Official Review: Crossing the Line by Tom Doulis

[HalcyonFlower]

[Following is the official OnlineBookClub.org review of "Crossing the Line" by Tom Doulis.]

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1 out of 4 stars

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“Crossing the Line” by Thomas Doulis features a whodunit as one of the characters, Jones Andrews, is brutally beaten in the opening chapter of the novel. Lee, the main protagonist, investigates the situation by returning to Andrews’ home state.

The backbone of a novel, in my opinion, is the mastery of characters. In this case, there was an absence of it. It wasn’t until the 34th page that I began to get a better bearing of the plot. It seemed the writing technique was an attempt at character introspection but coupled with the large ensemble of characters, it only led to a lot of confusion. Who was related to who? Who was this character, were they mentioned briefly before? None of the characters were flushed out until a later point in the novel and I had re-read the first 34 pages multiple times. Because I didn’t do this for the rest of the novel, I’m still quite confused to date with the events and each character’s place in the story.

As the plot progressed, the narrative featured an increased amount of flashbacks meant to develop characters and add an air of intrigue. This wasn’t executed properly due to the lack of transition between scenes, especially chapters from Andrews’ P.o.V. In the first few chapters, the dialogue was clever and I could definitely imagine the specific character saying it. This crispness was lost in later chapters as the cast grew. Along with the growing cast, the opinions on government and policies expanded as well, making it difficult to keep track of who thought what.

Along with these obstacles, there were some formatting, punctuation and spelling errors which had me believe that the latter part of the novel was rushed. In comparison, I would say that the beginning had much more care and attention put into but not enough to pull the reader into the book’s reality. For example, in Chapter 1, the investigator in charge of this case spent some time with the protagonist and I could feel the annoying “cop-ness” but his characterization slowly disintegrated. Because of all of these factors, the ending wasn’t as satisfying or appreciated as could’ve been.

I rate this novel 1 out of 4 stars because it strongly feels like an early draft rather than the final. The characters need more attention and presented in a manner that any reader can appreciate them properly instead of being confused by their back story. My recommendation would be to write a few more drafts with the mindset of the reader instead of the author as that makes the difference with understanding. Once it’s been edited a few times, I believe those readers with a great interest in history will enjoy this novel.

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Crossing the Line
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Like HalcyonFlower's review? Post a comment saying so!

[Heidi M Simone]

Nice review! Sorry that the book wasn't as good as it could've been. I don't think it's my cup of tea either, but I enjoyed reading your review!

[HalcyonFlower]

Thank you! I like politically motivated novels but don't like it when integration isn't executed well. I was worried this review was really negative so I definitely appreciate your thoughts!

[chytach18-]

Unfortunately, so many books are "first draft" nowadays, with the possibility and opportunity of self-publishing. Like you, HalcyonFlower, I also think that the characters development is essential for a good novel. Nice review.

[Tanaya]

Great review! Your 1-star rating is incredibly well justified. I like that you gave very specific and useful feedback for the author, and hopefully the author takes your words into careful consideration to make the work stronger.

[amybo82]

I agree with Tanaya--you did a nice job of justifying your rating. I like your review overall, and I hope the author can utilize some of your suggestions to improve future works!

[HalcyonFlower]

@chytach18
It's an unfortunate trend and I'm not sure why it would be the case. To get their story out there and make money? I researched the publishing company and was surprised it wasn't a self-published novel. I'm not sure why the company wouldn't put the novel through more edits or ask for much more refined characters but that just might be me. Thank you for the comment!

@Tanaya
I'm glad my review justifies the rating. I do hope the author considers my suggestion because it seems he has the knowledge to write about an interesting time in history.

@amybo82
Thank you for your comment and I love your signature - Neil Gaiman is slowly becoming one of my favourite guys

[kimmyschemy06]

That was a very honest review. One of the reasons why a reader enjoys a book is that he/she falls in love with the characters. So, it is imperative that characters are solidly built up.

[HalcyonFlower]

That was a very honest review. One of the reasons why a reader enjoys a book is that he/she falls in love with the characters. So, it is imperative that characters are solidly built up.

Exactly, there are some shoddy books out there but I wouldn't mind buying if the character is amazing. Thank you for your comment!

[Cee-Jay Aurinko]

I like the feedback in this review, HalcyonFlower. I think there's just too many authors out there who finished a first draft with minor editing here and there and they're like, Ah, I finished my book! The great books are the ones that are rewritten at least once.

[Emmanuel]

Although I've not read this book, I love the description of this reviewer. It sounds sincere and progressive

[HalcyonFlower]

I like the feedback in this review, HalcyonFlower. I think there's just too many authors out there who finished a first draft with minor editing here and there and they're like, Ah, I finished my book! The great books are the ones that are rewritten at least once.

I agree with you, Cee-Jay. It's frustrating because these books have the potential to be phenomenal but then the cop-out happens and degrades the quality. This is the major problem I'm coming across with indie authors so far and I truly hope they invest in editors in the future.

Although I've not read this book, I love the description of this reviewer. It sounds sincere and progressive

Thank you

[kirolloisdose]

Love it so much

[HalcyonFlower]

Love it so much

Thanks