Sexual Abstinence Before Marriage?

Post by **Julie Gebrosky** » 14 Jan 2023, 22:21

Patty Allread wrote: ↑05 Jan 2023, 11:53 Sexual abstinence before marriage is considered "old fashioned" today, but I think it is more prevalent than many people realize. Entertainment, news, and social media would have us believe that abstinence is no longer necessary or valid. When I look at our current society, I see a tremendous effort to bring sexual relations down to only a physical sensation that doesn't matter as long as it pleases. We have so much pressure today to discount the spiritual aspect of such an intimate relationship. We also see considerations promoted that don't take the future of the people involved into account. No matter what someone decides in terms of their sexual activity and choices, there is tremendous value in looking at the bigger picture and considering the future.

I think this is very well said!

This is a complicated issue, and it’s not a one-size-fits-all type of answer. It appears that abstinence is becoming very rare, but it could be our culture changing or simply our perception.

Post by **Akshi Porwal** » 15 Jan 2023, 04:27

Sexual abstinence before marriage should not be the norm, neither should be having sex. Everyone adult should be given the choice and the consent.

Post by **Donna Walker** » 15 Jan 2023, 22:03

I completely disagree! I am 39 years old and have never been married. I have had two wonderful long-term relationships that naturally ran their course. I've also had plenty of fun in between! I really do not think that we should be putting sex on some weird kind of moral pedestal. Sex is a natural experience, and no piece of paper, such as a marriage certificate, qualifies you to enjoy it! Yes, it is okay for women to enjoy sex too! We are not just baby-making machines. I find this kind of "no sex before marriage" thinking to be an extremely mentally unhealthy way of looking at such a natural act!

Vidhi Adhikari · Post by **Vidhi Adhikari** » 17 Jan 2023, 00:26

Monale Bariyima Ueh wrote: ↑04 Jan 2023, 02:12 I agree with sexual abstinence before marriage. I believe marriage is a sacred union. Although it can and has been abused and trivialized more recently, that doesn't take away from the institution of marriage. Also I believe that sex should not be trivialized. It should be given the honour of occuring only within a matrimony.

I feel that sexual abstinence affects people according to their nature. If they attach emotional connection with sex, they might want to share their bodies with select individuals. For those who do not consider sex as a big deal might not benefit from this practice.

Annas Felix · Post by **Annas Felix** » 17 Jan 2023, 04:12

I do not have any problems with sexual abstinence before marriage. However, the author talks about it from a Christian perspective. It makes me wonder what non-Christians stands to benefit from it reading this book.

Jack Winnick · Post by **Alex Reeves** » 18 Jan 2023, 15:27

Surely, most religions advise their members to abstain from premarital sex. Looking at it from another perspective, premarital sex can cause several problems, including unwanted pregnancy and others. However, with adequate safety and consent from both parties, I believe it is no wrong to have sex with a willing partner before you tie the knot. It can boost trust between the two partners, and I must clearly tell you that there are several other benefits from this than you may expect.

Post by **Donna Walker** » 20 Jan 2023, 15:00

Hellen Muriithi wrote: ↑04 Jan 2023, 22:59
jeminah28 wrote: ↑03 Jan 2023, 02:37 Sexual abstinence before marriage?

I agree with this explanation from the author. It helps avoid negative thoughts from a conflict, especially insecurities. From my own experience, it's a way of consoling myself against any doubts. Sexual abstinence also helps me in counseling, particularly with the young ladies. Usually, women are the most affected by their own wrong choices about premarital sex.
I beg to differ. We are putting sex on a pedestal, completely forgetting the factors at play that influence those who have sec before marriage (voluntary). The fact that we live in a liberal world full of information that is accessible even to minors makes it quite insensitive to judge those who have sex before marriage. Ours is a society where parents release the holds on their children when they get to campus, in the pretext of adulthood.

I agree with you here. We should not be putting sex on a pedestal. Being a virgin does not make you morally superior. Books like this can do more harm than good, especially in the society in which we now live. The whole idea is insanely outdated and terribly judgemental!

