making an impact on people's lives.
I don’t think it is appropriate to say one profession is more important than others. Of course doctors are important, but what I think is that they could not do their job without other just as important professions. Firstly, somebody had to build the building they are working in. Secondly, somebody has to clean the building. Thirdly, somebody has to provide supplies. And so on. Don’t get me wrong, I do appreciate the work the doctors are doing, but I am just saying they couldn’t do their jobs properly if the other important professionals didn’t do their jobs first.
I agree. Each and every profession is equally important to the world. A person may directly not feel the effect of some professions. But in the occasions when they cannot afford some services then they will realize how important they are.

At the same time being a doctor does not make you immune to the illnesses. So the healthcare workers too have to lookafter their own health.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

Stephanie Elizabeth wrote: 07 Jun 2021, 08:44 Well, this is a great question, but there is no way of knowing. I think that at the moment, caring for her patients and nurturing her career was immensely fulfilling, and I don't think she'd change that. Priorities are unique to each person. I value my health and family more than anything, and I try my best to care for both, but many people value their careers more than anything else.
One has to value one's career and one has to be dedicated for one's career. There is no argument about that. But that does not mean that one can or has to put one's career above everything else. One's career can be important, but it cannot be the most important thing in one's life among his/het own self and the loved ones.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

Sasha_100 wrote: 07 Jun 2021, 13:57 Keeping a balance as much as possible between work, loved ones and time for yourself.

I'm don't believe hustling is everything and while I have big dreams I will never forsake my
mental and physical health and time with loved ones for that.

I'm really don't agree with toxic work culture for that same reason. Just because someone has dreams doesn't mean they can't enjoy anything else in their life.
Dreams are a good thing. It is essential for one's future development. If one has no dreams, he/she will be at same level in every aspect forever.

But achieving your dreams should be done in a healthy way. If not you will achieve your dreams but you will loose your own self as well as many precious moments of your valuable but short life.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

Bernard Udofia wrote: 08 Jun 2021, 01:58
Vishnu Priya B wrote: 01 Jun 2021, 01:47 I've always wondered how much time I have. What if my life ends the next minute? Will I regret it? The fact is I won't if I've lived a happy life. By happy, I don't mean the standards set by society but doing the things that would genuinely make me happy.
Not everyone has the same kind of priorities. For instance, I prioritise my family. Some people give more importance to their career. Likewise, the author found her happiness in caring for her patients. She clearly mentions it was her calling.
My take: prioritise whatever makes you happy. Everything else can wait... Of course!
I agree with you; she found happiness caring for others. This isn't to say that her family wasn't a source of joy for her; the fact that they supported her in her passion I'm sure was a big driving force for her. Having said that, I think we should be more intentional about our own health and situation while we render service to other people. To give your best you have to be your best. If it were me, even though being of service to others makes me happy, my family comes first because without them, I won't be in the frame of mind to help anyone.
She did not abandon her family and at the same time her family was always behind her. She was happy to serve her patients and it made the day for her. But she went too far to serve them while neglecting her own situation which ended up in not so pleasant consequences. It is of no use in wallowing over the past. The condition should have been taken into consideration before it was too late and it could have been for a better service for her patients as well.
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Post by Lisa A Rayburn »

Choosing between work and home life isn't going to stop cancer from occurring. She loves both her family and her medical practice and focuses on what she loves. Cancer doesn't care one way or another. The answer to "which is more important" will be different for everyone for widely varying reasons. If she had focused more on herself, it's possible that the diagnosis would have been made sooner, yes, but it would not have prevented the disease.
Books are my self-medication. 8)
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Post by the_invaded_privacy »

Would I do something different if I knew I could die? Probably no. Even though we try to be secure for the future in all our decisions, we still find ways to make today worth living for. It's an effort in both the points that give us the respective flavors. Ice-cream wouldn't feel the same if the day isn't a bit hot. Besides, the author enjoys both the hot day and the ice cream. The two aren't dependent on each other in her case. Obviously, one could try, but after some time you would understand that it was the day-to-day schedule you followed that made everything worth it.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

