Official Review: The boulders of my Life That Shaped my J...

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Official Review: The boulders of my Life That Shaped my J...

Post by stoppoppingtheP »

[Following is the official OnlineBookClub.org review of "The boulders of my Life That Shaped my Journey" by Honey Badger.]
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2 out of 4 stars
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“I wrote this book to tell the story of my life and how I have experienced being raped six times.” This is the opening line of this book. From this sentence I was hooked, and thought that it was sure to be a gripping story.
The Boulders of my Life That Shaped my Journey is a Non-Fictional, autobiographical account of the author, Honey Badger’s journey through the trials and the hardships that she has been through in her life.

The autobiography begins by the author telling us of her childhood and of the first time that she was raped, at eleven years old. As the story continues she explains the other instances where she was sexually abused, during college and when she was part of the military.

Since her family had a strong tradition of serving in the army, Honey felt that it was her duty to do so as well. So she joined the military, working on the ships. However, she gets raped once again, by what is supposed to be one of her co-workers. Reporting the incidence is futile as nothing seems to be done about it. The senior officers blame her for what had happened and call her a liar and a “walking mattress”, in her words. Honey describes the fears she has, the unending trauma, the Post Traumatic Stress Disorder(PTSD) she suffers, the violence she commits against herself by burning and cutting herself, as well as the fact that senior officers and people in authority do not seem to want to help in any way.

The first few pages are written in past tense story form, but from page 22 onwards till the last page the book is written in journal form.

The topic of the book is a very important one and a deeply worrying one that needs to be addressed. Sexual abuse in schools, colleges, the military and many other institutions is a real problem. Many people do not want to discuss this topic because they view it as something shameful and something to be swept under the carpet. What is shameful is that we as human beings are not addressing this issue, and creating social structures that prevent this from happening as well as punishing the perpetrators.

When I first started reading this book I thought that it was going to surely get a high rating from me, especially considering the important topic at hand. However, as I continued reading the book I felt that there was a lot of constant repetition of the same subject. The same lines were constantly being re-written.

I was deeply disappointed because I felt that if the author had written her story in a more compelling manner, perhaps leave out a lot of the repetition it would be a much more captivating read, and would have gotten a much higher rating. As it is, although readers may empathise with the writer, people are picky with their time and they may not like to wade through her journal entries which say much of the same things over and over. This is why I am giving the book a two out of four stars. I also felt that the book just seemed to end suddenly, and without a proper wrapping up of the subject. Although the topic is a very important one, the book is not very well written, but if the reader does want to see a personal viewpoint of a person who has undergone this trauma, I would encourage them to read this book.

******
The boulders of my Life That Shaped my Journey
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“there have been so many times
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but
instead
beat his heart until it was unconscious.

-masculine”


― Nayyirah Waheed
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Post by bookowlie »

Nice, insightful review. It's too bad there was so much repetition in the book. I think a good editor would have made the story more concise.
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Post by stoppoppingtheP »

Yes. I definitely think that the topic of the book is so important, and a personal viewpoint would grasp readers attention and bring this topic to light. If only the author can perhaps re-edit the book and publish it again it would make it much better.

“there have been so many times
i have seen a man wanting to weep
but
instead
beat his heart until it was unconscious.

-masculine”


― Nayyirah Waheed
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Post by authorhoneybadger »

I am the author and I think people that care about rape will like my book. I am sorry that you did not like what I wrote. It's my story and what I live every day.

-- 20 May 2015, 13:02 --

Also the the reviewer, maybe you need to understand that my repetitive voice was my strategy for pulling my reader into the inescapable and repetitive memories that go along with PTSD....and the exhausting work involved in keeping the demons away... fighting against being retraumatized by memories of what no one should ever endure...
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Post by bookowlie »

Whatever the author thinks of the review, StoppoppingtheP (the reviewer) did his/her job and gave an honest review. A review is one person's opinion of the book.
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Post by stoppoppingtheP »

People are bombarded with images of suffering everywhere. If you watch or read the news, you always come across heartwrenching stories of so many people. Unfortunately, this leads people to become desensitized, and although they may care about a certain topic, they become selective in what they read. So although you may have written the book in a manner that lays your feelings bare, and to the best of your ability; perhaps an editor would know how to present the story in the best light.

I am sorry that you were not pleased with my review, but the purpose of the review is to be as truthful as possible otherwise it defeats the whole purpose of writing the review.

It is not that I did not like your book. I think you are very brave for attempting such an endeavor, and I hope that you find justice for all the pain that you have gone through.

“there have been so many times
i have seen a man wanting to weep
but
instead
beat his heart until it was unconscious.

-masculine”


― Nayyirah Waheed
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Post by authorhoneybadger »

Perhaps you try being raped and living with PTSD and then maybe you would understand the what you call "repetition"
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Post by zeldas_lullaby »

authorhoneybadger wrote:Perhaps you try being raped and living with PTSD and then maybe you would understand the what you call "repetition"
HoneyB, I have never been raped. I have been through other hells, some of a physical nature. Please, don't take a 2-star review to heart. You found your voice, you spoke up, and you shared your story; and that has a value that can't be measured.

However, on its merits alone, the reviewer had to be fair. But I PROMISE you that he is not saying that you deserved to go through that hell. He's just saying that he had some issues with your book's presentation.

