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By the time a child has reached the age of two years, the Psychologist says that he is ‘self conscious ’. This is not the same as they lat use of the term, although there is a connection. The Psychologist means that the child is aware that he is a self and not an extension of his mother.

This awareness is shown in such behavioral acts as disobedience and the use of the word 'no' with empaasis, because the child is aware that he does not have to obey parental commands. Parent commands (moral imperative) are given through out these two years first for the child's own safety, for instance, don't touch the fire and secondly, so that he begin to develop some sense of right and wrong!

An adult is able to weigh the consequences of his actions, partly because he has developed a concept of idea of time. The young child lack this concept and his governed by his immediate desires which must be fulfilled. Thus, in some situations, he can excuse from not behaving morally I.e, making the choice which is 'good' for himself and others. In another word or situation, he knows what is right and choose not to do it. Through immature, adult can also behave in this self-centered way.

Yes, what you described about is like the second stage of human development according to Freud's Psychosexual Stages of development. The second stage is called Anal stage, and the child begins to use the word, 'no,' it begins to take control of life. And that is why those who have control issues are called anal.

Yes this is a good summary of stages of human development. When you create characters in a story, it is important that they act in a way that is commensurate with their developmental stage and age.