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"Cupid Day" at Thomas Jefferson High School plays a big role in Before I Fall. The whole tradition of Cupid Day seems very odd to me, almost like the school is deliberately allowing the "haves" to lord their status over the "have-nots" and those receiving fewer roses.

While reading the book, I thought that Cupid Day was stupid and no school would actually ever do anything like that. But then I thought back to my own high school days. I graduated in 1997, and while we didn't have a Cupid Day, the school did allow flowers, cards, balloons, etc. to be delivered to the office during class. Two minutes before the class bell rang, the school secretary would announce over the school-wide loudspeaker a list of students who needed to come to the office. It wasn't specifically announced that they had gifts waiting for them, but we all knew they did. I remember waiting in a full class, all the girls listening intently to the loud speaker, silently willing their names to be called, and the joy and disappointment that followed. There were a lot of hurt feelings on Valentine's Days during high school. I really hope my old school has come up with a better system.

Did your school do "Cupid Day" or something similar? How was it handled? Anyone have any current experience in high schools? I'd be curious to know how this tradition does (or does not) continue today.

I had exactly the same reaction while I was reading Before I Fall! First I thought that the tradition really was a bit silly, but then I remembered that I had the same (well, almost the same) thing at my school.

While it wasn't Cupid Day, there would be a big box (usually made of thick glass) and it would be placed in the school's main hallway. Kids would fill it with personal love notes, addressed to other boys or girls, and when that day ends, teachers would empty the glass box and give the notes to addressed recipients.

So, it wasn't anything glamorous, but a tradition it was And it was kinda lovely, now that I think of it. I can still remember the excitement when your teacher would hand you the note

You do know that Cupid Day is sort of related to Valentine's Day? The measures taken in the book could be closely associated with that. I think it is rather remarkable and cool to have a Cupid Day too. It's so sweet and loving. Put high school students and affection together. Perfect theme ever!

KateNox wrote:I had exactly the same reaction while I was reading Before I Fall! First I thought that the tradition really was a bit silly, but then I remembered that I had the same (well, almost the same) thing at my school.

While it wasn't Cupid Day, there would be a big box (usually made of thick glass) and it would be placed in the school's main hallway. Kids would fill it with personal love notes, addressed to other boys or girls, and when that day ends, teachers would empty the glass box and give the notes to addressed recipients.

So, it wasn't anything glamorous, but a tradition it was And it was kinda lovely, now that I think of it. I can still remember the excitement when your teacher would hand you the note

Did this ever backfire? Did the kids who got several notes tend to be the "popular" kids? Were kids who didn't receive any notes made to feel less-than by their note-receiving peers?

We didn't have those traditions, and still don't, and thought them silly as well.

Shelle wrote: Did this ever backfire? Did the kids who got several notes tend to be the "popular" kids? Were kids who didn't receive any notes made to feel less-than by their note-receiving peers?

Now that I think about it, it sure did backfire. If we are sensitive about this kind of stuff now, just imagine how we were in our teenage years. Yes, there were "popular" girls, and you could always guess who will get the note.

Never being one of the "popular" kids, I always thought my school's tradition was a little lame... around Valentine's Day, you could purchase a carnation to be delivered to your special someone at the end of the day. So it was always a game to see who would get the most carnations.

It always reminds me of that scene in the movie Mean Girls, where they're giving out candy canes and Gretchen Wieners doesn't get any.

emilyjune2011 wrote:Never being one of the "popular" kids, I always thought my school's tradition was a little lame... around Valentine's Day, you could purchase a carnation to be delivered to your special someone at the end of the day. So it was always a game to see who would get the most carnations.

It always reminds me of that scene in the movie Mean Girls, where they're giving out candy canes and Gretchen Wieners doesn't get any.

I can relate completely with what you're saying. I usually wouldn't get a card and I remember feeling really sad about it, especially when you get to watch how some girls get the cards. It's funny how these things affects us, and how we continue to carry those feelings with us.

My school didn't really have any traditions like Cupid Day. In grade school, we held a party every year for the major holidays. Valentine's Day was one of those and everyone was expected to give a card to the other classmates. I don't think I would have really liked having anything like that in high school. On a similar note, shortly after my oldest child was born and I was back at work, I found that another woman (whose daughter was born two days later) had a gigantic poster put up in the employee common area about the birth of her baby whereas I had nothing. I definitely felt left out and unappreciated. Of course, this was at a company that had over 100 employees, but considering everyone knew everyone, it was very obvious that both of us were pregnant at the same time and that only one of us received any sort of praise. In fact the first thing one of the higher-ups said to me was "I didn't even know you were coming back"... Ugh -_- We also had problems with people's birthdays being called over the loudspeaker. Not everyone's name would be called if they had a birthday. I knew of a couple people specifically asking to not have their name be called, but there were some people that missed out on the cool little celebration at work because they simply weren't "popular" enough.

