English is tough but can someone help me with what is wrong here

Some grammar rules (and embarrassing mistakes!) transcend the uniqueness of different regions and style guides. This new International Grammar section by OnlineBookClub.org ultimately identifies those rules thus providing a simple, flexible rule-set, respecting the differences between regions and style guides. You can feel free to ask general questions about spelling and grammar. You can also provide example sentences for other members to proofread and inform you of any grammar mistakes.

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Benitasyanora Yanora
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English is tough but can someone help me with what is wrong here

Post by Benitasyanora Yanora »

Good Morning,

As I write these thoughts, what in them would you all consider a better sentence:

As humans, we are fallible creatures and much of it due to the struggles we face and our inability to get out of our own way.
2. first an egg, fragile and breakable; then a caterpillar building to become larva;
3. That goal in reaching our conscious mind to self-realization

Where can I find this International Grammer tool?

Thanks in advance for your thoughts.
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Omneya Shakeep
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Post by Omneya Shakeep »

Scribens and Grammarly are good options, you can try them.
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kipper_
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Post by kipper_ »

If you are wanting suggestions to improve each of these sentences, here's what I would do:

1). "As humans, we are fallible creatures and much of it due to the struggles we face and our inability to get out of our own way"
>> "As humans, we are fallible creatures, and mostly due to the struggles we face and our inability to get out of our own way.

2). "first an egg, fragile and breakable; then a caterpillar building to become larva;"
>> "first an egg—fragile and breakable—then a caterpillar becoming larva."

3). "That goal in reaching our conscious mind to self-realization"
>> "That goal in pushing our conscious mind to self-realization"

I can't offer much more without knowing the context of the sentences. Hopefully this helps!
Andrew Butchers
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Post by Andrew Butchers »

Benitasyanora Yanora wrote: 17 Nov 2022, 09:22 Good Morning,

As I write these thoughts, what in them would you all consider a better sentence:

As humans, we are fallible creatures and much of it due to the struggles we face and our inability to get out of our own way.
2. first an egg, fragile and breakable; then a caterpillar building to become larva;
3. That goal in reaching our conscious mind to self-realization

Where can I find this International Grammer tool?

Thanks in advance for your thoughts.
What do you mean by "our inability to get out of our own way." ?
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