Official Review: Envenom by Jay Chris
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krood10
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Official Review: Envenom by Jay Chris
[Following is the official OnlineBookClub.org review of "Envenom" by Jay Chris.]
1 out of 4 stars
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In his debut novel Envenom, Jay Chris introduces us to the United States after a deadly virus nearly decimates the human race. What population remains is under the control of a dictator known as the Crusader. Kelvin Klayton is the hero of this young adult fantasy novel. Kelvin lives in Liberty Republic, an outlying city that is able to maintain some autonomy. After single-handedly defeating a gang of thieves, Kelvin is commissioned by the General for a dangerous mission. He and a group of other skilled fighters must sneak into Sentinel City and steal the antidote for the deadly virus. This book alternates between the perspectives of Kelvin and his co-leader, Cora, as they embark on their quest. The journey through the wilderness dividing the two cities is dangerous and fraught with deadly creatures. Kelvin and Cora have to work to keep everyone alive and ensure the mission is a success.
I cannot stress how much I wanted to like this book. After reading the description, I couldn’t wait to start reading. I really wanted this book to be great. Even when the prologue did not come close to meeting those expectations, I still stuck with it. I was waiting for it to reach the potential I thought it could achieve. It never got there. While this book had some elements that were great, but it had too many aspects that were not.
This plot is exciting! I was rarely wanting for adventure and thrill. There were new twists and dangers along the way. The creatures in this book were really cool. The world the author created was diverse and interesting. The action portions of the story were the best-written parts. The excitement is what kept me from giving up on this book completely.
Unfortunately, the action was the only thing this book had going for it. The rest of the book was rough reading. The dialogue is my first major complaint. There would be a whole page of conversation with no indication as to who was speaking. It was very hard to follow. There were few breaks in the conversations for character thoughts and reactions. I had no idea what the narrator was thinking about what was said. This was a huge missing element to the story.
Another huge turn-off was the interactions between the characters. I didn’t understand many of the things the characters would do or say to each other. It did not feel like real people interacting in real life. Characters would form unbreakable emotional bonds the same day they met for no apparent reason. The main character expresses his undying love to a girl he met two days ago. This declaration came during their first serious conversation. Two strong and independent warrior women get into a petty fight over a guy they both just met. This did not seem consistent with their characters or realistic for most females. Throughout the book, I saw no evidence for the trust that was given. All of the relationships went from complete and total strangers to best friends or lovers within a day or two. There needs to be more time and effort put into building the relationships for it to feel real.
Finally, this book did not let me discover anything. There was way too much telling, and not nearly enough showing. The entire prologue is dedicated to world building and back-story. The first few pages laid everything out in the open. There was no mystery and no gaps that needed to be filled. I was often told exactly what the supporting characters were thinking, even though it was written in first person. I want infer what the characters feel based on actions, reactions, and body language. I missed the excitement of discovery.
With all these factors in mind, I give Envenom 1 out of 4 stars. Yes, it was an exciting story, but I cannot recommend it. This book was riddled with major grammatical errors, misused words, and wrong punctuation. The dialogue was cheesy and unbelievable. The relationships were forced and rushed. I needed more than just mediocre action scenes to keep me interested. With that said, this book has so much potential. I am certain that if the author makes some major adjustments and rewrites, this book could be a huge hit. To me, this felt like a decent first draft. With some reworking, editing, and perhaps some input from a writing group, Envenom could become a phenomenal read.
******
Envenom
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon
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1 out of 4 stars
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In his debut novel Envenom, Jay Chris introduces us to the United States after a deadly virus nearly decimates the human race. What population remains is under the control of a dictator known as the Crusader. Kelvin Klayton is the hero of this young adult fantasy novel. Kelvin lives in Liberty Republic, an outlying city that is able to maintain some autonomy. After single-handedly defeating a gang of thieves, Kelvin is commissioned by the General for a dangerous mission. He and a group of other skilled fighters must sneak into Sentinel City and steal the antidote for the deadly virus. This book alternates between the perspectives of Kelvin and his co-leader, Cora, as they embark on their quest. The journey through the wilderness dividing the two cities is dangerous and fraught with deadly creatures. Kelvin and Cora have to work to keep everyone alive and ensure the mission is a success.
I cannot stress how much I wanted to like this book. After reading the description, I couldn’t wait to start reading. I really wanted this book to be great. Even when the prologue did not come close to meeting those expectations, I still stuck with it. I was waiting for it to reach the potential I thought it could achieve. It never got there. While this book had some elements that were great, but it had too many aspects that were not.
This plot is exciting! I was rarely wanting for adventure and thrill. There were new twists and dangers along the way. The creatures in this book were really cool. The world the author created was diverse and interesting. The action portions of the story were the best-written parts. The excitement is what kept me from giving up on this book completely.
Unfortunately, the action was the only thing this book had going for it. The rest of the book was rough reading. The dialogue is my first major complaint. There would be a whole page of conversation with no indication as to who was speaking. It was very hard to follow. There were few breaks in the conversations for character thoughts and reactions. I had no idea what the narrator was thinking about what was said. This was a huge missing element to the story.
Another huge turn-off was the interactions between the characters. I didn’t understand many of the things the characters would do or say to each other. It did not feel like real people interacting in real life. Characters would form unbreakable emotional bonds the same day they met for no apparent reason. The main character expresses his undying love to a girl he met two days ago. This declaration came during their first serious conversation. Two strong and independent warrior women get into a petty fight over a guy they both just met. This did not seem consistent with their characters or realistic for most females. Throughout the book, I saw no evidence for the trust that was given. All of the relationships went from complete and total strangers to best friends or lovers within a day or two. There needs to be more time and effort put into building the relationships for it to feel real.
Finally, this book did not let me discover anything. There was way too much telling, and not nearly enough showing. The entire prologue is dedicated to world building and back-story. The first few pages laid everything out in the open. There was no mystery and no gaps that needed to be filled. I was often told exactly what the supporting characters were thinking, even though it was written in first person. I want infer what the characters feel based on actions, reactions, and body language. I missed the excitement of discovery.
With all these factors in mind, I give Envenom 1 out of 4 stars. Yes, it was an exciting story, but I cannot recommend it. This book was riddled with major grammatical errors, misused words, and wrong punctuation. The dialogue was cheesy and unbelievable. The relationships were forced and rushed. I needed more than just mediocre action scenes to keep me interested. With that said, this book has so much potential. I am certain that if the author makes some major adjustments and rewrites, this book could be a huge hit. To me, this felt like a decent first draft. With some reworking, editing, and perhaps some input from a writing group, Envenom could become a phenomenal read.
******
Envenom
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon
Like krood10's review? Post a comment saying so!
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