Life of a poor-regrets and what ifs
Posted: 02 Feb 2018, 19:44
I don't know if its appropriate to call my myself poor for having a little salary to be budgeted, no parents on our side, renting a room to live,and no place to call home. My parents separated at the age of 5, I guess, and our mom needs to go abroad to support us and we were left on our aunt's house. This time I fell that we are like dogs, being left behind by their parents to be taken care of by other people. I grew up in a urban area and this is where I study from elementary to secondary where I gain friends but never a bestfriend because may I have trusts issues. And this is my first regret, "(1)NOT HAVING A BESTFRIEND", I know I am a jolly person, people look up to me as if i don't have problems because I always hold it in me on my own to think and solve. Even my relatives nor my mom knows i have a problem and continue to smile in front of them. In my head, if I have a bestfriend what would be the difference, having person to talk to, a shoulder to cry on , a helping hand in solving such problems. But i never had that, I always fell something clogging in my throat every time i hold what i need to say and end up taking a deep breath and hiding it.
And after graduating in secondary, I again lived in my relatives in a rural area for college. And this is where my second regret happened, (2)I DID NOT STUDIED WELL. I enrolled in a public college two rides from where I live, took up a finance course but never excelled but continued anyway thinking I can manage this . I graduated in eventually but not with flying colors maybe because I don't have a will in doing it. I go to school, sit, listen, study a little and go home, I think I am a very lazy kid. What if it is opposite, I took up Accountancy and studied well, maybe I am now an accountant and receives a higher salary and can help my relatives in their financial needs. But I can't coz I end up in a lower rank, receives a little pay and needs to tolerate a hot headed boss. . . .. to be continued.
"Regret of neglected opportunity is the worst hell that a living soul can inhabit."
Rafael Sabatini
And after graduating in secondary, I again lived in my relatives in a rural area for college. And this is where my second regret happened, (2)I DID NOT STUDIED WELL. I enrolled in a public college two rides from where I live, took up a finance course but never excelled but continued anyway thinking I can manage this . I graduated in eventually but not with flying colors maybe because I don't have a will in doing it. I go to school, sit, listen, study a little and go home, I think I am a very lazy kid. What if it is opposite, I took up Accountancy and studied well, maybe I am now an accountant and receives a higher salary and can help my relatives in their financial needs. But I can't coz I end up in a lower rank, receives a little pay and needs to tolerate a hot headed boss. . . .. to be continued.
"Regret of neglected opportunity is the worst hell that a living soul can inhabit."
Rafael Sabatini