The author's approach to life?
- briellejee
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Re: The author's approach to life?
Agreed. One way or another I think the past taught us a lot of things.srividyag1 wrote: ↑01 Aug 2019, 11:53I agree with this. Sometimes, we blame those experiences, thinking probably it could have been better. But, if things had happened differently, we wouldn't have been what we are now.Jacquelyn-63 wrote: ↑24 Jul 2019, 10:42 I think it’s a combination. No one can ever completely reject their childhood. The only thing you can do is learn from it so that you want to change things. Those things are what turned you into the person you are today.
- briellejee
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Same, I guess any parent would want what's best for their child and their family. Looking back at his past experiences, I don't think anyone would want anyone, much more their family, to experience it as well.
- Kelyn
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He also shows us that although 'following his lead' to triumph over the difficulties in our own lives isn't going to be easy, it's definitely worth the effort in the end. Thanks so much for stopping in and commenting!supernatural143 wrote: ↑30 Jul 2019, 23:57 The author embraced his childhood, learned from it, tried hard to triumph over the adversities, and made sure his children won't experience the same.
He's amazing! He inspires readers to follow his lead.
- Kelyn
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Visible? Do you mean that his past enabled him to see that his future/present could be so much more than his past gave him? If so, I think that's a very interesting way of looking at it. I hadn't really thought of it from that angle. The deprivation of his childhood definitely gave him the desire to work to ensure that future generations would not experience the same. Thanks for stopping in and sharing your thoughts!
- Kelyn
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That could be seen as rejecting it and embracing it at the same time. He took from it the lessons he needed that would enable him to help his family rise above that deprivation and left behind the parts that would hold him back. I appreciate you stopping in and sharing your thoughts!
- briellejee
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Same here. I wasn't able to look at that with this perspective. Well, if he did see it that way, it only means that from the start he had set his mind on his goals, and also a good dose of optimism!Kelyn wrote: ↑02 Aug 2019, 00:36Visible? Do you mean that his past enabled him to see that his future/present could be so much more than his past gave him? If so, I think that's a very interesting way of looking at it. I hadn't really thought of it from that angle. The deprivation of his childhood definitely gave him the desire to work to ensure that future generations would not experience the same. Thanks for stopping in and sharing your thoughts!
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― Gail Honeyman, Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine
- Kelyn
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Indeed! I think that's the outcome every parent hopes for. As children or often even as young adults, we have great difficulty seeing past the "bad" things that happened with our parents. It takes a bit more maturity and perhaps becoming a parent yourself before you can gain that insight. Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts with us!
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He definitely overcame a great many obstacles in his life, one of which was his extreme poverty as a child. It seemed, though, despite the poverty, he did come from a loving and encouraging family. I'm thinking of his Mom's reaction to his reading and studying. I don't think that sheer determination was all it took to reach the goals he attained. I believe he had to also be a very intelligent person. That is shown in how he dealt with his suicidal thoughts as a child. Only a very intelligent person could reason in such a manner, especially as a child.Kelyn wrote: ↑19 Jul 2019, 22:16 I read somewhere once that a person reacts in one of two ways to their childhood. You either embrace it and learn from it or you reject it and live your life in a way that will ensure you (and your future family) never return to that state of living again. In my opinion, the author seems to have managed to do both. He definitely learned from his childhood experiences in that it helped him develop both determination and an intense desire to succeed; but he also 'rose through the ranks', so to speak, in a way that ensured that his family (wife and children) never experienced anything even remotely like the deprivation he experienced in childhood. In my own experience, it's almost impossible to totally reject one's upbringing, even if it held unfortunate or even adverse experiences. Based on what you read of the author's life, which do you think he did? Or was it a combination of both?
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Very true. I hadn't thought of it in quite those terms. I think the Mom was a bit mercuric. On the one hand, she was encouraging about his reading and studying but then, on the other, she would beat him just on the say-so of his Aunt without even trying to find out his side of it or what actually happened. I do agree that he was a very intelligent individual. Thanks for stopping in and commenting!DC Brown wrote: ↑07 Aug 2019, 10:03 He definitely overcame a great many obstacles in his life, one of which was his extreme poverty as a child. It seemed, though, despite the poverty, he did come from a loving and encouraging family. I'm thinking of his Mom's reaction to his reading and studying. I don't think that sheer determination was all it took to reach the goals he attained. I believe he had to also be a very intelligent person. That is shown in how he dealt with his suicidal thoughts as a child. Only a very intelligent person could reason in such a manner, especially as a child.
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I agree with both of you. I realize there are exceptions as in the case of abuse, but I think most parents do the best they can for their kids given their own upbringing, which often is a significant factor.Kelyn wrote: ↑24 Jul 2019, 22:25I think that's the hope of every parent. "You'll appreciate this when you're older," isn't a saying for nothing! I know as a parent myself that I've made plenty of mistakes, but I hope that my kids will (eventually) see that I did my best, appreciate what I did do right, and forgive me for the mistakes I made. Thanks for stopping in and commenting!
- Kelyn
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Yes, there are definitely exceptions and, all-to-often, society doesn't catch them until it's too late. Then, that cycle passes on to the next generation. In this case, however, even if the mother wasn't overly 'loving' toward the author (after all, she beat him regularly on just the word of his Aunt), I think she was trying to do her best by him. Thanks so much for stopping in and commenting!Cecilia_L wrote: ↑10 Aug 2019, 07:29I agree with both of you. I realize there are exceptions as in the case of abuse, but I think most parents do the best they can for their kids given their own upbringing, which often is a significant factor.Kelyn wrote: ↑24 Jul 2019, 22:25
I think that's the hope of every parent. "You'll appreciate this when you're older," isn't a saying for nothing! I know as a parent myself that I've made plenty of mistakes, but I hope that my kids will (eventually) see that I did my best, appreciate what I did do right, and forgive me for the mistakes I made. Thanks for stopping in and commenting!
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