Untitled by Vanessa Linders
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Untitled by Vanessa Linders
The following story has been selected as a featured runner-up in our 2015 short story contest (Contest Theme - "The Self-Destructiveness of Vengeance and Hate")
Untitled by Vanessa Linders
I was untouchable, I was just too unappealing, I was just not as desirable as the other girls. And it drives me insane; these three things that all of my crushes have said to me at one point or another going around and around in my head every night making want to scream, making e want to pull out my hair, making me want to rip off my face; these three things that keep me awake at night, slowly destroying me from the inside out and tearing me apart. untouchable. unappealing. undesirable. untouchable. unappealing. undesirable. UNTOUCHABLE! UNAPPEALING! UNDESIRABLE! I pulled the covers over my head and smothered my face with my pillow while my head silently imploded. With my head full of static and my eyes in a haze I got out of bed and uneasily walked to the bathroom, my stomach tied in knots the entire time. Completely unaware of what I was doing I got the tweezers and the razor and pulled out the small blades; pulled down my pants and dragged them across my hip, once, twice, I lost count after a while and passed out. I woke up at 6:15 the next morning to the sound of the anguished screams of my parents and the pummelling of their fists on the locked door, slowly I raised my head not wanting to pass back into oblivion and looked at the door. with one more ear-piercing shriek from my mother and the sound of splintering wood and a heavy thump, the door was in two and I was forced into looking upon the tortured faces of my distraught parents and the shame I could never shake. with tears gushing down three faces in a room soaked in blood my mother wrapped me in a towel and helped me to the car before driving me to the hospital.
In less than three hours I had been diagnosed with depression and insomnia.
As we left the E.R I swore to myself that I would never see that look on my parents faces again, I convinced myself that it was not my fault but theirs, the fault lay with those boys and I convinced myself that no matter how unreasonable it was to place the blame in the hands of a few teenage boys that my logic was sound and flawless and I swore to myself that no matter how long it took I would get my revenge.
I was back at school within the week and had avoided all questions and started working my way back in with the boys. Earning their trust I dug my claws in deeper and deeper all the while pretending to take my medication, spiralling unknowingly into deep seeded insanity and planning out my revenge.
in less than three months I had gotten my hands on cyanide and day after day I put a small amount in each of there food, not enough to kill them but enough to make sure they got sick enough to be hospitalised within the month but I was getting sloppy with my work, one of them found my plans and I had to neutralise the threat.
The body was found a year later, the same week that the other 5 died of poisoning. and I was taken in for questioning but I'm smooth enough for them not to suspect me although in the end, we all get caught; my court date came and went and I was convicted of first degree murder on six counts and wound up with life in prison and yet another diagnoses but this time it came with a reputation, and that is the reputation of a sociopath but oh what a shame, what a shame I wasn't sly enough to get away with murder, but either way, in my mind it was worth it.
Untitled by Vanessa Linders
I was untouchable, I was just too unappealing, I was just not as desirable as the other girls. And it drives me insane; these three things that all of my crushes have said to me at one point or another going around and around in my head every night making want to scream, making e want to pull out my hair, making me want to rip off my face; these three things that keep me awake at night, slowly destroying me from the inside out and tearing me apart. untouchable. unappealing. undesirable. untouchable. unappealing. undesirable. UNTOUCHABLE! UNAPPEALING! UNDESIRABLE! I pulled the covers over my head and smothered my face with my pillow while my head silently imploded. With my head full of static and my eyes in a haze I got out of bed and uneasily walked to the bathroom, my stomach tied in knots the entire time. Completely unaware of what I was doing I got the tweezers and the razor and pulled out the small blades; pulled down my pants and dragged them across my hip, once, twice, I lost count after a while and passed out. I woke up at 6:15 the next morning to the sound of the anguished screams of my parents and the pummelling of their fists on the locked door, slowly I raised my head not wanting to pass back into oblivion and looked at the door. with one more ear-piercing shriek from my mother and the sound of splintering wood and a heavy thump, the door was in two and I was forced into looking upon the tortured faces of my distraught parents and the shame I could never shake. with tears gushing down three faces in a room soaked in blood my mother wrapped me in a towel and helped me to the car before driving me to the hospital.
In less than three hours I had been diagnosed with depression and insomnia.
As we left the E.R I swore to myself that I would never see that look on my parents faces again, I convinced myself that it was not my fault but theirs, the fault lay with those boys and I convinced myself that no matter how unreasonable it was to place the blame in the hands of a few teenage boys that my logic was sound and flawless and I swore to myself that no matter how long it took I would get my revenge.
I was back at school within the week and had avoided all questions and started working my way back in with the boys. Earning their trust I dug my claws in deeper and deeper all the while pretending to take my medication, spiralling unknowingly into deep seeded insanity and planning out my revenge.
in less than three months I had gotten my hands on cyanide and day after day I put a small amount in each of there food, not enough to kill them but enough to make sure they got sick enough to be hospitalised within the month but I was getting sloppy with my work, one of them found my plans and I had to neutralise the threat.
The body was found a year later, the same week that the other 5 died of poisoning. and I was taken in for questioning but I'm smooth enough for them not to suspect me although in the end, we all get caught; my court date came and went and I was convicted of first degree murder on six counts and wound up with life in prison and yet another diagnoses but this time it came with a reputation, and that is the reputation of a sociopath but oh what a shame, what a shame I wasn't sly enough to get away with murder, but either way, in my mind it was worth it.
