Official Review: My son died, how do I go on?

[Melexa]

[Following is an official OnlineBookClub.org review of "My son died, how do I go on?" by Farzana Prior.]

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3 out of 4 stars

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Farzana Prior’s son saw the world as a perfect place, where you do little or nothing and everything good falls at your feet. Thus, he got depressed whenever he faced the slightest difficulty. At the age of 16, Prior’s son was diagnosed with psychosis and depression after a failed attempt at suicide. He was given the much-needed psychiatric and psychological help and had to continually take antidepressants and antipsychotics to lead a life with a semblance of normalcy. When Prior was starting to heave a sigh of relief that her son had begun to embrace life, she receives a call no parent ever wants to receive. Her 22-year-old son had committed suicide.

My son died, how do I go on? by Farzana Prior is a handbook to help grieving parents recover from losing a child. In the prologue, the author recounts the events beginning from her son’s failed suicide attempt and leading up to his death in February 2020. The author narrates how her brilliant son dropped out of school twice because, according to him: “There was no time for computer games and varsity life was ‘study, study, study.’” The author also shares a 9-step account of her grieving stages and how she dealt with each one of them. Finally, she gives recommendations and then instances of how grieving parents have positively impacted the world by ensuring that other parents do not suffer the same fate. An example is the initiation of the ‘Amber Alert’ in the USA after the abduction and murder of 9-year-old Amber.

Being a mother myself, I was drawn to this 16-page book. Though I finished reading it within an hour, I was reeling from the cocktail of emotions it evoked for days. I felt the author’s sorrow when she sat by her son’s corpse and spoke to him for the last time. I saw a mother’s need to hold onto her son’s memories when the author kept a sweater she didn’t wash so that she could smell him every day. I understood her gut-wrenching questions but had no answers to them. I felt the love, understanding, and support of her husband and her family, which helped her heal. This book gave me an insight into the challenges of parenting a depressed and psychotic child.

I like the fact that the author found succor in the stories of parents who lost their children and decided to share hers to help others heal too. I like several things about this book, but above all, these words made a lasting impression on me: “Why did I have to have a child that died young?... But then, I questioned, why not me? Maybe God gave my husband and I this soul to look after for 22 years and 3 months because we won the prize of keeping this child alive the longest.” I stayed on these lines, chewed on them, and felt nothing but respect and admiration for this woman who chose to look at her loss and pain with the lens of positivity.

However, what I did not like about this book is that it was not edited professionally. It contains several grammatical and punctuation errors that I could not ignore. I recommend this book to anyone mourning the loss of a loved one, not just grieving parents. I consider My son died, how do I go on? by Farzana Prior relatable, emotionally gripping, and useful to the targeted audience. However, I rate it a 3 out of 4 stars because of the errors.

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My son died, how do I go on?
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[GianKosi77]

How sad to bury your beloved child. I can imagine the trauma that the author went through. It is a good book. Thank you for reviewing it.

[Tiffany2892]

How sad I’m sorry the author had to go thru this I couldn’t imagine having to bury my child

[Joan642]

This is really heartbreaking, it something no parent deserve to pass through. Am glad the author wrote this book to help grieving parents the courage they need to carry on. Thanks for your insightful review.

[Sou Hi]

Thanks for your meaningful review. Losing a loved one is never an easy fact to accept. I'm glad that Farzana found the strength to stand up and acknowledge the cruel reality.

[Vannaskivt]

As a parent, this would be way too emotional for me to read. I commend this mom for getting her story out there. Thank you for your review.

[Nqobile Mashinini Tshabalala]

I've read two of Farzana's books in the past and it feels like I know her personally. I hope she will find comfort in knowing that she tried her best to help her son. Thanks for the review.

[Ellylion]

Losing a child is an unimaginable tragedy, and this book may become a source of consolation to those who suffer it. Really hope the errors will be fixed soon! Thank you for a great review!

[BellAJoEb]

Excellent review! Much appreciated. With the apt title and your recommendation, I plan to read this book.