Zia Lennox, is she a sexaholic?
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Re: Zia Lennox, is she a sexaholic?
I am not sure whether 'confident' is the correct word for that. Let's say she just loved sex and went after that. But was she confident in what she did? Or did she just gave herself in to her bodily needs? I think she went for a unethical relationship because she needed sex too much. If so is it wrong to name her a sexaholic?Black Jewel wrote: ↑04 Aug 2021, 04:42 I do not believe that she is a sexaholic. Some women just love sex, and are confident enough to go after it when and how they want. I believe Zia is one of these women.
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She might have feared to refuse. But we can't say she just could not hurt the feelings of the other and gave herself in to sex. She enjoyed it too. We clearly see how her body reacted when she first met Bryce. That was with no seduction at all. Maybe her anxiety inhibited her from making clear decisions. But in the sexual relationships we cannot say Zia was innocent.Karlee Berrios wrote: ↑04 Aug 2021, 09:50 I don’t think she’s a sexaholic. I think her anxiety and fear of rejection make her afraid to say no. I’m almost done with the book and there’s a scene where it is very clear she doesn’t want to be doing the things she’s doing, but she’s almost too frozen in fear to stop it. And the people who pursue her in that way definitely cross the line from seduction into coercion.
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One can be confident when one does the correct thing. Zia very well knew that she was doing a wrong thing. How can she be confident to be wrong? And at the same time we have to keep in mind about her anxiety disorder, and that is exactly opposite to being confident. Maybe she was too naive to go into a wrong method to satisfy her needs. Or she might have taken that decision out of anxiety. But definitely not out of confidence. She may not be a sexaholic, but her character was not built up as a confident one either.Abisolalawal wrote: ↑04 Aug 2021, 10:39 I think we need not mistake confidence for sexaholic. I believe having confidence to go for what you want is sexy in a way but I wouldn't confine Zia to being a sexaholic.
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It is her own family that have named her anti-social and introvert. Despite her best friend's all efforts Zia remain introvert. But we see that she harbouring sexual desires which she could not fulfill in the past because of her character qualities. But then she get into a relationship in which she can fulfill her desires, and she simply gives herself in for her emotions, keeping away logical reasoning.Kavita Shah wrote: ↑04 Aug 2021, 14:15 She's trying to make up for what she lacks in her personal life and she isn't anti-social. So she isn't an introvert and not sexaholic. Zia is blinded by lust and not able to see the true lovers which also says that she is controlled by her emotions.
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Zia was loved and respected by Bryce. He did not had sex with her but that was her choice, and Zia did not conveyed her needs to him as well. Maybe that was because of her anxiety. Yet she could overcome her anxiety and go towards Baxter to fulfill her sexual needs. Maybe that is not what sexaholics do. But that is not how sexually empowered female should act as well, by cheating her lover.Maddie Atkinson wrote: ↑06 Aug 2021, 07:51 Sex can be incredibly empowering for women, so I do not think that sexaholic is the correct word. She may be introverted but women like to have sex as much as men and if they are comfortable with someone then we are willing to let the introvertedness go and embrace our sexuality, even those who have social anxiety. I think that is more like what Zia's character is like, sexaholic is never really the correct term to describe anyone.
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It was up to Zia to enjoy herself. But I can't agree when you say it was okay for her to entangled in a love triangle. She was in a serious relationship with Bryce. If she felt insecure or her needs are not fulfilled, then she should have left Bryce but not cheat on him. Seemingly the author too does not support what Zia did, and maybe that is why he removed Baxter from the story at the end and brought Zia back to Bryce.Kaushiki Parihar wrote: ↑06 Aug 2021, 09:11 I do not believe that she is a sexaholic or an introvert. In my opinion, she is a unique and confident woman. So what if she's anti-social with some people and is entangled in a love triangle. There's nothing wrong with having sex. Zia does what she wants and enjoys, and I think it's her way of loving and caring for herself.
