Carly and Kane's friendship

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Howlan
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Re: Carly and Kane's friendship

Post by Howlan »

B Creech wrote: 01 Feb 2020, 16:18 Carly and Kane formed a close friendship and hung out together sometimes. Kane knew that Carly and Adam were a couple, but he kept hoping Carly would fall for him. The night her aunt was out of town, and Carly invited Kane over for dinner, and he kissed her, was she justified in her reaction of slapping him? Or do you feel she brought it on herself? I feel like she dressed to get his attention with her pink off-the-shoulder sweater. They snuggled up together on the couch, so when he was leaving and kissed her before he went out the door, and she slapped him, I felt like it was a little too harsh. What are your thoughts on this? Was Carly right in how she handled the kiss? Was there a better way to handle the situation between friends?
I think what Carly did was totally justified. You can not force yourself on any girl. And right from the start, Carly's intentions were clear as the narration was in the first person. She wanted Kane as a good friend and not as a lover. As for her dress she can wear whatever she wants to.
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Post by Howlan »

LV2R wrote: 02 Feb 2020, 00:35 I can see how Kane would be thrown off a bit from being invited over and being a close friend to Carly. I do not think Carly should have slapped him, but that was her first reaction to what she thought Kane had crossed over a boundary set in her mind. Maybe this would be a lesson to Carly on how to remain friends, but more careful how time would be spent together from then on.
I think Kane should definitely have made things clear before leaning in her the kiss. It is his fault for getting slapped.
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Post by Howlan »

DragonLight877 wrote: 02 Feb 2020, 22:20 I think Kane knew she was in a relationship. Just because Carly chose to wear a sweater, that doesn't mean Kane just gets to forget that Carly is in a relationship. Now I wouldn't say she should have resorted to violence, but all of that anger is fair, because Carly is the one who felt the guilt when faced by Adam again. It was wrong for Kane to take advantage of her in that way. No matter what she had on, or how she fell asleep accidentally.
Yes, I agree. Never mind what she had on or whatever relationship she was in, you take permission from a girl before getting intimate.
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Post by Howlan »

skindrukas wrote: 02 Feb 2020, 11:47
B Creech wrote: 01 Feb 2020, 16:18 Carly and Kane formed a close friendship and hung out together sometimes. Kane knew that Carly and Adam were a couple, but he kept hoping Carly would fall for him. The night her aunt was out of town, and Carly invited Kane over for dinner, and he kissed her, was she justified in her reaction of slapping him? Or do you feel she brought it on herself? I feel like she dressed to get his attention with her pink off-the-shoulder sweater. They snuggled up together on the couch, so when he was leaving and kissed her before he went out the door, and she slapped him, I felt like it was a little too harsh. What are your thoughts on this? Was Carly right in how she handled the kiss? Was there a better way to handle the situation between friends?
I think she provoked this on herself. And talking more deeply... I know it's just a book. But what it teaches kids? In real life, if a girl doesn't want to be kissed, she won't be. That's if the boy isn't abusive... I mean, I've watched nowadays kids and noticed attitude of girls. As if they don't want attention, but they do. I think they caught it in movies and books lol
I think that no matter who it is boys or girls they want to look good. So if you are in a relationship it does not restrict you what you can wear or how you dress. Everyone likes to be complimented. It does not mean that you can get intimate with her.
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Post by skindrukas »

Howlan wrote: 03 Feb 2020, 04:59
skindrukas wrote: 02 Feb 2020, 11:47
B Creech wrote: 01 Feb 2020, 16:18 Carly and Kane formed a close friendship and hung out together sometimes. Kane knew that Carly and Adam were a couple, but he kept hoping Carly would fall for him. The night her aunt was out of town, and Carly invited Kane over for dinner, and he kissed her, was she justified in her reaction of slapping him? Or do you feel she brought it on herself? I feel like she dressed to get his attention with her pink off-the-shoulder sweater. They snuggled up together on the couch, so when he was leaving and kissed her before he went out the door, and she slapped him, I felt like it was a little too harsh. What are your thoughts on this? Was Carly right in how she handled the kiss? Was there a better way to handle the situation between friends?
I think she provoked this on herself. And talking more deeply... I know it's just a book. But what it teaches kids? In real life, if a girl doesn't want to be kissed, she won't be. That's if the boy isn't abusive... I mean, I've watched nowadays kids and noticed attitude of girls. As if they don't want attention, but they do. I think they caught it in movies and books lol
I think that no matter who it is boys or girls they want to look good. So if you are in a relationship it does not restrict you what you can wear or how you dress. Everyone likes to be complimented. It does not mean that you can get intimate with her.
True, I strongly agree. One should be wearing whatever he or she likes or sees right in certain situations. But I wasn't talking about the clothes, although it might seem highlighted in the book. I meant that if you don't want to do something, your face and body language will tell that. Or it should. At least that's what I'm gonna teach my kids.
The temple bell stops but I still hear the sound coming out of the flowers. --- Matsuo Basho
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Post by DragonLight877 »

skindrukas wrote: 03 Feb 2020, 09:08
Howlan wrote: 03 Feb 2020, 04:59
skindrukas wrote: 02 Feb 2020, 11:47

