Review by Hjb -- Dying Well by Susan Ducharme Hoben
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Hjb
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- Latest Review: Dying Well by Susan Ducharme Hoben
Review by Hjb -- Dying Well by Susan Ducharme Hoben
[Following is a volunteer review of "Dying Well" by Susan Ducharme Hoben.]
Death and dying is peculiarly fascinating subject. Generally, we fear death and do everything in our power to block the morbid thoughts out. Many of us are desperate not to think about our mortality, about the way we might die. Then there are those of us who can think of nothing else. How old will we be? How will we go? What happens after you die? Is there a big set of pearly gates waiting to welcome us, or will we be sent to the fiery depths? Is it possible that there is simply nothingness, after this dimension?
"Dying Well: Our Journey of Love and Loss" by Susan Ducharme Hoben is, for me, a new take on what happens when your worst fears come to fruition. What happens when the one person you depend on in this world, the one who stood by your side during your brush with death, receives their own death sentence? Charmingly, the book does not dwell on the darker side of death. Considering the book is a telling of the real passing of her husband, Bruce, Susan manages to keep the book light-hearted. She emphasises the importance of family (no matter how far flung across the country you are) and the peace that being able to die on your own terms brings. For me, the book flagged a question in my mind that I usually try to ignore; what would I do if diagnosed with a terminal illness?
Above all else, this book is a love story, spanning over 46 years. When we meet Susan and Bruce, we pick them up at a very uncertain time in their lives. As the story progresses, we are taken back to their early relationship and this really sets up how much the couple values one another, and throughout the book, one thing is abundantly clear; this is true love.
One happy marriage, two kids and two (soon to be four) grandchildren, and one breast cancer battle later we join Susan and Bruce just as Bruce is diagnosed with cancer. This in itself shocks the pair, he is healthy, he is fit, he cannot have cancer! Unfortunately for Bruce, things go from bad to worse. Despite this, Bruce never once shows an ounce of self-pity, and his character comes across beautifully through the story telling. He also never shows an inkling of fear, which is incredible seeing as he was facing his own mortality. His strong sense of self and knowing his own mind puts you at ease. He has accepted his fate, and he is going to do things his way. On her part, Susan is never portrayed as moping. To face the prospect of a life on your own after losing your husband must be absolutely gut wrenching, but Susan handled everything with grace and decorum. Throughout the book, my tears flowed freely and I made sure to hug my loved ones a little tighter.
The story flowed continuously, segmented similar to diary entries. At times, I didn’t think I would be able to continue reading due to the subject matter, but Susan's style of writing made me feel like I owed it to Bruce to read his story and see how his journey concluded.
I rate this book 4 out of 4 stars as I cannot find fault with it. In fact, I am devastated that the subject matter was factual, as the world could do with more men like Bruce. If you are thinking of reading this book, please have tissues to hand!
******
Dying Well
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon | on iTunes
Death and dying is peculiarly fascinating subject. Generally, we fear death and do everything in our power to block the morbid thoughts out. Many of us are desperate not to think about our mortality, about the way we might die. Then there are those of us who can think of nothing else. How old will we be? How will we go? What happens after you die? Is there a big set of pearly gates waiting to welcome us, or will we be sent to the fiery depths? Is it possible that there is simply nothingness, after this dimension?
"Dying Well: Our Journey of Love and Loss" by Susan Ducharme Hoben is, for me, a new take on what happens when your worst fears come to fruition. What happens when the one person you depend on in this world, the one who stood by your side during your brush with death, receives their own death sentence? Charmingly, the book does not dwell on the darker side of death. Considering the book is a telling of the real passing of her husband, Bruce, Susan manages to keep the book light-hearted. She emphasises the importance of family (no matter how far flung across the country you are) and the peace that being able to die on your own terms brings. For me, the book flagged a question in my mind that I usually try to ignore; what would I do if diagnosed with a terminal illness?
Above all else, this book is a love story, spanning over 46 years. When we meet Susan and Bruce, we pick them up at a very uncertain time in their lives. As the story progresses, we are taken back to their early relationship and this really sets up how much the couple values one another, and throughout the book, one thing is abundantly clear; this is true love.
One happy marriage, two kids and two (soon to be four) grandchildren, and one breast cancer battle later we join Susan and Bruce just as Bruce is diagnosed with cancer. This in itself shocks the pair, he is healthy, he is fit, he cannot have cancer! Unfortunately for Bruce, things go from bad to worse. Despite this, Bruce never once shows an ounce of self-pity, and his character comes across beautifully through the story telling. He also never shows an inkling of fear, which is incredible seeing as he was facing his own mortality. His strong sense of self and knowing his own mind puts you at ease. He has accepted his fate, and he is going to do things his way. On her part, Susan is never portrayed as moping. To face the prospect of a life on your own after losing your husband must be absolutely gut wrenching, but Susan handled everything with grace and decorum. Throughout the book, my tears flowed freely and I made sure to hug my loved ones a little tighter.
The story flowed continuously, segmented similar to diary entries. At times, I didn’t think I would be able to continue reading due to the subject matter, but Susan's style of writing made me feel like I owed it to Bruce to read his story and see how his journey concluded.
I rate this book 4 out of 4 stars as I cannot find fault with it. In fact, I am devastated that the subject matter was factual, as the world could do with more men like Bruce. If you are thinking of reading this book, please have tissues to hand!
******
Dying Well
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon | on iTunes
Latest Review: Dying Well by Susan Ducharme Hoben
