Fire to me

Use this forum to post poetry that you have written. This is for getting comments and constructive feedback. This is for original, creative works. You must post the actual text, no links. Only one poem per topic please.
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Bookwyrm719
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Icon Fire to me

Post by Bookwyrm719 »

Fire fire
All around me
Fire fire
All I can see
Fire fire
Its all in my mind
Fire fire
Wish you would be kind
Fire fire
Your words are to me
Fire fire
Consuming me
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literarycat
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Post by literarycat »

I like it, though I feel like you could probably do more with it. I would almost take out "Its" in the line of Its all in my mind....then you would have the repetition of all along with the repetition of fire fire.
The world breaks everyone, and afterwards, some are strong at the broken points ~ Ernest Hemingway.
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Bookwyrm719
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Post by Bookwyrm719 »

Thank you I am glad for the advice
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