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Yes, she embraced what she felt and she was confident to do that though she could never do anything in that nature because of her anxiety. She could even suppress her anxiety and get close to Baxter, just for sex. And what that makes her other than a sexaholic? She needed sex and she got it somehow, and she could not see how wrong was what she did.Ruchi Raina wrote: ↑06 Aug 2021, 12:46 I don't think we can call her a sexaholic. I mean we see her embracing what she felt. Most of us indeed tend to ignore the obvious signs when we like someone, no matter if it's a man or woman. We can't judge her for exploring sexually. She is confident enough about it and that's okay.
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I don't see her behaviour as just loving sex. She admired male body. Her mind and body often turned up towards her lovers through sexual thoughts. She needed sex and needed it frequently. When she did not get sex from one lover she went to another. I think these facts are enough to describe her craving for sex more than simply loving it.
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I partially agree with you. Yes, she explored every bit of a romantic relationship. She got loved and cared from Bryce and she got the passionate sex from Baxter. But was she confident in what she did? No I don't think so. At first we see how she was blinded by her lust and did the wrong thing. Later she felt how wrong what she did but she was either not confident enough to leave or was succumbed too much in her sexual desires. So I see her as a sex maniac than a romantic passionate lover.Miriam nkere wrote: ↑06 Aug 2021, 14:07 I don't think she is sexaholic, shes a rare and unique character, sex is a sweet, passionate and romantic thing. Zia lennox is confident and comfortable with her sexuality which most woman are not. She explored every of her moment to the fullest with her two different lovers.
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That is what I say too. She was treated in peculiar ways through her childhood and adulthood mostly because of her character qualities. Even her family members see her as an introvert and an anti-social. And she was suffering from anxiety disorder. She could not confidently remain in a single romantic relationship. But when it came to sex and bodily pleasures suddenly she became confident. Seemingly the only thing that she have sought throughout her life to be herself and control herself was sex.Katie Canedy wrote: ↑06 Aug 2021, 15:27 I am about 25% through the book, and I do not think that she is a sexaholic. Yes, she does have problems that stem from her childhood and the way she was treated by men once she got older. But the fact that she is able to be so confident in herself when it comes to sex is commendable.
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Maybe the author neglected that aspect, or he might have simply needed the reader to think that her anxiety was cured with the tender lloving care provided by Bryce. And then only she knew what she really needed, sex, and then she went to Baxter for that. Though she did not totally threw away the relationship with Bryce, she got in another one to simply fulfill her sexual desires. I don't think she did not feel wanted by Bryce. But lack of sex with Bryce was a big matter to her.6eyed wrote: ↑06 Aug 2021, 20:17 Zia doesn't throw away her relationship for sex, she only engages in it when she gets emotionally carried away. Her main motivation is to feel wanted, not the physical aspect of sex. If she were a sexaholic, she would not have had reservations about having sex with a stranger (Amahle's boyfriend) near the end of the book.
As for her anxiety disorder, I feel like the author started out with a certain character type in mind for Zia then changed it without updating the beginning of the book. Though I would have enjoyed reading about how her relationships allow her to become more confident and therefore more confident in her sexuality, her anxiety is mostly gone after her relationship with Bryce begins. This whole development is done off-screen, so I felt like the author neglected to connect her anxiety to her sexuality in a meaningful way.
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Do you think that being modern means having no respect towards traditional relationships and achieving what you wish for by either hook or crook? If that is what the author thought too then he has portrayed that in a perfect example through Zia's character. As even you says, Zia is a sexual magnet. She is sexually attracted to men and she doenot think twice when she get into sex (though at the latter stages she began to see her faults). Are these not enough to name her as a sexaholic? And if she is the perfect example for a modern woman, are all modern women are sexaholics?
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Having no sex with Bryce could have been a problem to Zia if she was attracted to him physically. But she felt the love and security from him and she loved that feeling. And I think she could easily have been contended with that unless she was a sexaholic (well she was not a one at first since she had not experienced that, but we see how she harboured sexual feelings and an ability for easy arousal in her). Will a sane person go to an unofficial lover just to satisfy her sexual needs unless she was addicted to sex?Chimuka Muungo wrote: ↑07 Aug 2021, 02:54 I do not think she was a sexaholic. I do believe though that her relationship with Bryce went on for too long without sexual intercourse that it was no suprise that she found herself in the arms of Baxter who she was already attracted too even before any physical interaction. And he kept on filling that void each time she went to New York.