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Can you make some feedbacks or recommendations? I'm accepting negative feedbacks for my improvement.

LIES

Every guy
Expectation is high
That checks on us like a fire
And talking too much lies.

'I like you', First lie
'Can I court you', Another falsify
Could you guys' be considerate
And don't make us discombobulate?

'Will you be mine', Third lie
And then we buy
And lately we cry
That cause our heart,
Soon to die.

I like this - terse and expressive. It also occurs to me it would work well with a musical track ...