Post by **Crs webco** » 22 Jan 2023, 17:27

Alex Reeves wrote: ↑04 Jan 2023, 02:00 Some people, particularly young adults like myself, will not stay put with a woman without sex. I know this may sound extreme to older individuals, however, this is the norm today in many societies. I believe one should be aware of the sexual situation with a partner before jumping right into marriage.

I think that it is a shame that some people miss out on the "oh, so, special" feelings that accompany the "one and only" type of relationship between men and women. Perhaps what you see as the extreme thinking of your elders is instead, a huge regret for those that play fast and loose, and then wonder why they are not as contented with their lives as they would like to be, or as the elders are.

Of course, as our ancestors often did, some experienced males will still look for a virgin to marry when they decide that the time is right! This leads to the woman feeling the "one and only" feelings while her new husband sees her as "one of the girls" and this contradiction of feelings has led to more than one broken home.

I believe sex is one of the most powerful, splendid, and beautiful parts of being human, but only if it is not treated as an ugly, dirty little secret or spread around like the newest food or drink at a party. It is special only when both adults involved treat it as special.

marta baglioni · Post by **marta baglioni** » 23 Jan 2023, 06:50

I think sex is a very important part of a relationship, so I really could not fathom tying the knot without having tested it. What I believe is harmful is not sex itself, but misinformation about it. Sexual education is of primary importance, and most of the danger of sex comes from not having one.
That said, being sexually active or not should be only determined by the person involved, and applying peer pressure in one direction or the other is wrong in my opinion.

marta baglioni · Post by **marta baglioni** » 23 Jan 2023, 06:53

Donna Walker 1 wrote: ↑15 Jan 2023, 22:03 I completely disagree! I am 39 years old and have never been married. I have had two wonderful long-term relationships that naturally ran their course. I've also had plenty of fun in between! I really do not think that we should be putting sex on some weird kind of moral pedestal. Sex is a natural experience, and no piece of paper, such as a marriage certificate, qualifies you to enjoy it! Yes, it is okay for women to enjoy sex too! We are not just baby-making machines. I find this kind of "no sex before marriage" thinking to be an extremely mentally unhealthy way of looking at such a natural act!

Could not have explained it better. Thank you!

Chimdik Chimezi · Post by **Chimdik Chimezi** » 23 Jan 2023, 22:51

Sexual abstinence before marriage will save you the trouble of getting infection and spending money on treatment. I support purity till marriage.

Sarah McAnally · Post by **Sarah McAnally** » 24 Jan 2023, 11:23

Newsflash. Not everyone's goal in life is to be married. Not all women base their value as a person on who they have sex with or when. Perhaps instead of stereotyping and judging others or comparing the olden times with today - we could trust people - especially women to make informed decisions that are right for them. Sex is a part of the human experience and nothing good comes from condemning those who experience it differently than you choose to. Live and let live. Love and let love.

Sarah McAnally · Post by **Sarah McAnally** » 24 Jan 2023, 11:24

Kenneth Onyenwe wrote: ↑23 Jan 2023, 22:51 Sexual abstinence before marriage will save you the trouble of getting infection and spending money on treatment. I support purity till marriage.

Marriage does not prevent STIs!

Sarah McAnally · Post by **Sarah McAnally** » 24 Jan 2023, 11:24

marta baglioni wrote: ↑23 Jan 2023, 06:53
Donna Walker 1 wrote: ↑15 Jan 2023, 22:03 I completely disagree! I am 39 years old and have never been married. I have had two wonderful long-term relationships that naturally ran their course. I've also had plenty of fun in between! I really do not think that we should be putting sex on some weird kind of moral pedestal. Sex is a natural experience, and no piece of paper, such as a marriage certificate, qualifies you to enjoy it! Yes, it is okay for women to enjoy sex too! We are not just baby-making machines. I find this kind of "no sex before marriage" thinking to be an extremely mentally unhealthy way of looking at such a natural act!
Could not have explained it better. Thank you!

Amen!

Post by **Nganyi Humphrey** » 25 Jan 2023, 07:58

Sexual abstinence before marriage is difficult as can be seen in the current society. Young adults get into relationships at a young age and would like to explore what sex is all about. Some individuals don't look to getting married, therefore such a topic makes no sense to them.