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The author's revealing personal stories about her own struggles show how pervasive the pattern of self-deprivation is in our culture. Focusing on the "shoulds," "oughts" and bowing to others understanding of what our roles are is endemic in our society. Although written for women it is my experience that many, maybe most, men also are washed about by the expectations of family, friends, spouse, or circumstances. They, too, find it difficult to allow their true self to blossom without it wilting under the pressure of others. If you are on a perineal quilt trip whose destination is routinely dictated by your past or present relationships, you need to get out of the "good-girl jail". If this is you, or you know someone who is living under these circumstances, this book can help you or them find "true self". Being centered, knowing who you are, and focusing on your "self" will help you get out of the "good-girl jail" and live a life worthy of living.