Review of Conditional Love

Post by **Julie Marie Basil** » 23 Mar 2025, 08:52

[Following is an official OnlineBookClub.org review of "Conditional Love" by Stacey Berger.]

4 out of 5 stars

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Do you struggle with your relationships with immediate and extended family members? Have you experienced the tension of wanting to support and be present to family while maintaining your sanity? Have you ever gone with the status quo to keep the peace rather than speaking up for yourself? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you should read the memoir Conditional Love by Stacey Berger. This book chronicles Stacey’s life growing up in an enmeshed family and the ways that her family life changed after the passing of her aunt and uncle in a deadly plane crash.

Stacey grew up in what she considered to be a “perfect” family. She is the oldest of 3 girls in a Jewish family, and growing up, she never wanted for anything. Her father owned his own landscaping business and had a larger-than-life personality that left an impression on everyone he encountered. Stacey’s mother helped run the family business, and it was very successful. She has many happy memories of going out to eat at fancy restaurants, going on big family vacations, and attending professional sports games as her dad held season tickets for the Philadelphia Eagles football team and the Philadelphia Flyers hockey team. In high school Stacey began to realize that her family was somewhat different than others, as her family did everything together and her parents were quite strict about family time not being interrupted for any reason. As she grew up, Stacey also experienced her father’s temper on occasion, but she did not fully recognize how controlling her parents were.

Stacey began to question her image of her “perfect” family after her aunt and uncle tragically passed away in a plane crash when Stacey was in her early 20s. Her parents took in her 3 orphaned cousins, and tensions rose between her parents and her cousins, aunt and uncle, and grandparents. Pick up a copy of this memoir if you’re interested in learning more about Stacey’s life and how her perceptions changed as she grew up.

Overall, I enjoyed this memoir and found it to be a very engaging story. My heart went out to Stacey and her cousins for all that they experienced. The biggest complaint that I have about this book is that there were a number of typos and grammar errors that detracted from the reading experience. Due to the typos, I give this book a rating of 4 out of 5 stars. Another round of editing could really improve this story. This story also contained some profanity, but it was not excessive and did not disrupt the reading experience.

******
Conditional Love
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon

Mark Lazarus · Post by **Mark Lazarus** » 25 Mar 2025, 04:09

I really connected with the raw exploration of family dynamics and the shift in perceptions after loss, even though the editing issues were a bit distracting.

Post by **Priya Murugesan** » 25 Mar 2025, 23:16

As I am interested in reading memoirs, this book interests me a lot. The opening questions hooked me and I will surely pick this book if I get a chance. Thanks for your review!

Amy Luman · Post by **Amy Luman** » 26 Mar 2025, 12:33

I can’t say that I have a problem with prioritizing family time. There must be something about it that I am missing. I am curious about Stacey’s life so I may have to give this a try even though I usually do not enjoy memoirs. Thanks!

26 Mar 2025, 14:51

I only answered "yes" to the first question. I am curious about what the book is about and how the author dealt with the family dinamic, but I also found the questions confusing... as if they do not capture the book's essence.

Post by **Julie Marie Basil** » 27 Mar 2025, 12:23

Amy Luman wrote: ↑26 Mar 2025, 12:33 I can’t say that I have a problem with prioritizing family time. There must be something about it that I am missing. I am curious about Stacey’s life so I may have to give this a try even though I usually do not enjoy memoirs. Thanks!

I agree that prioritizing family time is important. In the case of Stacey's family there was frequently no choice to spend time with peers because family time was seen as more important. For example, Stacey was never allowed to watch Eagle's football games with her friends growing up because her dad required her to watch every game with him, no exceptions.

Chi Chiu Michael Mak · Post by **Chi Chiu Michael Mak** » 29 Mar 2025, 00:32

Julie Basil wrote: ↑23 Mar 2025, 08:52 [Following is an official OnlineBookClub.org review of "Conditional Love" by Stacey Berger.]

4 out of 5 stars
Share This Review

Do you struggle with your relationships with immediate and extended family members? Have you experienced the tension of wanting to support and be present to family while maintaining your sanity? Have you ever gone with the status quo to keep the peace rather than speaking up for yourself? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you should read the memoir Conditional Love by Stacey Berger. This book chronicles Stacey’s life growing up in an enmeshed family and the ways that her family life changed after the passing of her aunt and uncle in a deadly plane crash.

Stacey grew up in what she considered to be a “perfect” family. She is the oldest of 3 girls in a Jewish family, and growing up, she never wanted for anything. Her father owned his own landscaping business and had a larger-than-life personality that left an impression on everyone he encountered. Stacey’s mother helped run the family business, and it was very successful. She has many happy memories of going out to eat at fancy restaurants, going on big family vacations, and attending professional sports games as her dad held season tickets for the Philadelphia Eagles football team and the Philadelphia Flyers hockey team. In high school Stacey began to realize that her family was somewhat different than others, as her family did everything together and her parents were quite strict about family time not being interrupted for any reason. As she grew up, Stacey also experienced her father’s temper on occasion, but she did not fully recognize how controlling her parents were.

Stacey began to question her image of her “perfect” family after her aunt and uncle tragically passed away in a plane crash when Stacey was in her early 20s. Her parents took in her 3 orphaned cousins, and tensions rose between her parents and her cousins, aunt and uncle, and grandparents. Pick up a copy of this memoir if you’re interested in learning more about Stacey’s life and how her perceptions changed as she grew up.

Overall, I enjoyed this memoir and found it to be a very engaging story. My heart went out to Stacey and her cousins for all that they experienced. The biggest complaint that I have about this book is that there were a number of typos and grammar errors that detracted from the reading experience. Due to the typos, I give this book a rating of 4 out of 5 stars. Another round of editing could really improve this story. This story also contained some profanity, but it was not excessive and did not disrupt the reading experience.

******
Conditional Love
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon

This book seems like a good way for readers to learn to deal with family members that drain your energy and take without giving back. I feel that the plot would resonate with many people out there, especially people who like watching family dramas and soap operas!

Gerry Steen · Post by **Gerry Steen** » 29 Mar 2025, 13:44

No one has a perfect family, but they do have good families. However, in families of multiple children, each child adopts a role in the family, whether they like it or not. These roles get them through the early stages in their lives but can wear them down as time goes on. The role can become stale, all-encompassing, and tiring. I suspect that this is discussed in the memoir. I hope that it inspires others and that they don't feel alone. I hope the author corrects the grammar errors.

Post by **Anu Anand** » 31 Mar 2025, 00:49

This book sounds like a deep and emotional read. I’m really curious about how Stacey’s view of her family changed over time. It’s always interesting to see how people handle family tensions. The typos are a bit disappointing, though. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

Post by **Jeff Kanda** » 01 Apr 2025, 07:36

There is definitely no "perfect" family. Even with my family members, in as much as we are family, I believe in individual relationships. This seems to be a book that I will enjoy. Thanks for the review!

RJ Reviews · Post by **RJ Reviews** » 06 Apr 2025, 04:43

Lack of good editing can ruin a good book! This memoir sounds intriguing though I usually find them very generic. Stacey's family surely isn't tge perfect one. The, nothing is perfect. After reading your eloquent review, I may read this book. Thank you.