Review of Trapped

[Brendan Donaghy]

[Following is an official OnlineBookClub.org review of "Trapped" by Norris Friend.]

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4 out of 4 stars

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In Trapped: A Book of Survival and Freedom, 77-year-old Norris Friend recalls the traumatic years he has spent living with the consequences of emotional and physical abuse experienced at the hands of his father. On top of that, he struggled to accept his own sexual orientation, only talking openly to his mother about being bisexual when he was in his forties. It’s a short book of under 100 pages containing a dozen or so illustrations. Some of the chapters are followed by a page of reflections in which the author picks out lessons learned and points to ponder from the issues he has just raised. The final chapter of the book has recommendations for further reading alongside reviews of some of the books highlighted.

Growing up in Australia just after the Second World War, Norris was a sickly child. He was hospitalized for months with rheumatic fever at the age of 4, but it was the abuse inflicted upon him by his father that caused him to have his first nervous breakdown aged just 8. This abuse continued into adulthood. Norris also had to cope with the awareness that he was attracted to other boys. In a society in which homosexuality was still illegal, this was not something that one could be open about. Additionally, Norris was aware that being gay was against the teachings of his Christian faith. These dual influences forced him down a path of conformity to the extent that, by the age of 30, “I had created a world I just couldn’t live in.” (page 42) The book tells the story of how he came back from this parlous situation by learning to accept himself.

A simple summary of the book risks making it sound like a depressing read. That’s not the full story, however. The passages covering the treatment Norris received from his father are certainly not enjoyable, but I found other aspects of the book uplifting. His relationship with his mother, for example, stands out as a constant stabilizing force all through his life; the book is dedicated to her, his “mentor, protector and friend.” I also found the author’s determination to hold on to his Christian faith both surprising and inspiring. He was a mature adult before he found a measure of self-acceptance. This was mainly due to his belief that his sexuality put him outside the teachings of his faith. Unlike many in his situation, he refused to simply reject a faith that seemed to exclude him. His development of a more liberal understanding of what the Bible teaches (and doesn’t teach) about sexuality was key to this. These parts of the book, written with sincerity and humility, add a spiritual quality to the author’s story.

One aspect of the book that puzzled me was that the title as it appears on the cover and inside page (and as it appears in the first line of this review), differs slightly from the title shown on the running footer, where it becomes Trapped: A Story of Survival and Freedom. This is only a minor point, however, and not something that would cause me to deduct a star.

I am giving this book 4 out of 4 stars. It has been professionally edited, and I found only a few minor errors. The book is aimed at adults. It deals with the author’s early sexual experiences using some explicit language, so it is unsuitable reading material for children or younger teenagers. Readers interested in autobiographies with a spiritual slant may find this of interest.

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Trapped
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[sunny4life]

I love the review, it captures this captivating story beautifully. Would like to have a read.

[Mercy Osmond]

Being emotionally and physically abused is the worst experience one will ever have. I like that the book is just 100 pages. I will add it in my shelve. Thanks for the great review.

[El_limitless]

Emotional and physical abuse are two difficult experiences to go through. I hope Norris Friend heals completely from the effects of that. Great review.