Heavy weighs the poets hand.

[ncoard]

My mother tells me she wishes she could write the way I do.

I don’t know how to explain to her that writing poetry never feels so much like creating something
and more like redesigning something already there.
More like solving a puzzle I already had the pieces for despite losing the box.

I want to tell her that —
There’s so much I need to say and so little time to say it.
So a lot of the time I don’t.
I wonder if she’d believe that. If she’d believe that despite the constant stream of words, there’s still so much left behind,
left tangled and lost within my skull until I will it into something new,
something digestible that won’t keep me up at night,
Something that won’t weight so heavy in my gut.

My mother has always told me I hold onto things too much.
Onto little moments, old memories and people that won’t ever come back.
I tell her that my back hurts because I carry so much,
And I don’t know where I can put any of this down
without it feeling like a gutting,
without it feeling like I’m slicing myself open
and bleeding all of the things that I carry with me onto the pavement.

And I’m tired of feeling like all I do is make a mess.

So instead, I slice open my pointer finger and paint with the blood that pours out.
Little by little I empty myself onto canvas and it feels less like a mess and
More like my body is finally becoming art enough to make up for all of that sadness.

My mother tells me she wishes she could write the way I do
And I want to tell her that I wish I didn’t need to.

[BrittaniDJ]

Stunning. I empathize with this so well and I think poetry is supposed to do that; go into the world, make a connection to someone or something based on mutual understanding.
I don't know if I have anything to say for constructive criticism. One line I was wondering if it should have been split. That's the only thing. Just for the flow and feel of a poem. "I wonder if she'd believe. If she'd believe.."
Maybe split after the first sentence there?

[ErikaP13]

So good. Wow, reading this was incredible. You truly did paint a picture, even if it wasn't with blood on a canvas. Brilliantly written, well done.

[Billy Bookmark]

Some very touching creative works come from a writers sorrow. After all poetry is an expression of emotion but writing also can come from joy. I related to this poem on certain levels.This poem is a reminder that writing is great therapy