Review of Pills and Me
-
- Minimum Wage Millionaire Reader
- Posts: 100
- Joined: 11 Jun 2024, 07:55
- Currently Reading:
- Bookshelf Size: 32
- Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-lal-roni.html
- Latest Review: America: The Obliged by Nathan O'Discin
Review of Pills and Me
Kevin and Megan Murray’s "Pills and Me" is a brutally honest and unflinching memoir that captures the harrowing descent into addiction. Kevin recounts his opioid addiction descent, starting with his first hit of Percocet on the job and eventually leading him to a decade of heroin and fentanyl use. The narrative starts with Kevin’s job, which is physically grueling, and how he finds himself becoming a young father; this necessitates his acceptance of Percocet from a coworker. This seemingly harmless act becomes a never-ending use, as he looks for an escape from everything he feels he has to do and everything that seems to be weighing on him. In 'Dope Sick' and then 'The Merry-Go-Round,' Kevin describes how terrible withdrawal felt to his body and how the cycle of dependency never stopped. His descriptions of sweating, vomiting, desperation, and such come alive.
The relationships that Kevin shares with his family are also discussed in the book. But his father reappears both as a source of support and as a self of Kevin’s internal conflicts. In “What or Who Is to Blame,” we look at how his parents’ divorce, early exposure to conflict, and emotional neglect also made him vulnerable to addiction. Like Kevin's troubled relationship with the mother of his child, Hannah, it also adds another layer of tension and sadness to the story. Megan Murray’s alternate view on things comments on how Kevin’s addiction crippled his family and answers questions of accountability and closure. Kevin’s choices have broader consequences, and her interjections are sparser but more impactful in their reminders. Kevin’s efforts at recovery are at the end of the memoir. In the final chapters, he discusses his feelings about what needed to be changed and the strain of being sober. While he does not shy away from the difficulty of his journey, the story has a carefully optimistic ending and garnishes the idea of the need for perseverance and hope.
One of the strongest sections of the book really is Kevin's raw description of the war addiction wages on your body and your mind. To give an example of what I mean, in the chapter “Dope Sick,” he demolished his graphic representation of sweating, vomiting, and the total desperation to keep the withdrawal. He writes that he wasn’t in control. I also liked that the book doesn’t pull any punches by blaming external circumstances and internal choices. Kevin uses 'What or Who is to Blame' to ponder his family dynamics, his run-in with substances at a young age, and the crushing burden of being such a young father. But he never exonerates himself, saying, “There were a hundred other avenues I could have taken.” Megan’s (sparse, but essential) interjections help to indicate how the ripple of addiction bleeds across families. Her voice keeps Kevin from spiraling: it feels like a tether.
The rawness of the memoir is one of its strengths, but at times it’s a drawback. Some of Kevin’s thoughts start to look repetitive, especially his justifications for continuing to use drugs. For example, to assure himself, he tells himself, 'I can stop at any time,' but these refrain from being repeated. This might be deliberate, maybe as the cyclical repetition of addiction, but there was more impact if condensed. The book is edited well enough, but not without its flaws. A few typos scattered here and there and some paragraphs that could have been tightened. For example, in "Life Changes," the life changes digress into Kevin's messy car; though vivid, it's overly time-consuming considering the importance of the content of the conversation. They aren’t big detractors from the book but prevent it from being a book that is truly polished.
I’m giving it a 4 out of 5-star rating on "Pills and Me." Under the worst circumstances, the book is gripping, raw, and deeply moving, but the book deserves 1 star less because of minor editing problems that result in some redundancy of the narrative. I’d recommend it to anyone who wants to understand the human price of addiction. So, if I had to suggest just one reason to read this book, it’s the hope that comes with the chaos. It’s in Kevin’s final chapters that he hints at redemption, that readers don’t have to be dead before the addiction ends. This is a much-needed glimpse into the world of someone who has loved someone battling addiction.
******
Pills and Me
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon
-
- Book of the Month Participant
- Posts: 375
- Joined: 04 Dec 2024, 14:14
- Currently Reading:
- Bookshelf Size: 27
- Reviewer Page: onlinebookclub.org/reviews/by-joe-alex-2.html
- Latest Review: The Invisible Industry by Bob McGlincy and Larry Kulchawik