I think she provoked this on herself. And talking more deeply... I know it's just a book. But what it teaches kids? In real life, if a girl doesn't want to be kissed, she won't be. That's if the boy isn't abusive... I mean, I've watched nowadays kids and noticed attitude of girls. As if they don't want attention, but they do. I think they caught it in movies and books lol
I think that no matter who it is boys or girls they want to look good. So if you are in a relationship it does not restrict you what you can wear or how you dress. Everyone likes to be complimented. It does not mean that you can get intimate with her.
True, I strongly agree. One should be wearing whatever he or she likes or sees right in certain situations. But I wasn't talking about the clothes, although it might seem highlighted in the book. I meant that if you don't want to do something, your face and body language will tell that. Or it should. At least that's what I'm gonna teach my kids.
I don't believe she was being flirty with Kane, only friendly. And Kane should know she is in a relationship. Don't try to get with people who are taken. If he wanted to tell Carly how he felt, he should have just told her if that was what he really wanted.
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Post by Howlan »

skindrukas wrote: 03 Feb 2020, 09:08
Howlan wrote: 03 Feb 2020, 04:59
skindrukas wrote: 02 Feb 2020, 11:47

I think she provoked this on herself. And talking more deeply... I know it's just a book. But what it teaches kids? In real life, if a girl doesn't want to be kissed, she won't be. That's if the boy isn't abusive... I mean, I've watched nowadays kids and noticed attitude of girls. As if they don't want attention, but they do. I think they caught it in movies and books lol
I think that no matter who it is boys or girls they want to look good. So if you are in a relationship it does not restrict you what you can wear or how you dress. Everyone likes to be complimented. It does not mean that you can get intimate with her.
True, I strongly agree. One should be wearing whatever he or she likes or sees right in certain situations. But I wasn't talking about the clothes, although it might seem highlighted in the book. I meant that if you don't want to do something, your face and body language will tell that. Or it should. At least that's what I'm gonna teach my kids.
The bottom line is you want to intimate with someone, take mutual consent.
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Post by Brenda Creech »

Howlan wrote: 03 Feb 2020, 04:49
B Creech wrote: 01 Feb 2020, 16:18 Carly and Kane formed a close friendship and hung out together sometimes. Kane knew that Carly and Adam were a couple, but he kept hoping Carly would fall for him. The night her aunt was out of town, and Carly invited Kane over for dinner, and he kissed her, was she justified in her reaction of slapping him? Or do you feel she brought it on herself? I feel like she dressed to get his attention with her pink off-the-shoulder sweater. They snuggled up together on the couch, so when he was leaving and kissed her before he went out the door, and she slapped him, I felt like it was a little too harsh. What are your thoughts on this? Was Carly right in how she handled the kiss? Was there a better way to handle the situation between friends?
I think what Carly did was totally justified. You can not force yourself on any girl. And right from the start, Carly's intentions were clear as the narration was in the first person. She wanted Kane as a good friend and not as a lover. As for her dress she can wear whatever she wants to.
Thanks for the input! I love hearing everyone's thoughts! :)
B. Creech
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Post by Brenda Creech »

Jachike Samuelson wrote: 03 Feb 2020, 04:43 I'm not on either side of this one. Carly may have been suggestive with her wardrobe choice and behavior around Kane. But they both knew that Carly was with someone else. So I think they were both at fault for the kiss and the slap. The better solution would have been setting boundaries to their friendship long before they got to the snuggle/slap point.
Very well said! Thanks for commenting! :tiphat:
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Post by Brenda Creech »

Howlan wrote: 03 Feb 2020, 11:10
skindrukas wrote: 03 Feb 2020, 09:08
Howlan wrote: 03 Feb 2020, 04:59

I think that no matter who it is boys or girls they want to look good. So if you are in a relationship it does not restrict you what you can wear or how you dress. Everyone likes to be complimented. It does not mean that you can get intimate with her.
True, I strongly agree. One should be wearing whatever he or she likes or sees right in certain situations. But I wasn't talking about the clothes, although it might seem highlighted in the book. I meant that if you don't want to do something, your face and body language will tell that. Or it should. At least that's what I'm gonna teach my kids.
The bottom line is you want to intimate with someone, take mutual consent.
These are all such great points! Thank you guys for your input!
B. Creech
"Like beauty in the eyes, the divinity of the rose may be in the nose that smells it, and the lover that beholds it." Eckhart Aurelius Hughes
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Post by Daniel Muky »

Girls love to show off...always, be it she wants you or not...and boys just can't learn that...but both were wrong according to me...
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Post by Brenda Creech »

Daniel Muky wrote: 03 Feb 2020, 17:55 Girls love to show off...always, be it she wants you or not...and boys just can't learn that...but both were wrong according to me...
Exactly! Kane knew Carly was all about Adam, and Carly knew Kane had a crush on her so they both were accountable in their own way. Thanks for commenting!
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Post by Nerea »

I think Carly was acting sexy in a harsh manner by slapping Kane. There doesn't seem to be anything wrong with the slap.
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Post by Jocelyn Eastman »

An off the shoulder sweater is called fashion not an invitation to be kissed. Also, platonic friends do cuddle.

Personally, I thought she was justified in slapping him. He knew she was in a relationship with Adam and made the choice to make a move. It’s HIS fault he got slapped.
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Post by skindrukas »

I don't know if that's true but my brother taught me that there's no such thing as platonic friendship between men and women. Not from a man’s side anyway. I've been remembering this lesson and never got into "physical" trouble despite my looks =D
The temple bell stops but I still hear the sound coming out of the flowers. --- Matsuo Basho
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