I wish I could help you more. :|
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Post by bookowlie »

authorhoneybadger wrote:Perhaps you try being raped and living with PTSD and then maybe you would understand the what you call "repetition"
I am sorry for everything you have been through. It took a lot of courage for you to write a book about your personal experiences for strangers to read. Still, you requested a review from this site. The process entails a reviewer reading the book in return for an honest review. It would be good to take the review as constructive criticism, instead of taking the comments in the review personally.
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Post by zeldas_lullaby »

bookowlie wrote:
authorhoneybadger wrote:Perhaps you try being raped and living with PTSD and then maybe you would understand the what you call "repetition"
I am sorry for everything you have been through. It took a lot of courage for you to write a book about your personal experiences for strangers to read. Still, you requested a review from this site. The process entails a reviewer reading the book in return for an honest review. It would be good to take the review as constructive criticism, instead of taking the comments in the review personally.
I completely agree with that, BookOwlie. The problem here is that everything she wrote was deeply personal. I think that's why she's having a hard time not taking it personally. I mean, you're completely right, of course. But separating out the personal aspects from the writing criticism is tougher with this book, I'd imagine, than with a fiction book.

But yes, if she could not take it personally, that would be great. So much easier said than done, I'd reckon, but it would be great.
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Post by bookowlie »

zeldas_lullaby wrote:
bookowlie wrote:
authorhoneybadger wrote:Perhaps you try being raped and living with PTSD and then maybe you would understand the what you call "repetition"
I am sorry for everything you have been through. It took a lot of courage for you to write a book about your personal experiences for strangers to read. Still, you requested a review from this site. The process entails a reviewer reading the book in return for an honest review. It would be good to take the review as constructive criticism, instead of taking the comments in the review personally.
I completely agree with that, BookOwlie. The problem here is that everything she wrote was deeply personal. I think that's why she's having a hard time not taking it personally. I mean, you're completely right, of course. But separating out the personal aspects from the writing criticism is tougher with this book, I'd imagine, than with a fiction book.

But yes, if she could not take it personally, that would be great. So much easier said than done, I'd reckon, but it would be great.
I agree with everything you posted, but the author's comments do seem unfair to the reviewer. I mean, this is a professional review site. I can't imagine how the author would react to Amazon reviews, since those reviews are not subject to guidelines and edited by a Review Team. I am sensitive to the author's personal story; however, the guidelines of the review process here are clear.
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Post by zeldas_lullaby »

Yes, and I respect that. I feel bad for the writer in this case, but I certainly stand by the 2-star review. I hope I haven't implied otherwise. I guess you could say I'm torn and can see it from both sides. I don't think that there was a single thing wrong with StopP's review. Nothing at all. This is what I think went wrong: the author self-published this book before completely getting her head on straight. That was an error in judgment, and my heart is more-or-less bleeding for her.

But yes, the review is valid and I certainly have no beef with it. I just hope that the author is OK.
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Post by stoppoppingtheP »

I don't really like the way in which the author reacted, and her harsh comment back at me. However, I do not want this to become a mudslinging match so I will ignore it.

I agree with the other posts, that yes, the author is seeing this with an emotional perspective and feels that this is a judgement on her. I assure you that it is most certainly not. I feel that this book needed to be written and this subject needs to be addressed. However, my critique was mostly to do with the layout and language of the book.

“there have been so many times
i have seen a man wanting to weep
but
instead
beat his heart until it was unconscious.

-masculine”


― Nayyirah Waheed
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Post by bookowlie »

Well said. As for the content of the book, it is certainly horrifying, including the way the senior officers treated her. While I waiting for take-out recently at a restaurant, the waitress/cashier and I started chatting. Well, she told me that she left the military after 18 months after being sexually assaulted by a co-worker. She didn't report it officially, as the guy was a superior and friends with the team who would have overseen the investigation. I felt really bad for her as it affected her career path.
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Post by zeldas_lullaby »

stoppoppingtheP wrote:I don't really like the way in which the author reacted, and her harsh comment back at me. However, I do not want this to become a mudslinging match so I will ignore it.

I agree with the other posts, that yes, the author is seeing this with an emotional perspective and feels that this is a judgement on her. I assure you that it is most certainly not. I feel that this book needed to be written and this subject needs to be addressed. However, my critique was mostly to do with the layout and language of the book.
Your review was very well-written. You've got no argument from me.

Yes, indeed, if the author could clarify her story and format it better, then it would benefit society all the more than her book already does. :-)
bookowlie wrote:Well said. As for the content of the book, it is certainly horrifying, including the way the senior officers treated her. While I waiting for take-out recently at a restaurant, the waitress/cashier and I started chatting. Well, she told me that she left the military after 18 months after being sexually assaulted by a co-worker. She didn't report it officially, as the guy was a superior and friends with the team who would have overseen the investigation. I felt really bad for her as it affected her career path.
It's too bad her career path was affected, but I'm just glad it didn't screw her up royally in the head. Being physically and/or sexually assaulted can be very difficult to recover from, in worse ways than having a messed-up career path.

To anyone out there who's reading this, I highly recommend EMDR therapy. It is one of the only effective treatments for PTSD that I have come across. :-)
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