Sample of something I am currently working on

Use this forum to post short stories that you have written. This is for getting comments and constructive feedback. This is for original, creative works. You must post the actual text, no links.
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Fifi_eve12
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Sample of something I am currently working on

Post by Fifi_eve12 »

I am an amateur writer, so I would be grateful for any advice and feedback on my work- here is a short sample!

***
"Listen to me!" She hisses, her persistent tone stained with agitation.
I know I should, but listening to her will only flood me with grief and anger.
"You can't protect them forever. You can't shield them or yourself from reality. They must fend for themselves."
My tail begins to jitter and I avoid her gaze. "Why must it be like that?"I murmur, my voice so quiet that I can barely hear it myself. All I want is for my cubs to be safe. To survive.
"I'm sorry," she replies, suddenly more sympathy in her voice. "But that's just the way it is for all of us. Sometimes the hunter is the hunted."
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boardj
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Post by boardj »

I really like the way you describe how the character reacts!
Latest Review: The Sparrow by Denna M. Davis
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Fifi_eve12
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Currently Reading: The Seven Deaths Of Evelyn Hardcastle
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Post by Fifi_eve12 »

boardj wrote: ↑24 Mar 2019, 13:56 I really like the way you describe how the character reacts!
Thank you! :tiphat:
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