Review by Jade Smith -- Marrying a Playboy Billionaire

[Jade Smith]

[Following is a volunteer review of "Marrying a Playboy Billionaire" by H M Irwing.]

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1 out of 4 stars

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I rate this book 1 out of 4.
It was very hard to read, but I trudged through because I knew that behind this book was an author that really wanted to be good, and I hope I help them with this evaluation. This book was very trite because it relied on Harlequin stereotypes, some of which I can't discuss here due to Spoilers.

Marrying a Playboy Millionaire is a Harlequin novel written by H.M. Irwing. Aria Longbottom is still upset that her ex left her for her cousin five years ago. She slept with her ex's best friend, Justin Kay, at New Year's Eve. When she approaches Justin with a business deal, he makes it clear he wants more. This story follows them as they get together. I admire how this author wanted to have humor and banter and deep revelations. I still don’t see a clear theme.

The author has a beautiful vocabulary, and really wants you to know it, by whipping it out at every opportunity. Some fancy words I appreciate, but if I need to have a dictionary on standby to get through every paragraph, it's too highbrow. The dialogue was unrealistic and awkward. Some things were reinforced until it made you numb. I was stuck in Aria's head as she prattled on about things in a confusing order. Justin was obsessed over for his looks, and his annoying personality was unbearable. None of the characters were flawed, but likeable, with the most bizarre and even terrifying mood swings. Character descriptions and even speech tags were too much.

This book did have good enough spelling, impressively so on big words, but the grammar was a bit off. You can start a sentence of with and, but it should be done tastefully, and flow with the story, which it didn't in this case. Words were singular when they should have been plural and vice versa. The book's timing and pace was way off. They were rarely on the same page, and this was painted as being cute or even funny. I couldn't believe these were real people going through meaningful life changes.

If I could advise Irwing, I would say, "Cut the prologue. Rewrite the book in first person. Give the story a stronger start that defined Aria original character, so that we could see what she has to change about herself. Make the side characters memorable and important, not cliché props. Make the leading man more realistic, unique, and desirable. Leave out the tired tropes. Make the time shifts in each chapter more fluid. If you can't, start at the same spot you left off at during the last chapter. Address the characters' past in a more readable way. Listen to how people talk to make your dialogue more believable. Have more editors read your story, and listen to their feedback. Research how couples fall in love and work together beside in the bedroom. And please, revise those sex scenes or cut them out."

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Marrying a Playboy Billionaire
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