Anna Bookowski wrote: 08 Jun 2021, 09:00 Following your passion or "calling" is very important and can be vital for your happiness. People working in health-care are true heros. People who always place well-being of others in the first place have specific kind of personalities, which allows them only to be happy when they feel they did all they could for those who came looking for help to them. It's possible the cancer could go even worse for the author if she'd focused entirely on herself. You never know. And think how many people did she help meanwhile.
What I believe though, is that the family and your close ones is not something that can wait. They won't be there forever, we're all mortals. So when deciding on your priorities, always leave enough time for those most important in your life.
Helping others is not a thing that everyone can do. It needs a special personality and a dedicated mind. Helping others selflessly is a very high situation which only a few will achieve, which definitely achieved by this author. Her service was invaluable. Yet she succumbed to an illness unfortunately. But I too think that she was happy about her life and that was much more important.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

jaym_tan wrote: 08 Jun 2021, 12:06 Our definition of happiness differs from each other. Take the author, for example, she found a sense of purpose and contentment in being a caregiver. If you hate what you are doing then there is no point in doing it. True it might have caused her health. Yet, in the end, it didn't matter to her and carried on with what she loves.
Happiness is subjective. Some find happiness in personal endeavors while some find it in serving others, so did this author. So if someone is happy of what he/she is doing the side effects or the consequences can be merely ignored. But at the same time, being happy at the expense of the happiness of the close loved ones seems like a bit selfish.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

karineyn wrote: 08 Jun 2021, 14:30 this is something only that person can answer as we can’t really understand her inner needs and emotions. For example, if taking care of her patients gives her complete satisfaction, how can we exclude that aspect from her taking care of herself? For me, creating an environment that gives you inner peace and satisfaction is also a way of taking care of yourself. That being said, there could be a balance between the physical care and emotional care. I just think she wouldn’t be happy if she were to completely refrain from working.
She loved her job. There is no argument about that. If she was completely refrained from it she would have gone insane. But caring for one's self can be done without refraining from all the other work that he/she used to do. Only a bit of organization and determination are needed. Seemingly she ignored her condition which ended her up in a grave situation.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

Archaeoptery wrote: 08 Jun 2021, 20:31
Sushan wrote: 08 Jun 2021, 04:22
Archaeoptery wrote: 04 Jun 2021, 17:48 Your first question does not exactly make sense to me. How I see cancer is you can take you steps to avoid it or lessen the risks but in the end that may not matter.
Your second question is something I understand somewhat. To keep your job you can not really do it halfheartedly since depending on it will probably make you lose it (Linking this to me doing the reviews). She was doing something she loved and her husband was in support of it. Should not everyone be supported of someone doing what they love? by rights it looks like she was not doing any harm with her family about it.
I am well aware that certain cancers are unavoidable despite whatever you do. But some cancers actually can be prevented by avoiding certain behaviours. I am not telling that not doing her job in a dutiful manner would have prevented her cancer, but if she took the time to care for that at the earliest stage, it would not have spread up to the level of lymph node, which makes it a time bomb. You can do whatever you love. But first of all you must love your own self.
ummmm. Actually it was caught very early, same thing with my dad.
Cancers are unpredictable. Sometimes even if you catch it early it proves that you are late even at that time. But looking retrospectively at this author's scenario she would have have a better chance of survival.

Yes, she did her job wholeheartedly. But her selfless attitude went a bit too far towards self negligence, and I think that is why she ended up with the bad consequence.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

Hhannahh wrote: 09 Jun 2021, 17:57 I didn't get the impression that she didn't take of herself. She actually mentioned that "I never really was a sunbather, and I used sunscreens most of the time. I have attempted to keep covered up while out in the sun... Despite that, it still got me."
So would a little more care have prevented the cancer? I doubt. But I think a little more care for herself, would have resulted in an earlier diagnosis.
I am pretty sure that she applied sunscreen with the intention of keeping her complexion, but not to avoid getting skin cancer. That is what generally people do whether you are a doctor or not. I agree that she would not have avoided getting it. But she could have taken into consideration the obvious swelling on her arm and taken early treatment, which would have ended her up in a better ground.
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Post by Hhannahh »

Sushan wrote: 25 Jun 2021, 20:36
Hhannahh wrote: 09 Jun 2021, 17:57 I didn't get the impression that she didn't take of herself. She actually mentioned that "I never really was a sunbather, and I used sunscreens most of the time. I have attempted to keep covered up while out in the sun... Despite that, it still got me."
So would a little more care have prevented the cancer? I doubt. But I think a little more care for herself, would have resulted in an earlier diagnosis.
I am pretty sure that she applied sunscreen with the intention of keeping her complexion, but not to avoid getting skin cancer. That is what generally people do whether you are a doctor or not. I agree that she would not have avoided getting it. But she could have taken into consideration the obvious swelling on her arm and taken early treatment, which would have ended her up in a better ground.
Yes, she could have, but she didn't. I believe we all, at some point, have taken something serious for granted. I don't enjoy this blame game going on here.
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Post by Menace Crypto »

I believe that, no scratch that I know that for a fact cos I've witnessed it firsthand with my mom that cancer is unpredictable and unexpected. As for she taking things for granted I don't believe that's the case cos humans are generally wired to live and doing some things in a carefree manner is all part of the living process and should not be counted as taking things for granted.
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