I've written a song, need feedback

[Twilight_2_Midnight]

Okay, so I write a lot of songs in my spare time, but since I've started using this site again I thought I should share it with all you guys on t'internet and see what you think. Constructive criticism is completely welcome, just please try not to be too nasty... Us vampires have feelings too by the way, imagine this with a kind of country/rock/alternative tune...well I'm not sure how to describe the tune really, so imagine it how you want. Oh, and it's called "A Town Called Misery". Here goes:
In a small town called Misery there is a girl called Rain
She says she can control the weather
It's always raining in that small town called misery
She says it'll be raining forever
And when people cry and say it's all her fault
She just smiles sadly and walks away
Oh and if you tell her why that town's called Misery
She just says "I know, that's why it's raining today"
That little girl with the storm grey eyes
Who says she can control the weather
She seems innocent enough, perhaps a bit mysterious
But that's until you get to know her
Cos when I cry and I say it's all her fault
She smiles sadly and walks away, go away
Oh and I told her why that small town is called Misery
She said "I know, that's why it's raining today:
Oh Rain, Rain
Go away
Why don't you come back some other day?
Oh no, Rain
Go away
Why don't you never come back at all?
So if you try
And she knows it's her fault
She'll smile
But she won't do anything
Yeah that's why it's raining
Today
Oh today
It's raining today
And that's why it's raining today
In a small town called Misery there is a girl called Rain
We all know she can control the weather
Cos it's always raining in that small town called Misery
I heard her say it'll rain forever
Oh Rain
Please go away
Just come back some other day
If you'd listen
If you could see
You going now is best for you
And me
Oh please
For me
Rain, go away
Go away, Rain
Away, away
Far far far away
And if you cry and say it's all her fault
She will smile sadly and walk away
If you tell her what that small town's called Misery
She says "I know, that's why it's raining today"

[louisgeorge]

lyrics !!! just awesome... but if someone sing it then i can tell you how is it ...

[AmandaRose]

It's very unique! It's definitely not something I've read before in lyrics, which is pretty refreshing. In my personal opinion, the story is a bit of a downer; I only say this because I am an upbeat person. Sometimes, to help lighten the mood of the song, you can but a good beat to it. I've heard songs before that are not so cheerful, but have a cheerful sound to it. It's almost confusing because you want to smile until you listen to the words; it might be fun to do that!

[Noxeelove]

Very unique. Great song would love to hear it someday.

[smaudy44]

I like the lyrics - they seem to be melancholic, but I like listening to melancholic songs anyway You should come up with a tune and post it

[Nathrad Sheare]

A creative song. It seems like the kind that would be put to piano and a small synthesizer orchestral mix. I want to see another one! Post another one! Please! Please! Please! My imagination! Oh, my imagination!!!