Interracial Marriage

Use this forum to discuss the September 2020 Book of the month, " "Kalayla" by Jeannie Nicholas.
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rondanoh1
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Re: Interracial Marriage

Post by rondanoh1 »

Interracial marriages are much more accepted everywhere in the US than they used to be. At the time period of the story it was less accepted and, I think there are some areas where it is still regarded with suspicion. This is especially evident in areas where there are fewer of one race in general. In diverse metropolitan areas bi-racial children are accepted without question. In more rural areas where there are fewer of one race or the other, that may not be the case. I think Kalayla's situation came from her and her mother not being accepted by her grandparents. Without the support of extended family it made it much harder for them. It put them at a disadvantage socially and economically which was the bigger problem.

It is sad when children and grandchildren are not accepted for who they are. I have bi-racial grandchildren and I cannot imagine my life without them or their parents. Fortunately, we live in an area where they are not experiencing discrimination due to race. I'm not sure that would be the case if they lived in a small town in the U.S. where there are few black or white people in general. My kids seemed to be looked upon as a curiosity or even as an abomination as a mixed-race couple when visiting the small towns where my husband and I grew up. Their children were more accepted when visiting the same places with just us, their grandparents. It is my hope that one day this will all be a moot point.
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Post by Joseph_ngaruiya »

rondanoh1 wrote: 06 Sep 2020, 11:23 Interracial marriages are much more accepted everywhere in the US than they used to be. At the time period of the story it was less accepted and, I think there are some areas where it is still regarded with suspicion. This is especially evident in areas where there are fewer of one race in general. In diverse metropolitan areas bi-racial children are accepted without question. In more rural areas where there are fewer of one race or the other, that may not be the case. I think Kalayla's situation came from her and her mother not being accepted by her grandparents. Without the support of extended family it made it much harder for them. It put them at a disadvantage socially and economically which was the bigger problem.

It is sad when children and grandchildren are not accepted for who they are. I have bi-racial grandchildren and I cannot imagine my life without them or their parents. Fortunately, we live in an area where they are not experiencing discrimination due to race. I'm not sure that would be the case if they lived in a small town in the U.S. where there are few black or white people in general. My kids seemed to be looked upon as a curiosity or even as an abomination as a mixed-race couple when visiting the small towns where my husband and I grew up. Their children were more accepted when visiting the same places with just us, their grandparents. It is my hope that one day this will all be a moot point.
Reading from your input, I agree that parental support for bi-racial children is crucial. Apart from Kalayla's wait-and-see attitude, her mother's support keeps her moving forward with confidence. If at all she had faced any issues during the week because of her race, the Sunday Morning talks would have been an opportunity for her to get assistance from Maureen.
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Post by Wesley Friday »

Interracial marriages are presently more acceptable than they were in the past. From an idealistic point of view, they should actually be encouraged in order to unify the entire human species (by reduction in segregation based on race and the creation of homogeneity) in its strive towards advancement. However, the facts on the ground may be far away from our ideals.
Although marriage is romanticized as a union between two persons who have fallen in love, in most parts of the world as well as historically, it is and has always been a union between two families. Interracial marriages, just like any other marriages, need the strong support of families from both sides to thrive.
The story of Maureen is a sad but clear example of how the disapproval of one family of the union can result in moments of loneliness, and the absence of a much needed emotional base for support during hard times. I don't believe that an interracial marriage was responsible solely for Maureen's experiences. What was actually responsible was the human factor in the equation, how her family responded to the union as well as the unforeseen events which happened subsequently.
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Post by dm1971 »

The days of racism should be over by now, so yeah, I have nothing against interracial marriage. I do think that some of the issues (not all) Kalayla faces is due to the racist actions of other people.
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Post by Joseph_ngaruiya »

Wesley Friday wrote: 06 Sep 2020, 20:46 Interracial marriages are presently more acceptable than they were in the past. From an idealistic point of view, they should actually be encouraged in order to unify the entire human species (by reduction in segregation based on race and the creation of homogeneity) in its strive towards advancement. However, the facts on the ground may be far away from our ideals.
Although marriage is romanticized as a union between two persons who have fallen in love, in most parts of the world as well as historically, it is and has always been a union between two families. Interracial marriages, just like any other marriages, need the strong support of families from both sides to thrive.
The story of Maureen is a sad but clear example of how the disapproval of one family of the union can result in moments of loneliness, and the absence of a much needed emotional base for support during hard times. I don't believe that an interracial marriage was responsible solely for Maureen's experiences. What was actually responsible was the human factor in the equation, how her family responded to the union as well as the unforeseen events which happened subsequently.
Your view on marriage as being a union between two families changed my previous assumptions. I never saw it that way. Indeed, the support of families from both sides is required. When it doesn't happen, you'll find couples seeking assistance from other channels. It could be a good reason why Lucinda was active in her community, sensitizing about rights for blacks.
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Post by Joseph_ngaruiya »

