Everything else could wait...or could it?

Use this forum to discuss the May 2021 Book of the month, "Surviving the Business of Healthcare: Knowledge is Power" by Barbara Galutia Regis PA-C
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Pallavi Lakra
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Re: Everything else could wait...or could it?

Post by Pallavi Lakra »

Chronologically, she had a job she loved before having the baby, and it is certain that she is good at it so just because she continues with the job even after having a kid is not a good way to weigh the situation to see if she did the right thing. She is multi-tasking now because now she is a mother, a wife and at the same time she is a medical help.
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Post by jeanmtdb »

There's no easy answer to this question. Is Spock right when he said, "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few". Or is Norm Kelly right when he said, "You can't pour from an empty cup"? I think a delicate balance that works for the person and their family is best, but if you don't take care of yourself, you may not be around to take care of anyone else.
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Post by Caroline Anne Richmond »

The author sees her job as her vocation and passion, so by not doing this job may have affected her mental health adversely. It is however important to find balance in life and take time to take care of yourself and your family, although this balance takes a lot of care to fine tune.
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Post by Nqobile Mashinini Tshabalala »

I'd personally want the author to be my healthcare provider. She really cares for her patients and understands that they deserve to be treated with care and dignity although she is in business. With that said, it seems she went over and beyond. While that is amazing and commendable, failure to balance responsibilities in life leads to devastation in some parts of your life. I don't think she could have avoided cancer but she might have noticed some changes a little sooner had she not put herself in the back seat.
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Post by Archaeoptery »

Your first question does not exactly make sense to me. How I see cancer is you can take you steps to avoid it or lessen the risks but in the end that may not matter.
Your second question is something I understand somewhat. To keep your job you can not really do it halfheartedly since depending on it will probably make you lose it (Linking this to me doing the reviews). She was doing something she loved and her husband was in support of it. Should not everyone be supported of someone doing what they love? by rights it looks like she was not doing any harm with her family about it.
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Post by Durgeshwari Dolas »

I always remind myself that at deathbed I don't want to regret that I haven't lived the life i should have.
In priorities are very important. What's your priority is how your life goings to turn but that doesn't mean in midst of just focusing on them you ignore yourself or your health. Because if you yourself aren't healthy then how are you going to do anything? Anything other can wait but that anything isn't your life! We human being are good at multitasking we really are, by that I don't think there'll be any problem for finding a little time for yourself.
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Post by Da Rafi »

It depends on how we react to it, try to avoid those that can be a problem, sometimes other people don't understand how our condition is.
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Post by Natalia Nazeem »

The great (and scary) thing about life is that it's a mixed bag - there's no telling whether the protagonist's prognosis would have been better if they dedicated more time to their own health; it might have helped, or it might have had the same result regardless of what they tried to achieve. At the end of the day, it depends on what each person tries to prefer. Me, I know I would choose family - but for someone who may have a toxic family and loves what they do, or for someone who's built their own close circle of friends from work, might prefer their career over their family. That's okay, too. I guess as long as you're able to go to sleep at night, knowing that you've done your best for yourself and the ones you care about (you don't have to be related by blood to care deeply about someone, and you don't have to care deeply about the ones who are related to you by blood), then that's as good as it gets.
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Post by Chigo Nwagboso »

Yes, no doubt about people being passionate about their job and vision. But, for me it takes a healthy person to care for others and deliver his/her job effectively. Her family and healthy are very vital to be neglected. I think there's need to strike a balance.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

Worm Reader wrote: 02 Jun 2021, 10:52 I believe that cancer is not something that can be completely avoided; for her, the patients and her career were more important. Perhaps she spends a lot of time healing others rather than herself, but why should she regret it if that is truly her calling? I don't believe she won t have cancer if she set aside more time for herself.
No one can avoid cancer by looking after one's own self. But here she describes how she saw the swelling on her arm, and had thoughts of it whether it is a benign or a malignant lesion. If she spared some time and went and show it to a doctor for a second opinion, it could have been diagnosed far more early.

