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Heroin
Posted: 09 Sep 2016, 11:42
by ZandraLynn
Day after day and night after night
I can see your struggles
I have watched you fight
Your body is weak
Your mind is poison
The things you speak
The life you've chosen...
So many times you've lost your way
Looking for hope
Learning to pray
The pain in your eyes
The scars on your skin
A part of you dies
The demons' within
Re: Heroin
Posted: 09 Sep 2016, 17:00
by DATo
Raw and powerful! Once again, much like your last short story, you express yourself simply and that very simplicity adds an additional dimension of reality to the poem. Very well written in my opinion.
Re: Heroin
Posted: 09 Sep 2016, 22:16
by ZandraLynn
Thank you, this was inspired by my nest friend whom I lost to the demon.
Re: Heroin
Posted: 10 Sep 2016, 01:43
by Ashley 1820
fantastic job.as Dato said...very well writen.it's simple but powerful enough.keep it up!
Re: Heroin
Posted: 10 Sep 2016, 03:21
by tarafarah7
Sorry about your friend:-( Your last line says it all...I enjoyed reading. Thx!
Re: Heroin
Posted: 10 Sep 2016, 19:37
by feveredpoet
i found it condescending, and angry. but still poetry. i would like to have heard more of your struggle, because no one knows what that person was really going through, and all this does is paints it in a negative and judgmental way, to me. best of luck in your poetry tho.
-- 10 Sep 2016, 19:53 --
forgive me for defending those without a voice <3
Re: Heroin
Posted: 23 Sep 2016, 19:19
by R_Coffey2017
Beautifully written. Most addicts dont realize how their addictions effect those around them.
Re: Heroin
Posted: 24 Sep 2016, 03:41
by zero_macabre
Amazing poem.. I loved it. As mentioned it was so simple, yet to me it brought across such a strong message. Thank you for sharing this poem with us.
Re: Heroin
Posted: 25 Sep 2016, 04:50
by Genaaa
Excellent job, his is extremely well written. Despite being somewhat simple, it conveys an immense amount of emotion through the words you chose.