david_martinez wrote: 06 Sep 2020, 22:21 The days of racism should be over by now, so yeah, I have nothing against interracial marriage. I do think that some of the issues (not all) Kalayla faces is due to the racist actions of other people.
Getting rid of racism will take time. It, therefore, requires patience. In areas where the situation is worse, adaptation is the solution. Jamal came from an old, established black family that survived by keeping a low profile in a mixed-race neighborhood in Cambridge.
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Post by Christabel Uzoamaka »

Interracial relationships in modern times are definitely more acceptable and even craved by many people. However, it can create an identity problem within a mixed offspring. So far as these issues are handled properly, I don’t see why interracial relationships should not be accepted.
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Post by NDeMeer »

Though there are still some differences across the world, interracial marriage is definitely acceptable and it should be acceptable everywhere. However, I do believe you have a point when you say it could have caused some difficulties for Kalayla, depending on how people in her life have reacted to the fact that she is biracial. In this case however, it seems that her issues have more to do with the loss (or lack) of a father, and with the family's poverty.
Happy reading! :techie-studyingbrown:
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Post by Joseph_ngaruiya »

Christieee wrote: 07 Sep 2020, 07:58 Interracial relationships in modern times are definitely more acceptable and even craved by many people. However, it can create an identity problem within a mixed offspring. So far as these issues are handled properly, I don’t see why interracial relationships should not be accepted.
I agree with you. To an extent, I think Kalayla's attitude is formed from the struggle of deciding on which side she should follow. Also, apart from interracial marriages being accepted, the location and environment where a child lives are crucial. These factors determine how the child grows and responds to issues.
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Post by Joseph_ngaruiya »

NDeMeer wrote: 07 Sep 2020, 08:37 Though there are still some differences across the world, interracial marriage is definitely acceptable and it should be acceptable everywhere. However, I do believe you have a point when you say it could have caused some difficulties for Kalayla, depending on how people in her life have reacted to the fact that she is biracial. In this case however, it seems that her issues have more to do with the loss (or lack) of a father, and with the family's poverty.
Very true. Lena describes how Kalayla tied a rope to her baggy pants to keep them up. That shows their poverty levels. Remember Kalayla is born in a similar interracial community. In conclusion, it's easier to adapt to a new community that accepts interracial marriages if you grew up in one.
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Post by eddhee_ »

Interracial marriages have not been generally accepted. A lot of people have their reservations on this subject. I agree that some of the issues Kalayla faced are results of opinions from racist.
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Post by Joseph_ngaruiya »

Although Kalayla suffers that part of the sorrow. Jeannie shows us that parental guidance plays a role in how kids grow and that can affect how they perceive and deal with issues. From the time JJ was four and Mark was three, Joey told JJ his job as the oldest was to toughen up his younger brother, which JJ did by using Mark as his personal punching bag.
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Post by mmandy38 »

I think that interracial marriages should be accepted, and they are definitely more accepted than they were in times past. I just don't think we are at a time in our world that they are very socially accepted unfortunately.
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Post by Bertha Jackson »

Unfortunately, I still see instances of racism in our world today. In the workplace I have seen individuals looked over because they were in a bi-racial relationship. Of course no one admits it, but it is there. Fortunately, it has gotten better over the last few years, but it is not gone.
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Post by Joseph_ngaruiya »

Bertha Jackson wrote: 09 Sep 2020, 21:20 Unfortunately, I still see instances of racism in our world today. In the workplace I have seen individuals looked over because they were in a bi-racial relationship. Of course no one admits it, but it is there. Fortunately, it has gotten better over the last few years, but it is not gone.
mmandy38 wrote: 09 Sep 2020, 14:31 I think that interracial marriages should be accepted, and they are definitely more accepted than they were in times past. I just don't think we are at a time in our world that they are very socially accepted unfortunately.
Interracial marriages and relationships are becoming widely accepted by the day. Unfortunately, so are broken families. It is therefore advisable to spend more time learning a soulmate before accepting them for marriage. Parental skills are a big influence to child behaviours. If you get a spouse who doesn't observe good morals the kids pick up from them. Mark picked from his dad's example and fighting over aggravations became the story of his life.
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