Is disciplining children for mischievous antics good for their future?

Use this forum to discuss the February 2023 Book of the Month, "Mark Victor Hansen, Relentless: Wisdom Behind the Incomparable Chicken Soup for the Soul" by Mitzi Perdue.
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Is disciplining children for mischievous antics good for their future?

Post by Olga Markova »

The early chapters of Relentless describe Mark's childhood and many mischievous antics that got him and his brothers to be disciplined by his mother gently by cornering or spanking with a home slipper at the extreme. Even cornered, the boys theatrically wailed but once their mum was out of sight they were laughing. I personally think that Mark's parents were amazingly wise in the degree of sanction for the boys' mischiefs - showing them boundaries of safe play yet not "caging" their minds, and this gentle treatment contributed to Mark's success in his future life. What do you think?
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Post by Phoebe Felix »

I had mixed feelings reading how Mark's parents disciplined, considering the children's reaction afterward. For me, I believe it was a game of chance and could have make Mark and his siblings turn out either way. Thank goodness Mark turned out right, and we can enjoy this book as a result.
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Post by Hannah Hampton »

I think it's important for parents to make sure their kids know how to live in a safe and respectful way, and therefore discipline is necessary. I personally disagree with some of the ways that Mark and his brothers were punished, but I think his parents approached their antics with the success and adjustment of their kids in mind.
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Post by Jack King »

As a whole I’m against physical punishment for children. In terms of other punishment I think it’s fine as long as it’s in proportion.
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Find me on my knees with my soul laid bare
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Post by Alice Fu »

I think the idea of discipline is heavily controversial. While it is important for kids to understand that their behavior has consequences, there are many forms of punishments that do nothing but create a tense relationship between the children and parents. All I can say is that I'm glad Mark's childhood resulted in him being the great success he is today.
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Post by Naghma Qureshi »

With evolving generations, not only have parenting styles changed but also the impact of any parenting or disciplining tactics on children has changed drastically. The younger generation today is so much different, curious, forward-thinking, and quicker than people my age were when I was a child. I cannot be sure how much Mark's parents disciplining techniques contributed to his success. But for any child, if they feel secure in being loved by their parents, trusted, and respected, then occasionally moderate disciplining tactics won't do harm. Everything we do or say as a parent is directly connected to a child's self-esteem and self-worth.
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Post by ThankGod Onyishi »

While I may not agree with the method of disciplining children, I believe discipline is essential to ensure that a child learns to differentiate good from bad. Here in Nigeria though, children are spanked or shouted at and I am glad that I was raised that way (although not too extreme).
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Post by José Cortez »

Discipline helps children to differentiate good from bad, and several forms of discipline can be applied, while those that are too extreme should be avoided. I believe that disciplining children helps them to learn that their behaviours are not appreciated.
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Post by Meghan Sica »

I believe discipline is important. Children need to know that there are consequences for their actions. Discipline should be brought about in such a way that children learn from their mistakes, not in a way that makes them fearful of making mistakes. Without discipline children will grow up being entitled and have no conscience, they'll believe they can get away with anything because they always have.
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Post by Stephanie Elizabeth »

I believe it all comes down to setting boundaries and kids being well aware of what s acceptable behavior is and what is not. That being said, kids are always going to test parents to see how much they can get away with. How parents react is important. I do not believe in physical discipline, and lessons can be learned through taking away privileges temporarily.
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Post by Itz Savaga »

I think the world will be filled with a lot vices if children aren't disciplined properly at home. Mark's mother is a great mother. She understood the place of discipline in parenting and perfectly utilised it to mould her children into good members of society. I don't think her treatment towards them was gross in any way.
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Post by Timothy Rucinski »

I'm probably older than most people commenting on this topic, but as someone far from being a spring chicken, I wholeheartedly agree that children need to be disciplined. Anarchy under the age of sixteen is unacceptable, and without proper parental guidance, that is unacceptable to society. There is nothing wrong with holding a child responsible for his or her actions. My own mother was good with time-outs and the occasional slap on the tush. Her mantra was that slapping one of her children was appropriate, but only when done with the palm of the hand. I respected that then, and I respect that now. That's how I raised my children. They turned out to be exceptional. I agree with how the Hansens handled their ornery youngsters, and I think that momentary acts of parental discipline give the offender time to think not only about what he or she did but how he or she will act in the future.
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Post by Stephanie Runyon »

I think that discipline is something that should be tailored individually to each child. I am not an advocate of beating a child to tears; however, holding them accountable for their actions is something that few parents do. For instance, a sibling of mine stole from a store. Rather than spank her, my mother had her take the item she took and walked her back to the store. She then had my sister apologize, return the items, and she had to volunteer to clean the storefront windows every day for a week. I knew that my behavior in school would result in punishment at home. There was always a talk that went with our punishments as children. As adults, my sister and I have never been in any type of trouble and we accept responsibility for our actions. We also understand that our actions can affect other people and take that into consideration before we make decisions.
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Post by Shillah Andeso »

I think Mark's parents disciplined their children in the best way they knew how. When parents discipline their children, they are not sure how this will end up, they just hope for the best. Sometimes I think how the kids end up solely depends on what they choose to learn.
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Post by Bef Ozo »

Doscillating children is best for their future because they can learn better and faster at a younger age. So, anything they learn at a younger age tends to stick faster to them for life. It is sad to see how most parents shy away from discipline but it's importance has never been overemphasised.
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