In light of what I have said about my experiences, I don't necessarily think that a Cupid Day is all that bad, but I can see how it can hurt feelings.

Unfortunately, we had something exactly like "Cupid Day" for Valentine's Day. You purchased a "candy gram" at a table at lunch before Valentine's. On Valentine's Day, during fifth period (I believe), the candy grams were delivered. It was a red, pink, or purple construction paper heart with the message from the sender, who it was to, and a piece of candy attached. And yes, it was stupid and ridiculous because the popular kids would be delivered a whole sack and some people wouldn't get anything. I only got something one time, ad embarrassingly enough, it was from an older cousin at the school. They were only .50 cents, so it was easy for someone to get a whole bunch of them.

Both my high school and my college have Cupid Day-esque traditions. In high school, the items varied every year. One years we had roses, another we had singing valentines. The people who delivered them were from the student council, and the money that was raised went towards end of the year celebrations for each class. In college, they candy/roses/whatever were just delivered to your campus mailbox, because it's much harder to track people down to deliver items in-person. I don't remember either of them causing cliche wars, though.

My high school did singing valentines, which is similar to Cupid Day, except for the important detail that the valentines were distributed throughout the day, so that no one knew exactly who got one and who didn't. I feel like this tradition had negative and positive results, mostly positive. Since there wasn't any listing of who did or didn't get something, no one had to worry about what others might think of their apparent lack of popularity. This eliminates a good portion of a public popularity display from the tradition, and the only way to get ones feelings hurt is by not receiving one. However, no one ever got hurt since they didn't see very many people get one anyway.

Shelle wrote:"Cupid Day" at Thomas Jefferson High School plays a big role in Before I Fall. The whole tradition of Cupid Day seems very odd to me, almost like the school is deliberately allowing the "haves" to lord their status over the "have-nots" and those receiving fewer roses.

While reading the book, I thought that Cupid Day was stupid and no school would actually ever do anything like that. But then I thought back to my own high school days. I graduated in 1997, and while we didn't have a Cupid Day, the school did allow flowers, cards, balloons, etc. to be delivered to the office during class. Two minutes before the class bell rang, the school secretary would announce over the school-wide loudspeaker a list of students who needed to come to the office. It wasn't specifically announced that they had gifts waiting for them, but we all knew they did. I remember waiting in a full class, all the girls listening intently to the loud speaker, silently willing their names to be called, and the joy and disappointment that followed. There were a lot of hurt feelings on Valentine's Days during high school. I really hope my old school has come up with a better system.

Did your school do "Cupid Day" or something similar? How was it handled? Anyone have any current experience in high schools? I'd be curious to know how this tradition does (or does not) continue today.

My high school had Valentine grams or candy grams. You would get an order form and choose if you wanted to buy a bouquet of lollipops or a teddy bear or a bag of candy and filled it out with a note for the person your giving it too with your money. It also served as a fund raiser. I now work at the same school and they still do a similar thing although the items change from year to year. I think it did cause a little drama although i remember we used to just get stuff for our friends too so it wasn't just limited to a romantic type thing. That helped keep some of the hurt feelings away.

-- 09 Apr 2016, 11:31 --

abithacker wrote:My high school did singing valentines, which is similar to Cupid Day, except for the important detail that the valentines were distributed throughout the day, so that no one knew exactly who got one and who didn't. I feel like this tradition had negative and positive results, mostly positive. Since there wasn't any listing of who did or didn't get something, no one had to worry about what others might think of their apparent lack of popularity. This eliminates a good portion of a public popularity display from the tradition, and the only way to get ones feelings hurt is by not receiving one. However, no one ever got hurt since they didn't see very many people get one anyway.

I still work at the high school and went to and they just recently started doing singing valentines as well. I never thought about the aspect that when they are delivered throughout the day it does lessen the amount of embarrassment at not getting anything because not a lot of people are around to see. My school did that too.

My Middle and Elementary Schools were the only schools that I attended that really celebrated Valentines Day. They put aside the entire day to passing out Valentines and making Valentine based crafts or writing Valentine Based essays. In High School there were roses available to buy on campus, but otherwise people kind of ignored Valentine's Day.

It is always nice to have traditions for school. It builds lasting memories.