May be Medicine and treating for patients was her calling, but how can that suppress the priority to her own health?
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Post by S P »

I think that everyone prioritises different things in life. I don't think that prioritising work over family made her a bad person - and it certainly doesn't make her more likely to get cancer. However, it's always good to bear in mind the effect that your choices have on the people you care about - if she neglects her family in favour of her work, they might feel sad that their relationship with her is suffering. That being said, her work involved helping people and saving lives, which is arguably very important as well.
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Post by cd20 »

I think it is a hard call. The reality is the better we take care of ourselves the better we can care for others (because we would be healthy). The reality is we often put others before ourselves. I am guilty of it. I have always taken better care of my children and husband than I do myself. However, I will not take care of career things better than I take care of myself. We each have to strike a balance that works for us.
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Post by tafta »

Sushan wrote: 01 Jun 2021, 07:24
Vishnu Priya B wrote: 01 Jun 2021, 01:47 I've always wondered how much time I have. What if my life ends the next minute? Will I regret it? The fact is I won't if I've lived a happy life. By happy, I don't mean the standards set by society but doing the things that would genuinely make me happy.
Not everyone has the same kind of priorities. For instance, I prioritise my family. Some people give more importance to their career. Likewise, the author found her happiness in caring for her patients. She clearly mentions it was her calling.
My take: prioritise whatever makes you happy. Everything else can wait... Of course!
It is up to you to choose your own priorities. And if they make you happy your life will be complete. But as a social being we are inevitably bound to our families. So if one has made his career the priority and his family the second, it may cause the family to suffer. He may rise in his career, but will get distant from his close ones. What completeness will be there in such a life :?:
I'm in agreement with you there, as much as one may value their career, family should always rank higher than career on the priority list. One's health even higher. I think neglecting one's self and those closest to a person claiming fulfilment in a career and in caring for patients is in a way hypocritical and selfish. Care for yourself well first to then you can be available to look after others.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

Jagiine wrote: 02 Jun 2021, 12:45
Vishnu Priya B wrote: 01 Jun 2021, 01:47 I've always wondered how much time I have. What if my life ends the next minute? Will I regret it? The fact is I won't if I've lived a happy life. By happy, I don't mean the standards set by society but doing the things that would genuinely make me happy.
Not everyone has the same kind of priorities. For instance, I prioritise my family. Some people give more importance to their career. Likewise, the author found her happiness in caring for her patients. She clearly mentions it was her calling.
My take: prioritise whatever makes you happy. Everything else can wait... Of course!
This is definitely what I was thinking! Priorities are personal and should be treated as such. There are some things which we should attend to that are not number one on our lists (e.g. for me, taking a shower doesn't make me happy), but they can be balanced out with the real pleasures.
There are things that we do because we like them, and somethings we do either as a routine or a responsibility, though we do not like them much. Anyone can pursue their passions. But one should not forget one's responsibilities or one's own self when caring for others. There is something called being selfless, but that does not mean neglecting one's self.
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Post by Sushan Ekanayake »

Vishnu Priya B wrote: 02 Jun 2021, 14:01
Sushan wrote: 01 Jun 2021, 07:24
Vishnu Priya B wrote: 01 Jun 2021, 01:47 I've always wondered how much time I have. What if my life ends the next minute? Will I regret it? The fact is I won't if I've lived a happy life. By happy, I don't mean the standards set by society but doing the things that would genuinely make me happy.
Not everyone has the same kind of priorities. For instance, I prioritise my family. Some people give more importance to their career. Likewise, the author found her happiness in caring for her patients. She clearly mentions it was her calling.
My take: prioritise whatever makes you happy. Everything else can wait... Of course!
It is up to you to choose your own priorities. And if they make you happy your life will be complete. But as a social being we are inevitably bound to our families. So if one has made his career the priority and his family the second, it may cause the family to suffer. He may rise in his career, but will get distant from his close ones. What completeness will be there in such a life :?:
Of course, your family will suffer. But that doesn't mean you won't be living a complete life. Think about great leaders and freedom fighters. They dreamt of freedom and equality for others. They fought for it. Which in turn made them feel complete. Do you think their families didn't suffer? Yet they did what they did, why? Because that was their calling.

So, yup! Everything else can wait. Wait but not be abandoned! There's a difference.
We here only such stories which ended up in success. There were great leaders who pursued their callings on the expense of their families. As they ended up in success, all of them and their families gained something for the problems they faced. But what about the thousands of others who failed in such endeavours? They gained nothing for themselves or their families rather than an eternal suffering. That is why I say in whatever the circumstances you have to balance your personal life with your work life
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